Being Yourself Is Hard
by Slushie Addict
Summary: It's hard to act like a character in a musical that you so happen to share the same name with, especially when you may be completely different from said character in terms of personality and fashion choices. (Modern AU with lots of OOC!)
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys! I'm Slushie Addict and this is my first time writing in this fandom. Before you guys say anything, I got some ideas from Heathers: Cut (JD and Veronica) written by AKUltiWarrior. However, I want to make it clear that I'm **not** hijacking their plot in the slightest. Also, this is set in a Modern AU and due to the story line, many of the characters will be OOC. Swearing is included in this story. With that, I don't own Heathers!

XXXXXX

"You did _what_?!" A girl no older than 17 yelled at another girl, presumably her friend. "Martha Dunnstock, I cannot believe you did that!"

"Veronica, this is your chance! Didn't you always want to act up on stage? Now's your chance, while it isn't Broadway or anything well-established, it's still an opportunity!" Martha argued, trying to convince her best friend. Veronica groaned, while she did want the chance to go up on stage to act, she would prefer it if her best friend had talked to her about it _before_ signing her up for auditions. "Veronica, are you alright?"

"I'm... I'm good. I guess I should thank you at least, your intentions are well-meaning anyways..." Veronica relented, placing a grateful hand on Martha's right shoulder. "When's the audition?"

"After school at 3. There were quite a number of names, but I'm sure you can get in!" Martha cheerfully answered, pushing up her glasses.

"Now hold on here, I never said I'll go. I only said that I was grateful for your well intentions!" Veronica said, her lips curling up. "Unless you sign yourself up for auditions that is."

"V-Veronica! You know I get shy on stage!" Martha protested, but Veronica was having none of it. "C'mon, let me off please?"

"Look, it's a chance for you to get over your stage fright. Besides, it's not guaranteed that you'll be landing the main lead right? So don't worry so much!" Martha sighed, nodding to Veronica's request. Veronica smiled, relieved to know that someone that she knows will be joining her for auditions.

"Well Ronnie, no need to convince Martha here to join ya for auditions. I've already signed her up when I went to sign myself up for it and saw your name there." A low male voice chuckled behind Veronica, causing the two girls to turn around and come face to face with a lanky boy in a hoodie. "Hey there ladies, missed me?"

"JD! Why did you do that?!" Martha asked, shocked to know that she was signed up without her knowledge. Veronica laughed along with JD, real name Jason Dean. "Well, at least Veronica's definitely going to the auditions now..."

"Oh believe me, I'll drag her to the auditorium myself if I didn't see her there at 2.45." JD continued, ruffling Veronica's hair. "Not gonna miss a chance to act on stage with Ronnie here."

"Hey now, the thing starts at 3, no need to hunt me down in study hall 15 minutes before it." Veronica nudged JD, earning herself a shrug from the latter. "Anyways, do you know what are we auditioning for?"

"Hm, a musical if I'm not wrong? No biggie, all three of us are awesome at singing." JD responded, grinning at Veronica. "Shall we trudge over there now? I'm sure there's some eye candy for ya waiting at the auditorium~"

"JD! Sheesh, no need to announce that I'm gay!"

"Sorry gorgeous, just wanna let lesbians and bi girls know that my hot gay best friend is single." Martha chuckled along with JD, it wasn't that much of a secret that Veronica was into girls ever since she came out last year. While everyone treated her normally, it didn't give her any relationships either. "For reals though, shall we get going?"

"Heh, yeah. C'mon Martha, let's knock the auditions outta the park!"

"For someone who isn't interested, you sure are fired up~"

"Oh hush Martha."

XXXXXX

"Is it me, or is it a coincidence that our names are exactly the same as the characters in the musical?" Martha asked, holding up a booklet that summarised the details of the musical they were auditioning for and the characters' bio. "Like, they even have the same spelling!"

"Urgh, of all musicals it has to be 'Heathers'." Veronica grumbled, while she liked that musical, she wasn't exactly comfortable with the fact that one of her best friends attempted suicide in the musical and her other best friend tried to blow up a school. Also, she didn't like that she had a part to play in three 'suicides' in trying to make school more tolerable for her. "The resemblance is uncanny indeed."

"Oh c'mon you two, not like we're a shoo-in for the part." JD reassured, jerking a thumb at a stout man. "Lookie, here's the teach that came up with this shit. We can go ask if we're shoo-ins or not."

"Great idea!" The two girls agreed instantly going up to the teacher with JD following behind them. "Mr Zaly, we're not definitely getting the part just because our names happen to match the characters right?"

"If you guys can sing, then yeah, you guys are getting the part." Veronica gaped at the teacher, not believing what she was hearing. Upon seeing the looks on Veronica's face, he decided to clarify what he meant by that reply. "Okay look, you guys signed up for the main cast. So if you guys can sing, we might as well match you up with the characters that you share the name with. And in case you're wondering, all nine of you have the exact same name as the main characters."

"Nine?! Main cast?! Martha!" Veronica turned to face Martha, who was cowering behind JD at this point. "Explain yourself! You said that there were quite a few names, so how the hell did you not see the rest of the people who signed up?!"

"I-I was the first to fill in your name! Besides, I thought since there were two pieces of paper outside, I should fill in the one that's empty! I didn't know they were separate!" Martha stammered, gripping on JD's hoodie tightly. Veronica slapped a hand to her forehead, due to a misunderstanding she was now auditioning for a main role. "JD, why didn't you tell us?"

"That's cause I signed us both up after your name. I don't know who signed up afterwards, so yeah. Anyways, I had the same mindset as Martha so I also don't know that the one I filled in was actually for the main cast." JD shrugged, which wasn't doing much to soften Veronica's anger. "Hey teach, why didn't you make things clear?!"

"Mr Allen was the one who put those up! He said that he didn't want to hear 'tone-deaf brats' so he volunteered to put up posters and admin shit." Mr Zaly replied, going up to the trio. "On the bright side, at least I'm not handling the side characters' audition."

"Hold up, you said 'six'. Isn't there only five? Heathers, Kurt and Ram make the other five mains. So who's the sixth?"

"That would be her." The teacher pointed to a girl who looked irritated to be present for the audition. "Pauline Fleming, sophomore. She's... in the student council I think?"

"Remind me again why someone who look pissed 24/7 is the president?" JD asked, frowning at the sight of the girl. Veronica elbowed JD, and went up to Pauline. "Ronnie, what the fuck are you doing?"

"Hey Pauline, I didn't know you're interested in performing." Veronica said, stunning JD with her friendliness.

"Oh, hey Sawyer. Yeah, I figured I give this a whirl. Saw your name on the sign-up sheet, deciding to make your big break here?" Pauline replied, not reacting like how JD had expected her to, which was to coldly brush Veronica off.

"Pauline, I told you to call me by my first name! We're fucking neighbours for crying out loud!"

"Old habits die hard. How's it going with your boyfriend?" Pauline shot a look at JD, who returned the favour. "Seems like I've some ways to go with being on good terms with Dean."

"Ahaha... about that... we kinda broke up last year... and I came out as a lesbian..." Veronica awkwardly laughed, trying to make it seem like a small matter.

"What the fuck Sawyer, am I the only one who didn't know? Geez, some friend you are."

"Well if you didn't stay in the council room so much, you would have heard it!" Veronica and Pauline continued to talk for another 15 minutes, leaving JD alone with Martha. JD wasn't sure what he should do, so he decided to flip through the booklet and dropped it in horror a minute later.

"Aw hell no! Why the fuck does JD wanna blow up the school?! That's fucking messed up man!" JD exclaimed, horrified at the fact that he had to act as some demented sociopath who believed that he was doing the world a favour by ridding 'bad' people from the face of the earth. "Teach! Can I like get a swap?!"

"All of the guys will die in the musical at one point, so no. Besides, you get to drink a Slurpee during the musical." Mr Zaly replied, shaking his head in a teasing manner. "Careful not to get an actual brain freeze though."

"But I don't _like_ Slurpees! I have sensitive teeth!"

"Your acting will be even more convincing, ain't that great?"

"No it won't teach! God, at least rent a Big Gulp machine!"

XXXXXX

"Heather, remind me again why are we accompanying you to this stupid audition? I could be at home practicing the piano!" An irritated blonde girl whose hair was tied up in a high ponytail asked, cursing under her breath afterwards. The supposed recipient of the question, a girl with shoulder length brown hair, chuckled, clearly not the least bit threatened by the first girl's attitude towards her. The third and last girl, another blonde but her hair was tied into a low ponytail instead, quietly followed behind the other two girls. "Heather, aren't you the least bit mad at this bitch?!"

"... I-I want to be in the backstage crew..." The third girl, full name Heather Chandler, replied meekly, fearing that the first girl would hit her. "H-Heather, why did you sign me up for the main cast auditions...?"

"You need some confidence Heather! Besides, we're doing the musical 'Heathers' this year!" The second girl, Heather Duke, cheerily replied and ignoring the cursing coming from Heather McNamara afterwards. "It'll be fun! You get to push me around and use me and yell at me a lot!"

"Fucking hell! You signed me up so that I can act like the good little girl that my asshole parents want me to be?! Did you eat a brain tumour for breakfast Heather?! What in fuck's name do you think I'm game for this shit?!" Heather cursed, giving Heather the middle finger. "Go eat shit you fucking shitty bitch!"

"H-Heather... maybe you could swear a little less...?" Heather asked, trying her best to end the soon to be argument between Heather and Heather. "P-Please?"

"... Fuck, fine. I'm gonna convince that sadist asshole who wanted the fucking play to switch roles with me and Heather." Heather relented upon noticing Heather's puppy eyes. "God Heather, you'll be the death of me someday."

"You know what's gonna be the death of me? You two being friends, you two couldn't be more different." Heather remarked, eyeing the shy Heather and then the crude Heather. "Remind me again why am I friends with you Heather?"

"Because I copied off your stuff back in third grade and you were so fucking happy that I spoke to you and declared that we're 'best buddies for life' according to you." replied, glancing at the people present in the auditorium. "That and because I was bitching about how Veronica was being a bitch because she took your pudding. Speak of the devil, Veronica and gang are here. And... the council president?! Fuck, someone hide me! I pushed her around yesterday!"

"H-Heather, I'm not big enough to cover you..." Heather said, referencing to her skeletal frame that revealed how underweight she was. "And maybe you should apologise...?"

"Just say that I'm fat, I don't mind."

"No, you're not. Y-You're just rude..." Heather mumbled something under her breath before continuing with her explanation. "But I know you can be gentle when we're in private..."

"Heather has a gentler side?!"

"Y-Yeah..."

"This is hilarious!" Heather laughed until not only did her sides hurt, but tears were coming out of her eyes. She pulled out a green handkerchief to dab away her tears, but her hand kept on shaking from laughing. "Ahahahahahahahahahaha!"

"... I would fuck you up right here and now if only Heather wasn't here..." Heather gritted her teeth and tightened her grip on Heather's shoulders. "Heather, I'll give you a massage. Tell me if it hurts."

"... Y-You're hurting me already though..."

XXXXXX

"So like, are you guys down for a party? Allen-man was like suggesting that the main cast come in for a party to get to know each other, be besties and all?" An extremely muscular male asked Veronica, Martha, JD and Pauline, a grin shot at Martha's way.

"Seriously Ram? He said that? Why can't we just create a chat group or something, it's 2017 after all." Veronica asked, crossing her arms. She's not against the idea of having a gathering, but she was against the idea of her _being_ a part of that gathering when all she really wanted was to lounge around in the comfort of her house. "And really, 'Allen-man'? It's been four years already, why do you still call him that?"

"Y'know, Allen-man, Ironman? Sounds similar? Anyhoo yeah, he said that too. Kurt's over there asking Heathers if they wanna attend. Actually to be honest, Allen-man was telling us to make you guys come but we think that's like not cool and all cuz we need to respect each other." Ram admitted, scratching his neck. "But if you guys _are_ cool, then we can make plans in the group!"

"Whoa hold the phone there Ram, it's not like we're all guaranteed to be in you know? Some of us may not be able to sing here."

"Asked him that too V, and he said we're all in cuz our Music grades showed that we're all able to sing." Veronica slapped her forehead again, frustrated that not only was she playing as a main character, but _the_ main character in the musical. "Sorry V, tried to talk him outta it but he ain't having it."

"Urgh fine, do whatever. You three are fine with social gatherings and stuff after all right?" Veronica turned to the other three, who all shot sympathetic looks. "Aw don't give me the pity look! I can survive a few hours at Ram's house!"

"Uh yeah... 'bout that... Allen-man said that he wanted us to sleepover and record what we're doing hourly. One day one night kinda gathering, sooooo..." Ram scooted away from Veronica, dashing out of the auditorium afterwards. "Pleasedon'tkillmeokaybye!"

"... I fucking hate Mr Allen. Who put him in charge?!' Veronica seethed, cracking her knuckles and imagining herself beating up said teacher.

"He's teaching American Lit! What do you expect?!" Mr Zaly yelled from his seat, which was far away from Veronica and gang.

"Then why are you also in charge of this mess? You're a Physics teacher." JD asked, smirking at the man's grumbling. "Got yourself roped into it by Mr Allen huh?"

"Pffft, I'm not alone. Mrs Horndog is in charge of the side cast audition and Ms Religion is forced to get her English class to be backstage as there aren't enough people for it."

"I'm still not convinced that that's their actual family names." Pauline whispered to Martha, who nodded in agreement. "Especially Mrs Horndog's. It sounds too much like a joke to be true."

"I heard her maiden name is actually 'Cunt', and the spelling is _exactly_ how it sounds like." Martha whispered, giggling over her gossip.

"Ms Cunt?! Man, who the hell gave themselves that kind of family name? I mean, Fleming isn't bad cause it's after a famous person but hers is just plain weird. And sad."

"Anyways, just listen to when Mr Allen says and not fuck up." Mr Zaly advised, getting up from his seat. "I'm gonna use the gents, you guys can actually go back now you know."

"Fuck yeah, Martha, you got the movie yet?" Veronica asked, her mood taking a turn for the better. Martha nodded, with JD pointing to himself with an innocent smile plastered on his face. "... Fine, JD you can tag along. Pauline, you wanna come over?"

"I'll pass, unless you're teaching me Chemistry." Pauline shrugged, pulling out her smartphone. "Huh, looks like Sweeney added us already."

"Alright, so the four of us are gonna be watching 'Frozen' and doing Chem tonight. Awesome, come over at nine and make sure you two bring some food along. I'm not going to let you guys chow down on Martha's popcorn." JD and Pauline looked at each other, and rolled their eyes before leaving the auditorium. Veronica and Martha followed suit, discussing about what did Kurt have to do in order to convince Heather (McNamara) and Heather (Chandler) to attend the 'party'.

XXXXXX

 _sweeneytodd: [hey guys so sunday cool with u all?]_

 _Veronica: [I don't care, this is hell...]_

 _McNamara: [then why the fk did u sign up]_

 _JD: [martha signed her up, thk god she did]_

 _Duke: [thats totes awesome]_

 _KK: [i know dude]_

 _KK: [what time are u guys down at rammy?]_

 _Fleming: [7]_

 _Marthabear: [pls tell us you meant in the morning?]_

 _Fleming: [7am, Monday morning]_

 _JD: [ur horrible flmng]_

 _Fleming: [You're right beside me, you could have just said that to my face.]_

 _sweeneytodd: [wheres chandler?]_

 _McNamara: [shes only available fm 8am-6pm]_

 _Veronica: [Why?]_

 _Duke: [no idea]_

 _KK: [she said yes just now so she shld be cool]_

 _sweeneytodd: [lol but how wld we contact her today is wed only!]_

 _Duke: [how abt letters? Mcbk here has sent her some]_

 _McNamara: [duke i will murder u in ur sleep if you tell them what i wrote]_

 _Veronica: [I don't give a shit.]_

 _KK: [mac is gd in english right]_

 _KK: [u wrote that sweet poem in 7th grade]_

 _sweeneytodd: [o yea, then teach sent it for a competition n u won first place]_

 _Marthabear: [is there a better way to reach chandler outside sch though? we dun know her address]_

 _Duke: [i send it later]_

 _McNamara: [duke i swear to god that u send that text i WILL fk you with a chainsaw!]_

 _JD: [holy shit what the fk is that possible?!]_

 _Fleming: [... This has gone from peaceful Wednesday night to insane Wednesday night.]_

 _JD: [yea dude]_

 _JD: [imma going out to buy some marshies?]_

 _JD: [flmng u want slush or gulp?]_

 _Fleming: [Fuck Physics, I'm going out for Slurpee with JD]_

 _KK: [ok bai]_

"Should we like bring marshmallows on Sunday or can we just come empty-handed?" Heather asked Heather, who was busy flipping through television channels and settling on Nickelodeon. "Really? Fucking Nickelodeon?"

"Shut the fuck up, I wanna watch cartoons."

"Then watch your 'Loud House' recordings, they're taking up space and I need that fucking space to record my K-Dramas!"

"Oh c'mon you've already memorised it by heart, it's the water god spouting some cheesy lines about how he'll stay with that brokeass bitch till she dies."

"That's not how it go- hey! Don't change to Spongebob!"

"Ohhhhhhhh-"

"Heather McNamara, don't you dare-"

"Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Spongebob Squarepants!"

"Oh Jesus fucking Christ kill me now..."

XXXXXX

That's all for Chapter 1, I promise that the next chapter will give you a somewhat more detailed bio on the modern day cast! And heads up, the actual musical wouldn't really be in the next chapter, maybe Chapter 3 onwards? Well, this is Slushie Addict signing out!


	2. Chapter 2

Hey guys, Slushie Addict here! Wow, I'm actually at my second chapter. I feel like I've accomplished something! Haha! Anyways, I wasn't sure whether I should do the review replies at the start or at the end but I'm just gonna go with the start! It's my first time doing this so I'm a little excited~

 **AKUltiWarrior: There aren't so many chapters cuz I'm swamped with revisions for my national exams in November! I have this idea in my noggin for a while though, which is why I'm gonna bust through as many chapters as possible before I have to get cracking on my studies! Thanks for following me, I'm happy that you like it enough to do so!**

 **Krulla Chief: Mucking about huh? Sorry if this one seems like mucking about, but I swear that info mentioned in this chapter will be used in future chapters! Like something affecting practice sessions, or something used to improve acting etc! (That's not a spoiler btw) I really hope that this story can help your sleep-deprived mind even it's just a little!**

Alrighty then, with that I don't own Heathers!

XXXXXX

"Wow V, you're looking good today!" Ram complimented Veronica, not for her clothes but for the fact that she didn't look like she was nuked out of bed. Veronica groaned out some intelligible response, still half-awake as she was forced out of bed by Pauline. "How did you get her out of bed anyways?"

"Simple, just give her a 'long live the king' push off the bed and she's up." Pauline shrugged, entering the house without waiting for Ram to invite her in. "Sawyer, come over here already!"

"... I'll murder you in your sleep later..." Veronica mumbled, barely audible enough for Ram to hear. Ram shuddered closing the door only for it to be jammed by a foot. He opened the door, revealing JD, Martha and Heather (Duke).

"Dreadful etiquette of ya Rammy boy. Who else is here besides Ronnie and Fleming?" JD asked, making his way in uninvited. Heather followed suit, leaving Martha at the doorway. In the room JD entered, Veronica and Fleming were with Kurt, all three enjoying a glass of 7-Up. "Aw c'mon, you guys can't start drinking without me!"

"I don't know about them, but I sure as hell didn't promise you that I won't drink without you gracing us your presence." Pauline smirked, gulping down her drink.

"Rooooonnie, Fleming's acting like a bitch again!" JD whined, pouting like a child who didn't get what he wanted for Christmas. Veronica and Kurt laughed, with Heather, who had just poured herself a glass, raised an eyebrow. Ram too, laughed from the hallway, apparently inviting Martha in beforehand.

"Oh Martha, I see that you brought Mr Cookie with you. Ms Sandy's waiting for her beloved in my room." Ram said upon eyeing a cookie plush Martha was hugging. Martha giggled, she remembered the times she had came over to Ram's house and conduct mock weddings between Mr Cookie and Ms Sandy, a sandwich plush. "It's their what, 11th year anniversary?"

"12th. It's their 12th this year."

"Oh yeah, I remember now. You can leave Mr Cookie in my room if you're afraid of him getting roughed up by us later in the day." Ram suggested, which Martha acted on his suggestion. "Don't go into my sister's room! She's gonna kill me if anyone apart from her enters it!"

"Too late! Wow, there are a lot of pentagrams on her wall in red paint!" Martha shouted from the second level, where all the bedrooms were located. This had resulted in the rest to face Ram in a mix of shock and horror, except for Kurt who was drinking from the bottle itself. "She's not in some cult right?"

"... Those are just decos from some band that she likes." Ram sighed, explaining the suspicious pentagrams in his sister's room. "And no, she's not in a cult."

"How would you know? She could be in one without you guys realising it." Pauline asked, with JD and Veronica nodding along.

"Because she's an atheist...?" Ram continued, not convincing any of the three. "Okay whatever, unless our family appears in the papers, she's not in some creepy cult."

"I suppose that would be a reasonable way to shut down such concerns." Heather commented, playing with her lime-green PS Vita. "Pyscho-Pass's pretty fucked up, good thing Heather isn't here to see me play."

"Which one? There are three Heathers in senior year alone and possibly many more in other grades." Veronica asked, peering over Heather's shoulder. "Huh, I didn't know you like anime games."

"What, you think I'm just a volleyball player who likes to go shopping with her homies and serve some balls?" Heather asked, tilting her head back to meet Veronica's chestnut coloured eyes. Veronica blushed, not only had Heather startled her, but something about her misty grey eyes gave her butterflies in her stomach. "Veronica? You alright? You're turning beet-red."

"Y-Yeah, I'm cool. Hey Heather, I'm just curious but... I heard that you're mixed, is that true?" Heather eyed Veronica in surprise, but nonetheless indulged Veronica with the answer.

"That's right, my mom's Asian. People are always shocked when they hear she's Asian, cause if that was the case then I should have brown eyes. Grey eyes are recessive after all."

"So that means your father is the one who has that recessive trait?"

"Hmm... I guess? Genetics are fucked up sometimes." Heather continued, letting out a hollow laugh for some reason. Veronica didn't know why, but she sensed that Heather wasn't so eager to talk about her parents. Heather was well-known throughout Westerburg for her sunny disposition, so seeing or hearing something that didn't sound as sunny as she portrayed herself to be was a clear sign that it was getting cloudy around her.

"Speaking of colours, you sure like green a lot. Green handkie, green ribbon in your hair, even your console's green!" Veronica pointed out, which made Heather's cheek turn red. "Aw, you're cute when you blush."

"Hey, don't tease me..." Heather grinned, along with JD who was observing he exchange between the two girls the whole time.

"They're so fucking cute, I'm _so_ tempted to shove 'em in a closet so that they'll make out or something." JD commented, resulting in an unanimous agreement except for one person. "What's with that look Fleming?"

"Just like how Rome isn't built in a day, romance can't happen within seven minutes!" Pauline shot back, glaring at JD. JD shrugged, not bothered by Pauline's concerns.

"Speaking of seven minutes, we're gonna play 'Seven Minutes in Heaven' later. Well, according to the list of games Allen-man gave us." Ram commented, holding up a scrap of paper. Pauline, JD and Martha warily stared at the paper, Kurt was setting up Ram's PS4, and lastly Veronica and Heather were too busy 'flirting' with each other to hear Ram. "Okay okay if you dudes ain't gonna believe me, then here, Allen-man was kind enough to give us a physical copy of the activities."

"Thank you Sweeney. Now let's see here..." JD and Martha gathered around Pauline, reading the contents of the letter.

 _[Hey Ram, below are the activities that I want you guys to do. Remember to record the whole party, or I'll force you guys to sleep under the stars._

 _-introductions (enough to create a bio)_

 _-fun_

 _-lunch_

 _-more fun_

 _-dinner_

 _-watch musical (broadway)_

 _-strip poker_

 _-seven minutes in heaven (must be after poker and cannot wear back clothes NO MATTER WHAT)_

 _-scary stories_

 _-sleep_

 _I don't give a shit what you guys do, just keep it kid friendly as the principal is seeing this._

 _Signed, Al]_

"Wow, what a dick." JD said, smirking at Veronica and Heather. "I'm gonna make sure those two get laid tonight!"

"Dean! Stop thinking with your penis!"

XXXXXX

"Urgh, why the fuck are those two Heathers not here yet?! What the fuck are they trying to do, sleep?!" Veronica grumbled, her fingers furiously mashing on the buttons of a PS4 controller. "Kurt, stop bloody cheating!"

"I'm not dude! You just suck big time at this!" Kurt replied back, his character blasting Veronica's with a blast of energy. "Kamehameha bitch!"

"Fucking shit- your player is too OP!"

"Not my fault you can't dodge a simple Kamehameha!" The seven of them were currently waiting for the remaining Heathers to arrive, unfortunately for them it had already been two whole hours and both Heathers were uncontactable. Thankfully for them, Veronica, who was the most short-tempered person after Heather, was entertained with Kurt sacrificing himself to be the one to entertain her. JD and Martha were in the kitchen ransacking the fridge while Pauline was sent out to buy 'party food', which included chips, sodas, and marshmallows. Ram was looking up his social media feed, while Heather was lounging on the sofa with the other two gamers.

"Motherfu-" Before Veronica could finish, the doorbell rang once. Then twice, and before any of them knew it, it turned into an endless string of ringing. "Can someone get the fucking door?! It's throwing me off my- oh hell no not a super Kamehameha!"

"Coming!" Ram got up since he was closest to the door and upon opening it, he was soon falling backwards. At the doorway stood Heather, while resting on top of Ram was Heather. Heather quickly entered the house, slamming the door shut and proceeding to lock it with all six door locks. "What the fuck Mac?!"

"It was fucking hard for me to get away from my piano lessons! That already costed me an hour, and to top it all off, I caught Heather here trying to sneak out of the house through the window _without_ a rope! It took her an hour to get out without her parents knowing, and I don't want any of her neighbours catching us and bitching it to Mr Chandler! Do you know how much he hates me?!" Heather (McNamara) hastily explained, her breathing ragged from running. The other Heather got up and checked Heather's fingers, a small smile appearing on her face upon confirming that the fingers were unharmed. "Thanks Heather. Next time, get some tips from Veronica on how to escape your house without getting detected."

"Why me bitch?!" Veronica yelled from the sofa, her character now against Heather (Duke)'s. "No no no NO! NOT FINAL SHINE ATTACK!"

"Veronica, why are you overreacting? It's better than a Final Flash from yours truly." Heather (Duke) teased, executing the attack that Veronica dreaded so much. "Okay, battle's over! We have to get started on the recording, right Ram?"

"Hey- don't just ditch a match and call it quits Heather!" Veronica started, throwing her controller on to the sofa. "Heather, listen to me!"

"Lalalalalalala can't hear a damn thing!" Heather covered her ears, pretending to not hear Veronica. "Didn't you two tell your parents about this?"

"Feh, those two asshats won't lemme go out. They said something along the lines of them not wanting to ruin myself further at an orgy. Like, I've never _been_ to one!" Heather (McNamara) scoffed, pulling Heather (Chandler) closer. "Her, on the other hand, wasn't allowed to leave the house because they didn't know our ancestral histories. Like, I don't even know mine!"

"Who would fucking know?! Oh wait, maybe Mrs Horndog does." JD chuckled, the name never failed to make his day. It was simply too hilarious. "Hey Rammy boy! We can now start the recording right?"

"It's... already on. We've left it running ever since we woke up." Ram replied, gesturing to him and Kurt. Kurt made a 'what the fuck' face, Martha gulped in horror, JD, along with Heather, simply shrugged and Veronica... well, at least she wasn't trying to make her mark in the list of top sources of noise pollution.

"I'll fucking murder you in your sleep later too, right after Pauline." Veronica seethed, glaring at Ram. The effect was soon ruined by frantic knowing coming outside the door, courtesy of Pauline who was forced to run errands.

"Hello?! Can someone open the damn door?! It's boiling out here!"

XXXXXX

"Okay then! Now that we've gotten Pauline in, we should start with the intros!" Ram said, gesturing for the rest to sit in a circle on the floor. Heather and Pauline scoffed, but nonetheless complied.

"You do fucking realise that we all know each other right? This is fucking stupid." Heather asked, hurling a cushion at the video camera that was recording their every action. Pauline, Veronica and JD nodded along in agreement, while Heather, Heather, Kurt and Martha simply smiled. Ram sighed loudly, pinching his nasal bridge as though he was stressed.

"Mac, you know I love you right? As much as I just want to skip this thing, we _can't_. Allen-man said that he wants to see the in the recording, so we have to do it." Heather muttered a few swear words under her breath, expanding both Martha's and Heather (Chandler)'s vocabulary. "Okay, so who's gonna start first."

"Why don't we do the 'not it' thing since none of us are keen to start?" Martha suggested, trying her very best to forget Heather's swearing. She may be terrible with English, but she certainly didn't need to expand her vocabulary of rude words. The other eight thankfully agreed to her suggestion, waiting for Martha to start. "Okay on the count of three... one..." She held up a finger, then two then...

"NOT IT!" Martha blinked, she was still displaying two fingers. Only Heather (Chandler) and Veronica noticed, with the latter chuckling.

"Hey guys, Martha still hasn't counted to three yet." Veronica pointed out, resisting the urge to tease Pauline, who was visibly irritated. "Oh look, Pauline's gonna whine, whine, whine all night!"

"You don't deserve to live Sawyer!" Pauline shot back, flipping her middle finger at said target. "Dunnstock! Do it properly!"

"Alright alright! And..." Martha held up a third finger, with the rest shouting 'not it' again.

"NOT IT!" All eyes turned to face JD, who groaned in defeat.

"Okay okay, fine. I'll start. Sheesh, I didn't hear that Heather saying anything." JD glanced at Heather, her baby-blue eyes averting away from JD's chocolate brown eyes. "So uh, I'm Jason Dean, but I prefer to be called JD. Uh... Hey Rammy boy! What constitutes a bio?"

"Um. Good question. Any of your phones are with you and not charging at the charging point over there?" Ram asked, referring to the numerous phones surrounding the charging point. Heather (McNamara) pulled out her phone and tossed it to Ram, who barely caught it. "Mac! You know I have butter fingers!"

"You're a linebacker, start getting used to things thrown your way." Heather replied, leaning on Heather (Duke). "It's unlocked."

"I can see that." Ram muttered, accessing the internet to look up what a bio was. "Ah here we go... what. Uh. You know what, this is too long for me to read and you guys to remember without a visual aid... so I'm just gonna go up and print enough copies for all nine of us."

"What the fuck? Urgh, why must Mr Allen make the intros so damn complicated?!" Pauline complained, getting up to use the bathroom. "Bathroom break for me."

"Have fun jacking off~" JD smirked, earning himself a well-placed slap on his right cheek from Pauline. "Oh c'mon! Don't tell me you've never jacked off before?"

"I have, but I willl not do such a thing at a host's house. And certainly not around you." Veronica wondered just what was the true relationship between her neighbour, and her only male best friend. Last week she had observed the two of them glaring at each other, a stark contrast from today's behaviour. Martha probably thought of the same observation, but knowing her, Veronica was sure that she would simply ignore it.

"I'm not really surprised that she rubs herself once in a while, she seems to be brought up normally..." Heather (Duke) muttered, pushing Heather (McNamara) off her. "Heather, lean on Heather instead."

"Hather looks like she'll break if I do Heather."

"That's cause you're fat. And short. And fat." Heather (Duke) replied, scooting away from her conversational partner. "You're certainly no Heather McNamara."

"Fuck off Heather. Some cheerleaders can be short and fat, so don't go dissing cheerleaders."

"You do realise that nobody on Westerburg's cheerleading team is fat right Heather?"

"Can it Heather!"

"Find a can for me first bitch!"

"Hey Heathers, how do you guys know which Heather are you referring to when speaking?" Veronica asked the one question that weighed on her mind. Martha, Kurt and JD nodded, agreeing with Veronica. Heather (Chandler), who wasn't involved in the conversation, perked up, turning to Heather (McNamara).

"Uh... Actually, we don't really know. We just kinda guess from the way we speak to each other. Like Heather and I will usually diss each other but when it comes to Heather... we usually treat her like a decent human being." Heather (McNamara) explained, turning to Heather (Duke). "Right Heather?"

"I've been meaning to say this... but maybe we should just address each other by our family names? I mean, I don't usually know which Heather Heather is referring when she speaks." Heather (Duke) said, pointing to Heather (Chandler).

"This sounds like a fucking tongue twister..." Veronica groaned, her head starting to hurt.

"You mean like 'Heather told Heather that Heather was a mega bitch but Heather knew that Heather was no angel as compared to Heather who felt that Heather was not a bitch'?" JD asked, making up a tongue twister immediately.

"JD, that's not a tongue twister. That's just plain confusing."

XXXXXX

"Okay dudes! I've printed out the bios!" Ram announced, coming down the stairs with nine freshly printed copies of the bio he found online. "Everyone take one and fill in everything, once you're done place it in the centre of the circle. We'll start showing 'em on my visualiser once all of us are done."

"I can't believe we're doing this..." Heather McNamara groaned, staring at the paper. "What the flying fuck is this?"

"Trust me Mac, I edited quite a lot of it from the original source. Besides, the point of today's party is to satisfy Allen-man!" Ram replied, handing out pens to everyone. She gave him a pointed look, gesturing to him that their gathering that day was not the definition of a party. "Hey c'mon, party's just two syllables. Gathering's three syllables. Just... just do the fucking thing."

"This is a fucking waste of time and brain cells." Heather (McNamara) sighed, complying with the instructions given. After an hour, the last character bio was submitted. She couldn't care less really, she didn't see the point of coming up with a character bio when they already knew each other. "Hey Ram, can we start yet? I wanna fucking sleep."

"It's 10.30 am." Pauline said in a manner-of-fact tone, irking the blonde.

"What's your damage bitch?" At this point, some were worried that a fight would break out between the two girls. That didn't have any fruition for Ram had slipped the first bio underneath the visualiser, with the projector displaying an enlarged version of it on the screen.

 ** _[Name: Kurt Kelly_**  
 ** _Age: 17  
Birthday: 16 January  
Height: 186 cm  
Weight: 68 kg  
Race: White? That's a race right?  
Talents/Skills: I don't know, able to have a slam dunk five times in a row in basketball?  
Sibling(s): 3  
Hobbies: Sports, games  
Strength(s): I'm good for carrying stuff?  
Weakness(es): People say that I'm dumb, so maybe intelligence level?  
_ _Like(s): Sports and dogs!  
_ _Dislike(s): Cherry tomatoes]_**

"So lemme get this straight. You can only slam dunk five times in a row in a game... does that mean you can't slam dunk afterwards?" JD asked Kurt, who scratched his chin in thought.

"Not really? I mean, five in a row is kinda awesome right?" Kurt replied, prompting Ram to move on to the next bio. "Actually, what's the diff between talents and strengths?"

"No clue bro, but I'm just gonna guess strengths as qualities such as honesty." Ram replied, shrugging at the question.

 ** _[Name: Pauline Fleming_**  
 ** _Age: 15  
Birthday: 1 April (try to prank me on that day and I'll ensure you'll wish you were never born!)  
Height: 1.59m  
Weight: 47 kg  
Race: White  
Talents/Skills: First-aid  
Sibling(s): 1  
Hobbies: Reading, arguing with Dean between Big Gulp and Slurpees (Slurpees are no.1)  
Strength(s): Reliable, responsible, hardworking, born leader (according to all of the teachers in my life)  
Weakness(es): Most probably stubbornness  
Likes: Slurpees  
Dislikes: Peanut butter, cats, dogs]_**

"Are you serious Pauline? You actually listed arguing with JD over drinks as a hobby?" Veronica asked, both amazed and in awe of how different people perceived things differently. Pauline nodded, not seeing a problem with hers.

"I'm more concerned with the fact that people will use my birthday as an excuse to prank me. I got myself pied by some jackass two years ago on my birthday!"

"To be fair, your birthday's also April Fool's Day..." Ram said, moving on to the third and cutting himself on the finger. "Ow!"

 ** _[Name: Jason 'JD' Dean_**  
 ** _Age: 17  
Birthday: 11 July  
Height: 173 cm  
Weight: 56 kg  
Race: White  
Talents/Skills: I'm great at gymnastics and forging stuff!  
Sibling(s): 0  
Hobbies: Gymnastics, __arguing with Fleming between Big Gulp and slushies (obviously Big Gulp is the best)_ _  
Strength(s): Flexibility?  
Weakness(es): I can't gain weight for some reason...  
Like(s): Soda!  
Dislike(s): Cold semisolids/solids]_**

"I think I just became public enemy number one among the women huh?" JD grinned, aware that his inability to gain weight was something women desperately sought for. Heather (McNamara) gave him the middle finger while Martha sighed wistfully.

"Well I just find it funny that your birthday is on the same day as free Slurpee day in 7-11 stores." Pauline added, making JD grumble. "Oh come on you big baby, you hate Slurpees solely because your teeth hurt if they touch anything cold!"

 ** _[Name: Martha Dunnstock_**  
 ** _Age: 17  
Birthday: 8 November  
Height: 156 cm  
Weight: I've stopped weighing myself after I hit 80 kg 3 years back...  
Race: White  
Talents/Skills: Cooking?  
Sibling(s): 0  
Hobbies: Cooking, movie nights with Veronica, origami_ _  
Strength(s): I can be used as a shield against bullies?  
Weakness(es): I gain weight easily  
Like(s): Disney movies, sea breeze  
Dislike(s): Dentists]_**

"Oh that's right, you hated going to the dentist..." Veronica muttered, with Ram nodding along as he took the next piece of paper to place under the visualiser.

 ** _[Name: Heather Duke_**  
 ** _Age: 17  
Birthday: 14 February  
Height: 1.66 m  
Weight: 52 kg?  
Race: British-Asian, I was born in UK but came here in third grade  
Talents/Skills: Gaming  
Sibling(s): 0  
Hobbies: Gaming, reading, cosplay, volleyball_ _  
Strength(s): I can serve a good ball?  
Weakness(es): Mac tells me that I'm too easy-going and should start saying no more often  
Like(s): Games, anime, green, pudding, chocolate  
Dislike(s): Anything that doesn't have either two or four legs (not including amputees)]_**

"So... you're not good with insects?" Ram asked Heather (Duke), glancing at the dislike portion of the bio. "Is there really a need to clarify your dislike though? I mean, you can just write insects.."

"That's because I have severe arachnophobia, and those... _things_ have eight. Also in middle school, I wrote that down without the clarification and I got sent to detention for 'not being considerate towards those with physical disabilities'." Heather (Duke) replied, holding up her fingers to quote the comment written in her detention slip. "And the one person in the room at that time who had a disability felt that I shouldn't have gotten detention!"

"Yeah I mean, she's clearly thinking that people with disability are not normal. She's the one who needs that detention." Heather (McNamara) agreed, pulling down her right sleeve and removing the white glove covering her right hand, revealing a prosthetic forearm. "Seriously, I'm still pretty pissed at that fucking bitch."

"How is it that I've never known you have a prosthetic arm until today?" Ram asked, placing another bio under the visualiser. "Maybe Allen-man had a point with this party..."

 ** _[Name: Heather McNamara_**  
 ** _Age: 17  
Birthday: 28 September  
Height: 1.57 m  
Weight: 63 kg  
Race: Can't you tell that I'm fucking white you assholes?!  
Talents/Skills: Swearing in at least 5 languages  
Sibling(s): 0  
Hobbies: Comic strips, giving people a well-deserved right hook, playing piano_ _  
Strength(s): Fucking up my relationship with my folks, pissing everyone, swearing, graffiti, playing piano  
Weakness(es): Duke says that I should learn how to mute my swearing, yeah right bitch  
Like(s): Yellow, Chandler, Duke, comics, alcohol  
Dislike(s): Anybody trying to fuck with me or my friends, people who try to diss me when they know I'm not born with a right forearm]_**

"McNamara, you do realise that Mr Allen is using this as an opportunity to see who are the problematic students in this group?" Pauline asked, her eyes focused on the word 'alcohol'. "That being said, any recipes for an alcoholic Slurpee?"

"Pauline! You're supposed to be the student council president!" Veronica chided, with Pauline shrugging. "Aren't you proud of your position?!"

"Well yes that's true, but I love Slurpees even more." Pauline replied, not the least concerned of her being underage to drink. "Besides, this is Ohio. You can drink alcohol in the privacy of our homes."

"I am in _love_ with that prude bitch." Heather (McNamara) declared, which for some reason made Heather (Chandler) frown with disappointment. Veronica noticed this, and assumed that Heather (Chandler) didn't like the term used to describe Pauline.

 _'Huh, so even Chandler can get uncomfortable with McNamara... I always thought that nothing could make her feel that way...'_ Veronica thought to herself while Ram shrugged at the declaration, taking another bio from the remaining stack.

 ** _[Name: Ram Sweeney_**  
 ** _Age: 17  
Birthday: 2 August  
Height: 191 cm  
Weight: 76 kg  
Race: White  
Talents/Skills: Making straight guys gay for me (according to Kurt that is)  
_ _Sibling(s): 1  
_ _Hobbies: Sports, shopping with the Heathers whenever they need to get something  
_ _Strength(s): Intimidation  
_ _Weakness(es): Asking the girl I'm dating on a first date  
_ _Like(s): Martha, Mr Cookie, Ms Sandy, playing chess  
_ _Dislike(s): NA]_**

"Remind me again why aren't you able to ask Martha on a date Rammy boy?" JD asked, aware that Martha and Ram were dating. It seemed that the news was not known to the Heathers, for they all turned to face him in shock.

"You're dating Martha?! Well fuck me gently with a chainsaw, why didn't you tell us?! I could have bought that toy couple you two have some present!"

"Mac, that's nice of you. Besides, I _did_ tell Chandler about it." Two pairs of eyes turned to face Heather Chandler, but she was nowhere to be seen. "Geez, maybe she thought I was joking or something... Oh well, I'll ask her about it later. Here's the next one."

 ** _[Name: Veronica Sawyer_**  
 ** _Age: 17  
Birthday: 25 December  
Height: 1.6 m  
Weight: 45 kg  
Race: White  
Talents/Skills: Lockpicking  
_ _Sibling(s): 0  
_ _Hobbies: Movie nights with Martha, reading, writing in my diary, playing video games with Kurt (and as of today, Duke)  
_ _Strength(s): Notetaking, lockpicking  
_ _Weakness(es): Short-temper  
_ _Like(s): Chocolate, popcorn, the smell of old books, ballpoint pens, astronomy  
_ _Dislike(s): Bitter/sour food, LIQUORICE!]_**

"Well, at least I know that I shouldn't give you any liquorice as a present." Heather (McNamara) said, pulling out a pack of salty liquorice from her bag. "Don't get me wrong, I hate these fucking things but my cousin's family loves to bring these over for Christmas. They're Finnish and they call it uh... salmiakki? Whatevs really, they taste fucking nasty."

"... I like liquorice." Heather (Chandler) whispered, reaching out for the pack in Heather (McNamara)'s hand. The latter obliged, handing the pack of sweets to Heather (Chandler). "They're good..."

"Ew. You're probably the only one among the nine of us that actually likes that crap." Ram shuddered, placing the final bio under visualiser. "Urgh, you even wrote here that you like liquorice..."

 ** _[Name: Heather Chandler_**  
 ** _Age: 17  
Birthday: 25 December  
Height: 184 cm  
Weight: 39 kg  
Race: White  
Talents/Skills: Hacking (please don't tell my parents!)  
_ _Sibling(s): 2  
_ _Hobbies: Shopping with Ram, watching plays/musicals  
_ _Strength(s): NA  
_ _Weakness(es): Everything but hacking, soft voice  
_ _Like(s): Liquorice, Scandinavian cuisine  
_ _Dislike(s): Naughty language]_**

"You weigh 39 kilos?! That's impossible!" Veronica said, inputting the values of Heather (Chandler)'s height and weight into a calculator she found on Ram's table. "Your BMI is 11.5! That's severely underweight!"

"Veronica, she's all skin and bones underneath her clothes. Literally." Heather (Duke) sighed, going over to Heather (Chandler) and lifting up her t-shirt, revealing her rib cage that was plain for all to see. "I mean, we're worried for her but we can't really do much to intervene..."

"Oh my god!" Pauline and Martha covered their eyes at the reveal, while the rest who weren't a Heather grimaced in horror.

"You're... are you anorexic?" JD asked, motioning for Heather (Duke) to release her grip on the t-shirt. Heather (Chandler) sadly shook her head, a small smile forming on her face. "... It's a complicated issue isn't it?"

"I'm glad you understand Jason." Heather (Chandler) murmured, pushing herself off from the floor. Veronica wanted to press the issue, but it didn't seem as though Heather (Chandler) was going to open up any time soon. "Ram, what's the next itinerary?"

"... Fun, like, literally just fun." Ram replied worriedly, holding up the piece of paper Mr Allen had given him. "After this is lunch, so I guess some of us are on cooking duty. As the host I'll be helping out with the cooking, but I kinda need a few more hands in the kitchen. Two should do."

"I'm volunteering myself and Fleming to help." JD raised his hand, while Pauline let out a small whine as she trudged into the kitchen before Ram or JD could say anything. "Wow! You're on auto!"

"... You know Heather- oh wait, can I call you by your family name instead?" Veronica started, but fumbled at the end. Heather (Chandler) nodded, prompting Veronica to continue. "Chandler, I don't know what complicated issues do you have that prevents you from gaining weight, but I'm here if you want an extra listening ear if the other Heathers are busy or something."

"T-Thank you Veronica. I appreciate the offer."

"Anytime." Veronica's eyes never left Heather (Chandler)'s figure, all she could think of was how severely underweight she was. _'Just what problems does she have that she couldn't tell us?'_

XXXXXX

"Hey Heather. You seem to know the reason why Chandler's so... um... light." Veronica started, her eyes trained on the television screen as she tried her hardest to beat Heather (Duke) at the previous game.

"She... doesn't want us talking about it. And you can all of us by our family name you know." Heather (Duke) replied, easily winning against Veronica. "Are you that worried about her weight?"

"Are you not?"

"... I am, but I can't do anything about it. The last time we tried to do something... it ended up with Mac accidentally settling Mr Chandler's moustache on fire during Thanksgiving three years ago."

"Should I ask how?"

"No, but ask me what happened to his facial hair."

"I think I can guess but okay fine, what happened to his facial hair after that incident?"

"Thanks to Mac, he's now permanently clean-shaven. Mrs Chandler gave both of us 100 dollars for making her husband 'handsome' according to her." Heather grinned, starting a new round with Veronica. "Mr Chandler on the other hand, wanted to murder the living shit outta Mac for destroying his masculinity."

"Hey, JD's unable to grow facial hair and he loves how it makes him look manly." Veronica chuckled, her fingers mashing on the controller's buttons. "Do you guys go over to her house to celebrate her birthday on Christmas?"

"Well I was invited last year but I declined as Mac was banned by Mr Chandler. So I celebrated it with Mac last year at her place, her parents are pretty nice."

"She hates them though."

"That's because they don't like her current lifestyle. She's a nice person though, and she refuses to smoke or abuse drugs. Kinda like a clean gangster."

"She drinks, that's what she said on her bio."

"Not as often as she wants you guys to think. She only drinks on holidays, and she bothers to ask her parents if she can drink."

"She's... surprisingly a good girl. And here I'm having a mental image of some rebel that can play the piano well."

"Well, that mental image of yours is true. She likes to rebel, but she'll ask her parents for permission for important things. Like drinking or punching the lights out of Mr Chandler. Did I tell you that Mr Chandler got a restraining order on her because of that right-hook?"

"Now you did." Veronica laughed, taking a second to glance at Heather (McNamara)'s prosthetic arm. "Was she born without her right arm?"

"Yup. She says it's better than losing it later on, then she would have lesser experience in controlling it. She's hoping for a waterproof one though, she doesn't like placing a protective cover on hers."

"Huh. Her prosthetic looks pretty expensive."

"It's the latest bionic prosthetic arm. Her parents got it when it came out."

"That's a waste, throwing her previous one away."

"Nah, she recycles it. She ensures that all of the recyclable parts in the prosthetic gets recycled while those that can't get sent to those who need 'em." Heather (McNamara), upon hearing about her prosthetic arm, stood up from her seat and walked over towards the duo. Veronica didn't notice her presence until a gloved hand covered her eyes.

"Hey! What gives?!" Veronica yelled, trying her best to slap the hand away but got herself injured instead. "Ow! What the fuck is that thing made of?!

"Things that can give some asshole a trip to the dentist." Heather (McNamara) replied, uncovering Veronica's eyes. "You suck at this game Veronica. Ever thought of fucking cheating?"

"No, cause cheating is for those who're afraid to lose." Veronica replied, losing to Heather (Duke). "Fuck!"

"Hey Duke, Veronica's asking you to fuck her now." Heather (Duke) rolled her eyes, flipping both middle fingers at the other Heather. "Don't show 'em to me, use 'em on Veronica here."

"Do you two only use sexual innuendos when Chandler isn't around?" The two Heathers thought for a while, then shook their heads in unison. "That's a surprise."

"I can assure you that Mac here doesn't."

"Since when we're on a family name basis?"

"Ever since today. Besides, even we have a hard time differentiating which Heather are we referring to. Hang on, didn't we have this conversation earlier?" Heather (Duke) pointed out, a fact that Heather (McNamara) had to agree. "Hey Mac, do you know what's for lunch?"

"I dunno. I'll go check." Heather (McNamara) disappeared into the kitchen, coming out in soot five seconds later. "Charcoal. We're having charcoal for lunch, and maybe for dinner too."

"Oh c'mon! It's not _that_ burnt!" JD yelled from the kitchen, coming out with a plate of black mass sitting on a plate. "It's just... a little overcooked!"

"I regret not volunteering myself to cook the meals." Martha commented, covering her eyes at the sight of the thing on the plate. "What _is_ that anyways?"

"I have no idea!"

"... Yeah I'm having big regrets..."

XXXXXX

"Yuck, I think your food just killed whatever's left of Chandler's taste buds." Heather (McNamara) said, gulping down numerous glasses of orange soda. Heather (Chandler) raised both her eyes, clearly surprised at being addressed by her family name. "We decided to just call each other that, are you cool with it?"

"O-Our friendship has levelled up!" Heather (Chandler) murmured excitedly, making those who weren't a Heather wonder just how did they base their name-calling on. "O-Oh and McNamara, my taste buds are perfectly healthy."

"Mac is fine Chandler. Anyways, she does have a point. Your favourite food are all downright nasty. Like liquorice, surstromming..." Heather (Duke) started to list all of the food that Heather (Chandler) likes to eat, mainly Scandinavian food that had an unpleasant smell. Pauline and Veronica scrunched their noses in disgust, while Kurt disappeared to vomit out whatever he had managed to ingest from lunch. "Did Kurt went to puke?"

"He did alright." JD replied, wincing as loud retching noises were heard from the bathroom. "Dude, gross much?!"

"Sorry dude...! They're gross as hell though-" More retching sounds could be heard from the bathroom, which made Ram pity his best friend.

"Disgusting food aside, we're gonna have a BBQ later so Pauline's on meat duty." Ram instructed, not receiving a positive reaction from said person.

"Again?! I just left the house to get you guys food which we've burnt two hours ago!" It was now 1 pm, and they were supposed to have 'fun' according to the list given. However, all nine of them were extremely bored and didn't want to go back and lounge around doing nothing. Pauline knew this, and decided to suggest some ideas to at least pass the time before she was forced out of the house to buy even more food. "You know, since we're all bored... let's play the team story game."

"What's that?" Kurt asked, a grin on JD's and Martha's faces. "Oh c'mon you guys, lemme in on the joke!"

"N-Nothing. Just that... well, Veronica always likes to end it by saying 'and that's the end of my story' whenever she's placed last." Martha said, wiping a tear from her eye.

"Yeah, Ronnie never changes."

"I can prove to you that I can change!" Veronica huffed, not the least pleased by their observations. "Pauline, who's gonna start?"

"Well, I guess in the order of how Ram showed us the bios before lunch. So it's Kelly, me, Dean, Dunnstock, Duke, McNamara, Sweeney, you and finally Chandler."

"Aw man, I think I hurled up my stomach..." Kurt groaned, wobbling down the stairs. "I heard what you guys just said, and yeah, I guess we can start?"

"Do you even know the rules?" Ram asked. Kurt nodded, coughing a second later. "Jesus bro, you need to get yourself checked."

"Okay so once upon a time... uh, there were three bitches." Kurt started, with Heather (McNamara) glaring at him. "W-What? Why are you glaring at me like that?"

"The first bitch liked oral sex and was straight, so she decided to specialise in sucking guys off." Veronica cringed, not liking the direction the story was starting to take.

"The second bitch was also straight but liked guys to stick their dicks into her lower holes, so she decided to charge rates for guys who wanted to stick their dicks into something."

"The third b-bitch was asexual, so she decided to go out with people, make them spend a ton of cash on her and then dump them." Martha wasn't comfortable with swearing, but apparently she had no problems coming up with a character that fitted the definition of a bitch.

"So uh, after sucking the dicks off many guys, she decided that she should work at a blowjob brothel."

"That was while the second bitch decided that fucking one guy at a time was not enough for her, so she started to accept two guys fucking her at a time."

"The third bitch was um... given a pamphlet for sexual diseases during one of her dates, and she showed it to the other two bitches."

"... The first said that it was impossible to get sexual diseases from oral while the second said that all those that she fucked were healthy."

"After a while, the first two died of HIV as a guy the first one sucked had his sexual fluids mixed with her bleeding lips while the second one had unwittingly allowed two infected men to infect her with the disease, leaving the last one alive until she decided to commit suicide after getting herself forcefully raped by one of her heartbroken ex." Heather (Chandler) concluded, stunning the other eight. "... Was it not a sentence?"

"Not that, your ending is very... disturbing. Even though it hits back home hard." Veronica answered, unable to believe that someone who disliked swearing had just described a very detailed and sad ending for all three bitches.

"Oh. I should have said that the third one wanted to prove her point and thus infected the first two with infected blood, courtesy of one of her playthings after all..." This comment scared everyone, including her two best friends. "McNamara? Why are you moving away from me?"

XXXXXX

"Hey JD, do you think Mr Allen is making us watch the Broadway version because the script is following theirs?" Veronica asked, fanning the flame engulfing the charcoal (which was in reality the lunch made by Ram, JD and Pauline earlier) used to grill their dinner. JD shrugged, setting up the plates on the table outside Ram's house. Heather (Chandler) and Heather (McNamara) were inside the kitchen washing the vegetables while Kurt was setting up the cups on the table. Heather (Duke) was inside the house hunting for the marshmallows and soda bottles while Martha was teaching Ram how to grill seafood properly due to the lack of meat in Ram's house on the other grill that was ready for grilling. Pauline was out shopping for meat, something that she hated. She had expressed that she was willing to do it if someone had accompanied her to the mall, but most of them refused. Those who had expressed their wish to help were unable to do so, with Heather (Chandler) being unable to carry anything more than five kilos, Heather (McNamara) being banned from buying meat for some reason and JD, who only agreed to help if Pauline admitted that Slurpees were second to Big Gulps. Needless to say, Pauline refused to admit it and decided that she's perfectly fine carrying the meat back to Ram's place.

"I thought it has to be kid friendly." JD said going over to Veronica and blew on the roaring flame. "Hey Ronnie, wanna cuddle before the fire?"

"You might as well ask me if I wanna roast s'mores." Veronica good-naturedly shot back, while JD grinned in response. "If that's the case then you better get your ass in gear and find the marshmallows before Duke gets to them."

"Too late." Heather (Duke) said, coming out of the house with a bag filled to the brim with marshmallow packs. "You think we can roast them now? It's been a while since I've eaten roasted marshies."

"No you can't!" Pauline gasped, lugging back at least 15 kilos worth of meat. "You guys better reimburse me for this! And finish them too!"

"We can always eat that for breakfast tomorrow." JD dismissed Pauline's concerns, continuing to blow on the fire. Heather handed the bag to Veronica, going over to help Pauline with the meat.

"Here, let me help. It's for not volunteering just now." Heather offered in an apologetic tone, with Pauline handing half of the weight to her. "You've brought this much back? Wow, you're stronger than you look."

"Thank you, where should we place it?" Pauline asked, following Heather's lead. They eventually placed it on the table JD had set up, occupying most of the table. "Hey Sweeney! You can take some meat to grill already!"

"Got it! Martha, handle the seafood while I attend to Pauline!" Ram said, running over to Pauline. Heather decided that she should check up on the other two Heathers, at the same time enjoying the air-conditioning. She picked up the video camera that was brought out by Ram and entered the kitchen by the front door, only to be met with the sight of a flooding kitchen.

"What did you guys do?!" Heather (Chandler) started to cry, while Heather (McNamara) tried her best to plug the tap. It didn't work, though it was most likely due to the fact that she broke the tap instead. "Oh my god Mac! You just broke the fucking tap!"

"I-It's not my fault that it refused to turn itself off after we tried to close it!" Heather (McNamara) defended, ransacking the kitchen for a roll of kitchen towels. She then handed to Heather (Chandler), who used it to dry her tears. "Duke, get that thing you're holding out of the kitchen!"

"O-Okay!" Heather (Duke) nodded, but slipped at the doorway. The video camera landed on her nose afterwards, causing her to have a nosebleed. "O-Ow..."

"Oh shit! Are you alright Duke?!"

"I-I don't know... I'm seeing stars... Oh hey, I think that's Orion..." Heather (Duke) mumbled, starting to lose consciousness.

"This is really bad, Duke's blocking the exit. Chandler, can you open the window? We can call for help if it's open." Heather (McNamara) ordered the other Heather as she went to check up on the video camera, which was surprisingly still not broken despite being submerged in water. Heather (Chandler) grunted as she tried to open the window, but her efforts proved useless. "How's that window?"

"U-Um... I think it's rusted shut." Heather (Chandler) pointed to the window, which had a very thick brown layer surrounding the only window. Heather (McNamara) groaned in frustration, grabbing a wrench they had found in one of the kitchen drawers when they first experienced problems with the tap and hurled it at the window, shattering it to millions of pieces.

"Okay, it's broken. You go out and get help while I try to keep Duke alive." Heather (Chandler) nodded, cutting her left leg on a broken shard of the window as she fell out of the kitchen with a soft thud. "Jesus, this is a fucking comedy series."

"... I know..." Heather (Duke) groaned back, blood still flowing out from her nose.

XXXXXX

"Is your nose okay?" Veronica asked Heather (Duke), who was lying on the sofa while the rest sat on the floor so that Heather could rest on the sofa. "What did the doctor say?"

"Broken nose. Healing time's two weeks." Heather replied, glaring at the video camera. "Stupid camera..."

"I'm just glad you didn't hurt yourself elsewhere. You suffered a pretty nasty fall after all." Veronica continued, loosely holding on to Heather's left hand. "Just rest okay?"

"Veronica, I'm super grateful you're worried about me, but it's just my nose. I can still watch with you guys."

"I'm not taking any risks." JD chuckled at how overprotective Veronica was towards Heather, while Pauline jabbed him in the ribs to get him to shut up.

"Okay, I found the musical! Now let's watch it!" Ram announced, playing the musical for everyone to see. Veronica noted how the musical focused so much on stage lighting, directions, and how expressive the performers were, from the main cast to even the background characters closest to the edge of the stage. It made her wonder if a high school with only six months to prepare could even pull off a decent performance, but the returning grip from Heather's hand told her that it was probably possible. If they don't fuck it up first that is.

"Veronicaaaaa. Can I at least sit up?" Heather asked, propping herself up regardless.

"You're already up, I'm not gonna push you back down." Veronica replied, mesmerised by how the actress playing Veronica had so much emotion in 'Beautiful'. "This song really captures the students' teenage angst. To think that it means nothing ten years down the road, but it's practically their lives at our age."

"Yeah, I love the part of how it excludes JD throughout the song. He's really the one who has teen angst, with his mom dying and an emotionally-detached dad." Heather agreed, still holding on to Veronica's hand. "McNamara too, but I'm thinking that hers started after JD tried to solve Veronica's problems."

"It would be fucking romantic if he didn't add a body count to it."

"C'mon Ronnie, people died for _you_. That's plenty romantic." JD replied, grabbing some popcorn from the bowl Heather (Chandler) was holding on to.

"If you actually had the same mindset as him, I would have called the cops the second you introduced yourself to me in sophomore year." Veronica replied, her eyes still on the screen. It was now at the part where the three Heathers entered the cafeteria, and Veronica was introducing each of them. "Was getting breast implants even safe during late 80s?"

"Who knows. By the way Duke, when did you stop wearing push-up bras?" Heather (McNamara) asked an embarrassed Heather (Duke), who was tightening her grip on Veronica's hand. "And since we're on this topic, Duke's an AA!"

"Mac! You don't have to announce to the whole world that I'm a runway!" Heather (Duke) hissed. Many of them blushed, with one Veronica blushing due to lewd thoughts of a naked Heather Duke flooding her mind. "Chandler, tell me why the fuck are you a B cup when you're basically skin and bones?!"

"I-I... I don't know... but they're heavy to me..." Heather (Chandler) replied, cupping her chest. "M-McNamara's are way bigger than mine though..."

"I've always assumed that her sweater puppies were due to her being such a fatass." Heather (Duke) answered, glancing at Martha. "Shit. Sorry Martha, I'm not saying anything about you! Really! I'm just dissing Mac!"

"Offence not taken." Martha replied, staring at Heather (McNamara)'s chest then at her own. "I think our size is proportionate to our bust sizes... minus Heather Chandler's."

"Oh fuck off Martha, yours is like a F. I'm only a D!"

"You girls, shut the fuck up. We're trying to watch here. And for the record, it doesn't matter what the fuck your boob sizes are, they're all going to sag when we become old hags anyway." Pauline hissed, effectively shutting down the conversation. They watched past Veronica's first conversation with JD and were now at Ram's homecoming party, playing the scene where Kurt hoisted Heather (Chandler) up and mimed sexual intercourse while Heather (McNamara) was grinding Ram as he lifted her leg up. "I personally like the part where Duke comes up to Sweeney and interrupts his make-out session with McNamara."

"Dude, at least address them by their first names. I feel all weirded out thinking about grinding against Mac." Ram shuddered, glancing at an irritated Heather (McNamara). "I mean that she made it sound like I want to fuck you, which I clearly don't cause I'm only into Martha?"

"Yeah, and I'm irritated at the fact that Kurt's the one who get to mime sex with Chandler! Like hello, he's dating me in the musical! Shouldn't he do that with me?!" Heather (McNamara) huffed, while Heather (Chandler) pouted.

"... It would be nice if I'm the one you're grinding against..." Heather (Chandler) mumbled, loud enough for only JD to hear. JD grinned, his mind filled with all of the lesbian couples he could ship. Fast forward 15 minutes and they were now watching Heather (Chandler)'s 'suicide', with Veronica freaking out over how she had given Heather drain cleaner as a hangover drink.

"I always find it stupid. How the fuck was she not able to tell that the drink is drain cleaner?! Like, it's fucking blue in the movie!" JD exclaimed, throwing up his hands as JD tried to provide ideas for the suicide note. "God, Heather's such a pillowcase!"

"And drain cleaners have a strong smell too, so she should be able to identify it instead of drinking it." Heather (Duke) commented, scaring Veronica and a few others on her knowledge of drain cleaners. "Before anyone asks, no I haven't tried committing suicide via drinking it. If I wanted to commit suicide, I would either overdose on medicine like Mac in the musical or place my slit wrists in a bathtub full of water."

"... Oh my god." The other eight turned around to face Heather (Duke) as though she had just said that she would nuke the world in a week.

"What?" Heather asked, getting uncomfortable with the staring. "Ooh, popcorn. Mind if I have some?"

XXXXXX

"Okay, we're done with strip poker. Now what?" Heather (McNamara) asked, reaching out for her skirt but was slapped away by Ram. "What gives Ram?!"

"The list says that we have to play 'Seven Minutes in Heaven' like this." Ram answered, shivering in his underwear. "I-I'm so fucking cold."

"Wanna turn up the aircon?" Veronica offered, reaching out for the remote.

"T-Thanks V." Ram nodded, his shivering stopping after the air conditioner's temperature was dialled up. "Oh god, I feel like I'm at the North Pole..."

"It's a bit hot though... Veronica, what's the temperature?" Heather (Duke) muttered, unbuttoning her vest. "Am I allowed to remove my vest?"

"Nope. Why did you come wearing that anyways?" Ram asked, curious to know why was Heather wearing a white shirt, green vest and a black skirt on a cold Autumn day.

"Because it's fucking hot compared to the UK around this time? Can we at least sleep with the air conditioning switched on later?" Heather (Duke) replied, tugging on her collar. "Okay fine, can I at least also undo the first two buttons on my shirt?"

"S-Sure. Oh and the temperature is now at 25 degrees Celsius." Veronica replied, taking a look at the fallen clothes on the floor. There was JD's signature hoodie and his grey t-shirt, Martha's pants, Pauline's cardigan and skirt, Ram's singlet and shorts, Heather (McNamara)'s skirt and ribbon used to tie around her neck, and finally Heather (Chandler)'s... everything. Truthfully, they all had a part to play in making Heather Chandler nude, they didn't bother to ask whether she knew how to play poker and only found out that she didn't even know which card was which after she had lost her final pair of garments. "Uh, can Chandler at least put something on? We have to make the video kid-friendly right?"

"... I get the feeling that Allen-man _wants_ us to get into trouble with the principal." Ram groaned, handing the list over to Veronica. "Chandler, no offence but you look like a fucking Jew during the Holocaust."

"T-That's what the nurse tells me every time we have to go for health screenings..." Heather (Chandler) replied, covering her pubic regions. "She told me to eat more and laze around in bed every day doing nothing."

"That sounds nice. She told me to eat less and start exercising with Duke, both which will kill me." Heather (McNamara) replied, throwing her skirt at Heather (Chandler). "Here, hold this up to cover your pussy whenever you wanna walk around."

"Okay, room's set up! They're nine of us, who's not going to go in?" Kurt entered the room where the five of them were in, with Pauline following behind. "Or we have two rounds?"

"One person can choose whoever he or she wants to go in with." Ram replied, exiting the room he was in. The Heathers followed suit, leaving Veronica behind with Kurt.

"Hey Veronica, wanna pull a prank?" Kurt asked, holding up Ram's shorts. Veronica shrugged, switching off the air conditioning now that no one was in the room save for herself and Kurt. "Let's stuff these clothes in the fridge."

"Dude, that's disgusting."

"Well, there's nothing in the fridge since we used it to freeze the water in the kitchen..." Kurt muttered, referring to the broken tap in the kitchen. "So Veronica, you in?"

"... Fine, but I'm blaming it on you when they find out." Veronica sighed as she picked up the rest of the clothes and followed Kurt into the kitchen, where they proceeded to stuff the clothes into the fridge.

XXXXXX

"Uh, what the hell are you doing to Chandler?" Veronica asked JD, who was busy raising Heather (Chandler)'s leg. "Whatever it is, keep it kid friendly. And away from the other two Heathers' eyes."

"She asked me to help her be more flexible, so I'm helping to stretch her legs." JD replied, slowly pushing the leg forward. "She said that according to the choreography of the musical, she had to be flexible in 'Candy Store'."

"Oh, you mean the part about screwing guys right? Fair point I guess." Veronica admitted, her attention now on the closet they were using for the game. "JD, who's inside the closet now?"

"I dunno Ronnie, ask Rammy boy." Veronica nodded, going over to Ram, who was busy timing the pair inside the closet.

"Ram! Who's inside?"

"Duke and Mac. We're now placing bets to see if they come out with hickeys. For some reason none of them bet that those two would come out with hickeys." Ram responded, his stopwatch at the four minute mark. "You're paired up with JD by the way."

"You guys played without me?!"

"And Kurt. Besides, Chandler said that she wanted to choose who to go in with her later."

"Sooo... What are the pairings again?"

"You and JD, Martha and Kurt, me and Pauline, Duke and Mac, Chandler and someone."

"Okay... who's supposed to go after this?"

"You."

"Ah. So basically you want us to do a modern day version of 'Dead Girl Walking'?"

"I thought you're gay?" Ram knocked on the closet door, signalling the end of their time together. "Time's up! Haul your asses outta there! And make sure you clean up whatever mess you made in there!"

"What mess? We didn't do anything!" Heather (McNamara) shot back, coming out of the closet. Heather (Duke) followed, tugging on her collar still. "If Veronica was the one with Duke, then _maybe_ something hot and wet will happen."

"M-Mac!" Heather (Duke) blushed, punching Heather (McNamara)'s back. "Don't go saying stuff like that!"

"Oh come on, I heard it from JD. You two were flirting." JD grinned, unwittingly releasing his grip on Heather (Chandler)'s leg.

"Oops. Uh, anyways just keep stretching. I'm gonna go in with Ronnie." JD instructed Heather (Chandler), with the latter nodding and going up to Heather (McNamara). JD and Veronica entered the closet, with Ram starting the timer once the door was shut. "Sooo Ronnie, whaddya wanna do?"

"No idea really. Hey, when did Mr Zaly say practice starts?"

"I assume that it's every day until everything's over." JD chuckled, moving on to the next topic. "By the way Ronnie, you into Duke?"

"W-What makes you say that?!" Veronica sputtered, grateful that JD was unable to see her blushing face then. JD laughed a second time, slamming his fist on the floor.

"God, you're fun to tease. But really, you two hit off pretty well. Chandler told me that Duke doesn't really open up easily in her teens, so figured that your exchanges in the morning and afternoon said something."

"I didn't know that. We started to talk more after I asked her about some anime game she was playing on her gaming console."

"That so?" There was a lull in the conversation, one that JD soon filled up. "Well, if you actually like her in the long run, know that Fleming, Martha and I are rooting for ya."

"Oh come on, you told Pauline and Martha?!"

"No, Fleming was with me when you two were 'hitting off'." JD snickered, and while Veronica couldn't see it, she could tell that JD made quotation marks with his hands when he said 'hitting off'. "And Martha's low-key shipping you two together, so there's that."

"Pfft. Even if I do like her, I still have McNamara to go through. She's totally into Duke after all."

"Oh god, I hope it's not a fucking love triangle between the Heathers then. I can personally see Duke liking Chandler, she's pretty protective of her after all."

"What do you mean 'love triangle'?"

"Chandler likes Mac, completing the hypothetical love triangle. Like, that sheltered girl likes Mac enough to want to grind against one of her body parts."

"Please don't tell me she told you that."

"Nope, overheard her saying that to herself when watching the musical." Veronica nodded, wondering when was JD so invested into his friends' personal lives. "And hey, it's subtle, but she's been showing signs that she wants 'Mcdler' to be a thing."

"God, you suck at coming up with shipping names. Might as well say McDonald." Veronica laughed, and soon JD joined in just as Ram opened the closet door. "Oh Ram, that's fast."

"Seven minutes can feel like seven seconds when you're having fun. V, stay in there. Chandler wants to be with you." Ram replied, waiting for JD to exit the closet before allowing Heather (Chandler) to enter. "Chandler, are you sure you want V to be in there with you?"

"Y-Yeah. I think it's a nice time to just be ourselves and talk." Heather (Chandler) nodded, smiling after noticing jealous looks on Heather (McNamara)'s and Heather (Duke)'s faces. JD had noticed it, and realised that it wasn't mere coincidence that she chose Veronica of all people.

 _'Wow, Heather Chandler's not as innocent as we all thought eh?'_

XXXXXX

"I've come to the conclusion that we all suck at telling scary stories." Pauline commented, closing Ram's laptop. "We were desperate to read off Creepypasta stories for fuck's sake!"

"Fuck, can I add scary stories to my dislike list?" Kurt murmured, with Heather (Chandler) nodding along in agreement. JD scoffed, while Heather (Duke) nudged him lightly.

"JD, don't be insensitive. Don't tell me you weren't scared." Heather (Duke) asked, shaking her head after JD told her no. "I'm not going to believe you. There are some things in this world that can scare even the bravest people silly."

"What, you've been scared before? Don't tell me it was a little spi-" JD wasn't allowed to finish his words, getting himself slapped hard by Heather (Duke). "Ow?!"

"D-Don't ever say that word. Or the t-thing it makes. I'll murder you in your sleep if you ever say that to my face." JD numbly nodded, rubbing his sore cheek. Heather (Duke) trembled, something that Veronica hasn't seen before.

 _'So Duke's able to have snow too.'_ Veronica thought to herself, noting that Heather (Duke) really wasn't all sunny as how she usually was in school. "Anyways, let's just get some shut eye. We still have school tomorrow."

"Martha's already zonked out." Kurt pointed out, directing everyone's attention to Martha and Ram, both who were asleep. "And Ram too."

"It's only 11 pm though." Heather (McNamara) stated, getting up and making her way to the video camera. "Huh, this thing is still running beautifully. To think that it was hard enough to fuck up Duke's nose..."

"Don't remind me. The doctor told me I can't go for volleyball practice for two months!" Heather (Duke) groaned, getting up. "I'm gonna sleep in the guest room. The doctor also told me to sleep in an elevated position and I don't my nose is safe from you guys."

"T-To be fair, McNamara doesn't toss around much." Heather (Chandler) said, turning to face Veronica. "W-What about Veronica? Maybe she should sleep with you in case you need something in the middle of the night?"

"... Why not. Veronica, are you okay with this arrangement?" Veronica eagerly nodded, tripping over Heather (Chandler) in the process. "Ooh, that's gonna hurt."

"C-Chandler! Can you hear me?!"

"... Just some broken bones." Heather (Chandler) weakly replied, scaring those who were awake. "I-I'm lying! I-It was a quote from the musical!"

"It better be." Veronica sighed in relief, checking up on her just in case. "Oh thank god, you're right."

"S-See? A-Anyways, I'm going to sleep now. Good night Veronica, please take care of Duke for us." Veronica gave a firm nod, following Heather (Duke) out of the room (and watching her step this time). "Jason, could you move over? I think your leg is touching mine..."

"That's not me." JD responded, removing the blanket only to see a metallic forearm. "OH JESUS CHRIST!"

"It's just my arm JD." Heather (McNamara) responded, stopping the recording. "Looks cool right?"

"Personally, I think I'll have nightmares now thanks to you bitch."

"You're welcome asshole."

XXXXXX

Hey guys, Slushie Addict here! Man, this is a hella long chapter. I hope I won't write such long chapters ever again... And also, I hope that one day this fandom will be filled with tons of stories for us to enjoy! Oh wait, that's not the purpose of the A/N...? But really, this fandom is lacking in stories both from the movie version and the musical version... Which is why I want to contribute and spread the love! No wait, that sounds wrong. Ahaha, okay I better shut my trap here. Thanks for reading and your thoughts on the story are greatly welcomed!


	3. Chapter 3

Hey guys, Slushie Addict here! Uh... um... what _is_ an A/N about anyways? It's the third chapter, and I still don't get it. Well apart from replying your lovely reviews!

 **Krulla Chief: Ooh that was a joke? Well, joke or not, it's something that I do have to take into consideration! Can't keep mucking around to milk humour after all~ Besides, even dumb kids have their moments like what you said! Man, I'm going off the rail here! Anyhoo, I'll try not to take guilty pleasure the wrong way, hell all of us here have our own guilty pleasures! I'll keep going btw, writing pace will be slower than I want due to exams and shit, thanks for supporting me!**

Okay, reviews done! Now it's time for me to get a fucking brain freeze cause I have too much problems! Oh maybe I should go get a JD and learn from him! I don't own Heathers!

XXXXXX

"Oh fuck, my nose hurts like hell." Heather (Duke) groaned, following behind Heather (Chandler). They had just finished Biology classes and were on their way to Mr Allen's American Literature class. Heather (McNamara) would have tagged along with them if it weren't for the detention she was given right after school started proper. It wasn't even her fault really, but apparently the vice-principal assumed that she was guilty.

"A-Are you okay? Do you need to see the nurse?" Heather (Chandler) asked, her baby-blue eyes roaming about the hallway. She hugged herself tightly, conscious about her literal skeletal frame. Heather Duke shook her head, but didn't do much to ease Heather Chandler's worries. "I still think you should stay at home..."

"Chandler, I can't. I'll be missing two weeks of school. I'm already missing two _months_ of volleyball practice!"

"B-But still..."

"No buts. Anyways, do you really want to swap with Mac?" Heather (Duke) asked. Heather (Chandler) nodded, she had asked Heather (McNamara) if she was okay with swapping their roles in the musical, and thankfully she agreed. Now all she had to do was to raise this to Mr Allen, and everything should be solved. "Okay, not gonna stop you then. Just thought that you could fill the role well."

"Duke, you know I can't. I can't even imagine having... s-sleeping with guys before reaching the age of consent!"

"But you were able to fantasise about Mac grinding against you?" Heather (Chandler) audibly gasped, horrified to know that someone had actually heard her saying that last night. "Okay no, I wasn't the one who heard that from you. JD told me as he was grilling me if I like Veronica."

"Do you like her?"

"... We hit off."

"Jason thinks that you two are cute together."

"When are you two so chummy together?"

"S-Since the closet game?" Heather (Chandler) noticed Mr Allen up ahead, and decided to approach the matter to him first instead of after his lesson like what she had originally planned. "M-Mr Allen! May I talk to you about the musical?"

"Sure, shoot." Mr Allen replied, a smile on his lips as he waited for Heather to say what was on her mind.

"M-May I switch roles with McNamara? I've watched the musical online, and... well, I'm just not cut out for the role given. McNamara fits my role more!"

"Personality wise, yeah I'm gonna agree with you." Mr Allen started, but the way he replied Heather indicated that he wasn't done talking. "But no, I'm not going to switch you two."

"W-Why?" This had caught both Heathers by surprise, Mr Allen had agreed with the reason made by Heather (Chandler) yet he refused to switch. "Is it because of our names?"

"That's one reason, but not even half of it. The main reason is your height. You tower over almost everyone but Kurt and Ram, and according to the video, you're just two centimetres shorter than Kurt. Do you know that your height represents a symbol of your power in the musical? You height also serves to intimidate Veronica and Heather Duke, while making JD challenge against your authority." Mr Allen explained, looking up at Heather (Chandler). "You see, you tower over me."

"Well that's one way to put it, but if she can't get into the role to act, then what's the point of being tall?" Heather (Duke) asked, feeling Heather (Chandler)'s waist. "Since you've seen the video, I'm sure you're well aware that Chandler is also fucking underweight?"

"Even if I didn't ask you guys to record, the whole faculty is already acutely aware of her weight." Mr Allen sighed, pinching his nasal bridge. "Look, we can at worst force you into your role. But your physical traits are something we can't force, and we need them to send a subtle message to the audience."

"But-"

"I understand Mr Allen. Thank you for having faith in me." Heather (Chandler) interrupted Heather (Duke)'s protests, bowing slightly towards Mr Allen. "I'll inform McNamara that the arrangement will remain the same."

"Good. Now if you excuse me, I have a class to teach and you two are in it." Mr Allen entered the room, leaving the two Heathers alone.

"... Is this really what you want?" Heather (Duke) asked, turning to face her best friend. Heather (Chandler) nodded, her cracked lips doing their very best to smile. "Oh Jesus Christ, your lips are bleeding. Again!"

"M-Maybe it's time for me to buy more lip balm..." Heather muttered as she wiped te blood off her lips.

XXXXXX

"Hello Veronica and Martha. May I wait here with the both of you?" Heather (Chandler) asked, surprising said girls with her politeness. They were waiting for the rest to arrive for practice, and so far they were the only ones in the auditorium.

"Knock yourself out Chandler." Veronica was the one who accepted, with Martha smiling back as her response. "Where are the other two Heathers?"

"McNamara is still serving detention. Duke is... um... at the video game shop. A new game came out so she wanted to get it first thing." Heather (Chandler) replies, her tone dropping to a whisper afterwards. "U-Um, this sounds rather racist... but I heard that 99 percent of the background characters are... black?"

"Oh you know about it too? I asked Mr Allen, and he said something about us being white as a symbol of power and control and all that crap." Veronica sighed, opening a notebook and jotting down something. "Bullshit if you ask me."

"He said something similar when I requested to switch roles with McNamara."

"... I think Mac could learn a few things about being pure and all from her role." Veronica shrugged, with Heather (Chandler) raising her eyebrows in surprise. "What?"

"Nothing, just thought you'll be like the rest who knows about it. Personally, I think being suited for the role is what matters most in performing up on stage."

"That I have to agree. But this is high school, we have to make do with what we can, even if it means bullshitting some reason to convince doubters."

"You're really passionate about acting aren't you Veronica?" Martha spoke up, startling Veronica as she had forgotten her best friend's presence. "I'm glad I signed you up for auditions."

"Well _I'm_ glad JD signed _you_ up for auditions." Veronica shot back, grinning at Martha.

"Duke signed all three of us up for auditions. One of her reasons was for me, another was... well, she wanted to have a chance to talk to you." Heather (Chandler) shrugged, revealing how bony her shoulders were despite hidden under her thick clothing. "She's a really kind person, and she deserves someone to be there for her."

"Hey Veronica, she's low key shipping you and Duke together~" Martha laughed, earning herself a light chop to the head from Veronica. "Owie."

"Stop shipping us. How would you two like it if I ship you with other people?" Veronica asked, folding her arms. Martha and Heather (Chandler) stood in silence, but gave a response after a while.

"I don't mind. There's fan fiction on the musical after all. There's one featuring me and JD." Martha shrugged, not the least bit bothered by Veronica's empty threat.

"McNamara is a fan fiction author herself. She writes stories on the musical's... what do you call it? Fandom?" Heather (Chandler) replied, surprisingly not affected by Veronica's words. "She ships herself with Duke by the way. In the fandom that is."

"Good god, what the fuck is wrong with her?!"

XXXXXX

"All of you, strip." Mr Allen said to the main cast, his tired eyes glancing through them. "Except Duke. Your clothes are alright."

"What's wrong with our clothes?" Heather (McNamara) asked, looking down at her clothes. She was wearing a yellow crop top and a black skirt, completing her look with yellow stockings and black sneakers with yellow highlights.

"You're right. McNamara, remove your top and skirt. The rest is pretty much fine." Mr Allen continued, going towards Pauline. "Pauline, strip everything."

"The fuck?! No!" Pauline was wearing a maroon t-shirt with 'I'm busy fucking myself at work' in gold print. She wore a pair of skinny jeans and a pair of slip-ins, giving her a casual look.

"JD, lose the hoodie." Mr Allen said, referring to JD's signature hoodie. JD shook his head, not willing to remove his hoodie. "Ram and Kurt, change into something more sporty."

"Uh, I guess that's more reasonable than them..." The two jocks nodded, leaving the auditorium to change.

"Martha, wear more nerdy clothes. And make them ratty." Martha was wearing a pink sweater, orange t-shirt and sweatpants, making her look a little like a slob.

"N-Nerdy? What kind of clothes fall under that category?!" Martha asked, to which Mr Allen replied by giving Heather (Duke) a pointed look. "... That's awfully mean of you sir..."

"Offence taken. Martha, I think maybe you should get some unicorn pullovers. They're fucking cheap and easy to find." Heather (Duke) replied, glaring at Mr Allen.

"Veronica, you need a full overhaul." Veronica was wearing a blue blazer, white shirt and blue skirt. If anything, she was probably the only one among the nine who actually wore the same outfit as the characters. Veronica swore it was pure coincidence that the change of clothes she had packed for her sleepover at Ram's place was similar to what the character wore.

"Why? Isn't this what I'm supposed to wear for the musical?" Veronica pointed out, glancing at Heather (Duke)'s clothes. She was wearing a green hoodie, a low cut black singlet and a green skirt. She also wore a pair of green track shoes, and Veronica assumed that the ankle socks she wore were either green or black. "Duke's not even close to the actual thing..."

"Unless you're telling me you're going to prance around in that during practice sessions, then no, you're gonna change. First we'll need something frumpy, then something the Heathers will all wear..." Mr Allen explained, going over to Heather (Chandler). "As for you... strip everything. In the bathroom please."

"Oh, so she gets the bathroom treatment?!" Heather (McNamara) angrily asked, removing her crop top which made Heather (Chandler) blush heavily. Mr Allen slapped his forehead, groaning at the sight of a scantily clad Heather.

"You know what? You guys are right. I shouldn't ask you all to strip first. I should get you guys to go grow some brain cells!"

XXXXXX

"So apparently because of Mr Allen's decision that we have to wear something specific for practice, we're going to the mall. How peachy." Veronica mumbled, trudging into the mall with the rest of the main cast. "What the fuck am I supposed to get?!"

"Y-You are supposed to get a blue scrunchie, a plain grey t-shirt, a blue hoodie, blue skirt and blue flats." Heather (Chandler) replied, holding up a list of clothes the cast were supposed to get apart from Kurt and Ram. They still tagged along, volunteering to carry for the girls (and JD). "Mr Allen is so nice to give us a list of clothes to buy..."

"Urgh, well bright side is that I can wear that at home or when I'm going out." Veronica sighed, looking into her wallet. "Shit, JD lend me all your money for today."

"Seriously?! I wanna buy a Big Gulp later." JD protested, with Veronica responding by showing him the middle finger. "Fine fine. Besides, those practice clothes look good on ya when on a date."

"Stop shipping me and Duke."

"Didn't say it was her." JD cackled, making Veronica fume with rage as she tried her very best to not connect her fist to his face.

"Grrrrr... Chandler, what did he ask you to get?" Veronica decided to change her conversational partner in an attempt to forget about JD.

"Red scrunchie, red hoodie, black crop top, black skirt... red high heels?"

"High heels?! You're tall enough without them!"

"She can be fashionable too y'know." Heather (McNamara) interjected, looking up at Heather (Chandler). "You're real tall now that I think about it..."

"Actually Mac, I'm more concerned about her CG." Veronica replied, taking a peek at the list. "Well at least it's not stated what the height of the heels should be..."

"What's CG?" Heather (McNamara) whispered to Heather (Duke), who pulled out a Physics textbook and shoved it to the former. "Ow!"

"Read up Mac. No wonder you're failing. Just because you're you, doesn't mean you should get guys to help you cheat." Heather (Duke) sighed, turning to Heather (Chandler). "Chandler, what do I need?"

"Well he said that you need a black crop top, knee-length green socks and optional but preferably green boots. Oh and a green hairclip."

"Wow it's gonna be drafty huh?" Heather (Duke) chuckled, staring at Heather (Chandler)'s chest worriedly. "I'm worried for you Chandler..."

"It's okay, I won't keel over that easily~" Heather (Chandler) cheerily replied, going over to Martha and Pauline. "Do you need me to tell you the clothes you have to buy?"

"Just read everyone's out. That way we know what each other need and can call them over if we find something suitable." Pauline suggested, looking down at her slip-ins. "Do I even need to dance around in the first place? I'm just twirling around like a right idiot during the musical..."

"Aw Pauline, that's not true. You play a big part in 'Shine A Light'!" Martha replied, which made Pauline scowl. "What's wrong?"

"That song basically glorifies suicide into some newsworthy topic! No way do I like playing a large role in that song!" Pauline shot back, going up to Heather (Chandler) and snatching the list away from her. "You're taking too long!"

 _[HM: Yellow scrunchie, yellow hoodie, white t-shirt, yellow skirt, knee high yellow socks, black sneakers with yellow highlights_

 _HD: Green hairclip, black crop top, knee high green socks, black skirt, green boots (optional)_

 _HC: Red scrunchie, red hoodie, black crop top, black mini skirt, red high heels_

 _VS: Blue scrunchie, plain grey t-shirt, blue hoodie, blue skirt, blue flats_

 _MD: Nerdy top, men's jeans, 80s glasses_

 _PF: Grey scarf, long, flowy cardigan (with floral patterns), skirt touching floor, pink shirt?_

 _JD: Belt with metal buckle, black skinny jeans, black boots]_

"Can I just say how disturbed I am with Chandler wearing a crop top?" Ram asked, glancing through the list. Everyone nodded, including Heather Chandler herself. "Good, cause she's... you know."

"Skin and bones, we get it." Pauline finished, handing the list back to Heather (Chandler). "Why are you wearing high heels for practice anyways?! You're like, super tall and don't tell me it's because you wanna be fashionable and all that crap. I've overheard you guys just now by the way."

"He said something about getting used to moving in heels." Heather (Chandler) mumbled, doing her very best to catch up to her friends, who were actually at least three metres in front of her. They soon arrived at a large clothing store, named 'EveryThong'. "U-Um, they... don't just specialise in... naughty panties right?"

"No, they specialise in everything. I get my clothes here." Heather (Duke) reassured the shy Heather, dragging her into the store. "C'mon!"

"H-Hey, wait!"

XXXXXX

"... We really need to get you something other than a crop top." Heather (McNamara) commented, averting her green eyes away from Heather (Chandler)'s extremely bony frame. All her bones were protruding out after all, no need for her to see it a second time. _'She'll look like she'll break if she had sex... shit, what if the guy she eventually allows him to take her virginity breaks her literally?! Oh fuck no, I'm not gonna let ANYONE date her until they're worthy!'_

"I-It fits my chest though." Heather (Chandler) replied, showing off her chest to Heather (McNamara). The black crop top had indeed fitted her... if only that was actually a crop top. "W-Why did you suggest getting a black sports bra instead though? Mr Allen told us to get a crop top for me..."

"For starters, you don't even wear a bra even though you're a B." Heather (McNamara) started, holding up the price tag for the bra. "Secondly, this is cheaper. Remember that all these clothes are coming out of our own pocket."

"Good point... Um, I don't suppose I could wear back my clothes?" Heather (Chandler) asked, referring to her original set of clothes. The set of clothes consisted of a long sleeved red t-shirt, khaki-coloured cargo pants and a pair of black slip-ins. "I-It's getting a little chilly."

"I still need to get you those heels. What's your size again?"

"U-Um, I'm not really sure. You can take my shoes out and ask though?"

"Will do. Just to check, do they fit you perfectly?" Heather (Chandler) nodded, prompting Heather (McNamara) to leave the dressing room with the slip-ins in tow. She did a half-turn so as to face herself in the mirror, which reflected an extremely malnourished girl clad in red. "... Maybe I should start getting help..."

"Mac? You in there?" The door that separated Heather (Chandler) from the rest of the store was pounded on, startling her slightly. "Mac?! Did you overdose on sleeping pills or something?"

"I'm outside bitch! Chandler's the one that's in there." Heather (McNamara) responded, knocking on the door herself. "I'm back, see whether these fit you."

"... Okay." Heather (Chandler) opened the door, only to see Heather (Duke) dressed in the clothes she was supposed to wear for musical practice. "W-Where's McNamara?"

"Behind me. You look... worrying, as usual." Heather (Duke) stepped aside to reveal Heather (McNamara), who was also dressed in the clothes she was supposed to wear for practice. Heather (Chandler) blinked, she was sure that Heather (McNamara) was still in her bra and and skirt when she left the room, but now...

"M-McNamara? W-When did you change?"

"Just now."

"O-Outside?!" Heather (McNamara) nodded, apparently not seeing the problem Heather (Chandler) had with it.

"Is... that a problem?"

"Y-Yes! You can get yourself arrested for indecency!"

"Been there, done that." Heather (McNamara) replied nonchalantly, handing Heather (Chandler) the pair of heels. "Here you go, try 'em on."

"... M-Maybe I should also start questioning my friends' life choices." Heather (Chandler) mumbled, not loud enough for Heather (McNamara) to hear but certainly loud enough for Heather (Duke) to hear.

"Hahahaha! So true."

"What the fuck are you laughing about...?"

XXXXXX

"That was exhausting..." Martha sighed as she nibbled on her egg sandwich. They were on their way back to school, ready to actually start practicing for their musical. They considered themselves lucky that they only took two hours to get what they wanted, despite two-thirds of the main cast being girls. Sexist, the guys knew that, but the girls had more clothes to buy... and with much more specifics.

"Yeah. I can't wait to fucking get home." Heather (McNamara) nodded, busy typing away on her smartphone. "Hey Duke, would you rather have Chandler kissing you or you kissing her?"

"Does it matter?" Heather (Duke) asked, glancing at the screen. "Oh god, is that smut?! Dude, what kind of relationship do you see between me and her?!"

"A mistress-servant relationship. You're obviously the bottom, but I'm not too sure whether I should give you a brief moment of power by kissing her, or let her completely dominate you for the whole 8000 word story."

"Uh... I don't know, giving her some power would be nice? In your terms, it can make the sex hotter."

"Great, thanks." Heather (McNamara) went back to her story, while Heather (Duke) gagged after seeing the plot.

"Chandler, if you ever wanna fuck Mac, tell her what are the things you're not okay with." Heather (Duke) warned her best friend, realising what she had just said. "Actually, forget what I've just said. You're too innocent to know what kinky shit she writes."

 _'Actually I'm a big fan of her stories, and it was because of her that I learnt how to relieve myself sexually...'_ Heather (Chandler) thought to herself, deciding that no one should ever know that bit of herself. "What does kinky sexual activities include?"

"Depends. Could be as simple as bondage... or as dangerous as erotic asphyxiation." JD replied, taking a peek at Heather (McNamara)'s phone screen. "Ooh, I like that bit when Chandler whips Duke silly. It's _so_ hot."

"Chandler, whipping people falls under BDSM. Some people find it hot, others don't. Apparently they get aroused by feeling pain, usually only from someone they love." Kurt added, looking up his own phone on the definition of BDSM. "Hey JD, is there any candle play in there?"

"Oh yeah, there is alright. Mac, keep this up and I'll be getting a boner."

"Then don't read it." Heather (McNamara) replied, not stopping her writing. "You guys do realise I'm a fan fiction writer because I'm using this platform to improve my writing skills?"

"Well, the fact that Dean's pants looks like a tent indicates that you are on your way to becoming a successful writer." Pauline commented, looking down at JD's erection. "Dean, could you cover it?"

"Wish I could Fleming, but usually my boners rage on for at least half an hour."

"Jerk it off then?"

"Hey hey hey! Don't you _dare_ get off in my car!" Ram yelled from the driver's seat, not even looking up at the mirror to check whether JD was really paying attention to him. "Martha, this sounds real bad but what's JD doing?"

"Trying to convince Pauline to give him a handjob?" Martha replied, with JD attempting to get Pauline to 'touch Roddy the dick'. "Does your erection have a name like JD's too?"

"Since when is their relationship at the physical level?!" Ram screeched, narrowly missing an oncoming car. "V! Do something!"

"I'm still in shock that JD actually forced Pauline to grab his junk." Veronica simply replied, noticing that Heather (Chandler) was staring intently at JD's erection. "Chandler, just because you have never seen a penis before doesn't mean that you should look at JD's."

"Oh no, I've seen one before. I'm more interested to see how does a man receive a handjob." Veronica quickly whipped her head around, only to see Pauline actually fondling 'Roddy'.

"OH MY FUCKING GOD! YOU TWO HAVE SOME SERIOUS EXPLAINING TO DO ONCE WE GET OUT OF RAM'S CAR!"

XXXXXX

"Uh well, we're not exactly dating." Pauline explained, her head hung low while JD was sheepishly grinning away. "We're more of... friends with benefits?"

"I think you mean fuck buddies." JD said, which angered Veronica eve more than Pauline's explanation. "Okay okay now hold on, I know what you're thinking. She's not 18 yet, so technically it's not a good idea."

"What the fuck were you two thinking?! Fuck buddies?! There has to be a better way than fucking each other silly!" Veronica scolded like how a mother would scold her child for doing something wrong. "And you Pauline, I'm extremely disappointed in you!"

"... We haven't actually went to the penetration stage yet?"

"Pauline, no. I don't give a shit what stage you two are at! Casual sex is dangerous, didn't you learn that in freshman year?!" Veronica continued her tirade, turning to JD. "Did you?"

"Um well, no. My sex ed teacher in my previous school actually advocated casual sex. But yes, I know casual sex can be dangerous if preventive measures aren't taken." JD hesitantly replied, averting his eyes away from Veronica. "And at least I know what condoms are for. My teacher thought they were a substitute for balloons."

"Oh my god! I'm really mad at you two right now! You two are throwing your lives away just for... for... 30 minutes of fun?!"

"Actually, Mac here threw hers away to go against her parents." Heather (Duke) pointed to Heather (McNamara), who was trying to escape the auditorium. "Hey! Come back!"

"No! I'm not getting myself lumped with them! Besides, you're no longer a virgin too!" Heather (McNamara) yelled back, draining the colour off Heather (Duke)'s cheeks. "Yeah, why don't you tell Veronica who you lost yours to?!"

"W-We were drunk! And _you're_ the one who forced yourself on me!"

"... It was great though, the sex."

"... Yeah..."

"Oh come on! You two too?! Martha, please tell me that you and Ram are still in a pure relationship." Veronica asked, her eyes widening after the couple didn't say anything for a while. "O-Oh god... don't tell me..."

"... It was protected sex." Ram mumbled, hiding behind Kurt. "A-And Kurt here had sex! With his cousin!"

"Dude, why did you have to go tell her that?!" Kurt gulped, taking a few steps back from Veronica. "W-What's the big deal with fucking my cousin if I love her?!"

"Everything! Do you think incest is funny?!" Veronica asked, causing Heather (Chandler) to scoot away from her. "Chandler? Why... why are you moving away from me... oh. No you didn't."

"M-My brother wanted to try it out... and I thought that as a sister I should help him out... I-I'm so sorry..." Heather (Chandler) whispered, tears brimming in her eyes. "P-Please don't hate me..."

"... I'm going out to release some steam." Veronica seethed, stomping out of the auditorium just as Mr Zaly and Mr Allen entered the auditorium.

"Wow you guys, you actually went through with it. Here, everyone gets 50 each. Just like I promised." Mr Allen said, waving 50 dollar bills in his hand. JD took the money out of his hand and started to distribute them equally, each receiving a crisp green note. "I'm proud of ya, especially you Heather Chandler."

"... I feel guilty though. Veronica actually thought we were having..." Heather (Chandler) mumbled, sadly gazing at her share of the money. "It's mean of us to do this to her."

"Allen over here hoped that Veronica can get mad enough so that she'll be in her character for practice." Mr Zaly explained, sighing afterwards. "Obviously, it was a flop."

"Hey, I thought she'll take it as a joke!" Mr Allen tried to defend himself, but the guilty looks on the main cast's faces voided any further explanations to defend himself. "Alright, I'll talk to her about it tomorrow. You guys are dismissed, no point practicing when the main star isn't here and when you guys are mopey and all."

"Thanks." The eight of them mumbled back, with everyone but the two jocks feeling the most remorseful. Martha didn't say anything throughout, but her silence was more powerful than she had thought. JD and Pauline were beating themselves over what they had done to signal the start of the 'joke' Mr Allen had challenged them to do. Heather (McNamara) felt slightly responsible for dragging the other Heathers into the mess, especially Heather (Chandler). Kurt and Ram felt guilty too, in fact all of them did, but they knew that they couldn't do much to salvage the situation. Not as much as the rest at least.

"... What should we do now?" Martha was the first one to speak up, tears starting to well up in her eyes. "W-We played a prank on her... a-and she most likely hates all of us now!"

"Martha, calm down. We'll go over to her house, and explain it to her. It was a joke that all eight of us went too far, and if we apologise, the probability of her accepting it would be 30 percent." Pauline consoled Martha, providing the rest with a statistic that made everyone feel even more guilty. "... Okay fine, 35 percent."

"I'm more worried that her dad's a cop while her mom's a lawyer. They could give us hell big time." JD groaned, kicking a pebble in his path. Heather (Chandler) started to smile, pulling on JD's sleeve eagerly. "Ya need something?"

"U-Um, Mrs Sawyer... what does she specialise in?" Heather (Chandler) asked, a pleading look in her eyes as JD debated whether he should tell her directly.

"Divorce, if I'm not wrong. Why?"

"O-Oh, it's nothing." JD eyed Heather (Chandler) but decided that he won't say anything. Besides, their main priority now was to tell Veronica that they weren't sexually active. JD shrugged, trying to formulate a speech that would send a clear message to Veronica that they had not fucked before-

"... Hey Duke, how do we confess to Veronica that we had drunk sex in a tactful way that won't make her freak out like just now?" Heather (McNamara) asked, shooting Heather (Duke) a worried look. Heather (Duke) gave her a worried expression of her own, unable to come up with a feasible solution.

"... Say that we were 11 then?"

"Oh Jesus fucking Christ, just don't tell her anything." JD groaned, wondering how the fuck did his gay best friend and new shy friend fall for such idiots. _'Scratch that damn speech, I should just exclude Duke and Mac.'_

XXXXXX

"To conclude, that was simply experimenting under the influence of alcohol. The end." Heather (Duke) concluded her explanation on why she had slept with Heather (McNamara) at the young age of 11. Veronica didn't look impressed, but her anger towards the main cast had softened somewhat. Good thing too, Pauline shuddered at the memory of actually holding JD's penis just for 50 dollars. Wasn't worth it in her opinion, and wouldn't even do it again.

"... Who gave you two alcohol in the first place? Anyways, while I'm still pissed at you guys, at least it's a relief to know that most of them weren't true." Veronica sighed heavily, shaking her head at the memory of blowing her top at them a few hours ago. "I'm sorry too, it's not really any of my business whether you guys fucked or not. Just that, y'know, I exist because of casual sex, and my parents kinda regret having me super early..."

"Veronica, you're not a mistake. Besides, your parents really love you. All of us can tell when we met them just now." Heather (Duke) said, placing a hand on Veronica's shoulder. Veronica cracked a smile, which relieved the rest as they knew that they were forgiven. Heather (Duke) continued to place her hand on Veronica's shoulder, her next words coming out as a whisper. "... I wish my parents didn't see _me_ as a mistake..."

"What was that?" Veronica asked, able to hear Heather (Duke) whispering something but unable to hear exactly what. Heather (Duke) shook her head, a forced smile on her face as she removed her hand from Veronica's shoulder.

"Nothing. Anyways, Chandler and Mac are downstairs with your parents. Shall we join them?"

"Oh! Let's have a movie night here! If Veronica doesn't mind that is." Martha suggested, her face lighting up upon noticing the time on the clock. Veronica nodded, happily goring over to her study table and pulling out a stack of videos. "Yay! Movie night on a weekday!"

"I'll go over next door to get some supplies. Dean, you're helping. You too Kelly." Pauline ordered, dragging the mentioned guys out of the room. Veronica and Heather (Duke) decided to go down to check up on the other two Heathers, though the third Heather seemed to already be aware what was going on downstairs.

"Hey mom, can I host a movie night?" Veronica asked her mother, a rather short woman with a expression permanently locked in a scowl. Her mother nodded, going back to conversing Heather (Chandler). It was then Veronica caught snippets of their conversation, and it disturbed her greatly.

"S-So, you are willing to help us with the divorce?" Heather (Chandler) asked Veronica's mother, with the latter nodding. "T-That's great! U-Um, what are the chances of succeeding?"

"Hearing your case, around 90. You should have gotten help a long time ago." Veronica's mother replied, sighing heavily. Veronica gulped, she didn't know that Heather (Chandler) was already married.

"I know... but it's just that he was drunk, a-and he doesn't know what he's doing!"

"Heather, you and your mom are victims. No matter what state he's in, it's no excuse to treat you in such a way." Veronica then realised that Heather (Chandler) wasn't married, but rather she was trying help her mother file for a divorce. She turned to Heather (Duke), who had a worried smile on her face.

"You knew about her father."

"Yes we did. And yes, we tried to help Mrs Chandler file for a divorce. But no, he caught on and threatened us."

"Then the incident of burning his moustache..."

"Oh that was true. Mrs Chandler was just trying to ease the tension after burning his face by commenting that he became more handsome."

"... What did he threaten you two with?" At this point, Heather (Duke) flinched. Veronica decided that it was time to drop the topic and talk about another one. "So uh, is Chandler underweight because her father wants her to be skinny?"

"It's more of him locking the females up in some secluded corner of the house without any access to food than him wanting to have skinny females in his family. Don't even ask about her brother, he's a complete jackass."

"Why wasn't he reported from the start then?! Hey Chandler!" Veronica yelled, going up to said girl and slapping her hard on the cheek. "That's for keeping it to yourself instead of telling us!"

"Veronica, apologise for slapping her." Veronica's mother said, rolling her eyes at her daughter's temperamental nature, "After that, stomp on her foot hard from now on."

"A-Apology accepted! Please don't step on my feet!" Heather (Chandler) hastily replied, hiding behind Heather (Duke). "D-Duke, can we stay at your place for the time being?"

"I suppose. Don't you want to stay with your future wife instead?" Heather (Duke) asked, a teasing smile on her lips. Heather (Chandler) understood what her best friend was implying, and blushed furiously. "Hahaha! Red's a nice colour on you."

"D-Don't tease me please!" The rest of the main cast along with Heather (McNamara) and Veronica's father came to the room they were in, attracted by the noise made. "W-Why are there so many people now?"

"Aw man, show's over." JD groaned in disappointment, receiving a hard nudge from Pauline. "Fine... what's for dinner?"

"Dinner? Whatever Pauline hauled over to her house." Veronica stated, noticing that the only food Pauline brought was three packs of gummy bears. "I mean... KFC is still available?"

"KFC? Wow, that's a luxury! Can I really eat that?" Heather (Chandler) asked, beaming innocently. The rest deadpanned, save for the Heathers. "D-Did I say something I shouldn't have?"

XXXXXX

Okay, I'm gonna end it here! Hm, seems like Heather Chandler's issue is brought to light and is now currently getting itself solved. I bet it'll help her gain enough weight to look even more like Heather Chandler from the musical! I'm also real happy for Veronica, yet why do I feel that there is more drama lurking underneath? I mean, I _am_ the writer, but I haven't really fleshed out the issues of the affected characters. On the bright side, Chapter 4 is where the practice sessions actually start! Yay me~! Seriously though, I've been beating round bushes for the past three chapters... With that, this is Slushie Addict signing out and looking forward to hear your thoughts!


	4. Chapter 4

Hey hey Slushie Addict here! So uh, actually I really have nothing to say apart from addressing reviews and thanking you readers for reading my story. And I'm getting the hang of doing the A/N! Whoo! Okay okay so from this chapter onwards, I'm gonna go full swing into practice sessions. There'll be some chapters which focus on issues the characters have (by now I think you know who is/are involved) but overall it should be practice more than issues. Okay now that I'm done rambling for the first A/N, cue the yelling through a microphone and I don't own Heathers!

XXXXXX

"Now that the apology is outta the way, let's start practicing!" Mr Allen said, clapping his hands to signal the start of practice. The auditorium was now filled with students, a stark contrast to yesterday's turnout. "Okay, we'll start with 'Beautiful'! Places everyone!"

"Mr Allen! Can I leave the gauze on?" Heather (Duke) asked, referring to the gauze protecting her broken nose. Mr Allen slapped his forehead, apparently forgetting something related to her.

"Shit! I forgot that your nose was busted. Hey Chandler, c'mere for a sec!" He yelled at Heather (Chandler), who was already backstage. Everyone within a two metre radius winced, his loud voice was amplified by the microphone he was holding. Heather (Chandler) complied, running up to Mr Allen.

"Yes?"

"During 'Candy Store', slap her instead of push her. I don't wanna pay for her medical bills." Mr Allen instructed, with the girl nodding.

"Which side of her cheek should I slap?"

"Doesn't matter. Places!" Mr Allen yelled again, making Veronica wish that there was a mute button on him. She groaned, complying with Mr Allen and got back to the centre of the stage, with a notebook in hand. "Okay Veronica, get ready in three! Two! One!"

 _"September 1st, 1989. Dear diary, I believe I'm a good person. You know, I think there's good in everyone... yeah right. There's no fucking way there's good in everyone." _Veronica had barely finished her first line when she was interrupted by Mr Allen.

"CUT!" Mr Allen yelled, slapping his forehead. Ms Religion, a woman around her late 20s, gave Veronica a thumbs-up. The background performers blinked, not sure what was the problem with Veronica's lines. "Veronica, do you know I asked you to stop?"

"Uh... no. Not at all." Veronica honestly replied, she had said the truth after all. "It's true, not everyone is good... oh. That's... that's not part of the script right?"

"Damn right it isn't. Didn't you watch the musical? Don't you know the lines by now?!" Mr Allen groaned, making a mental note to photocopy the scripts for the main cast.

"Whoops."

"I'll whoop your ass if you make a mistake in your first line again! Start over!" He barked, handing the microphone to Ms Religion. "And action!"

 _"September 1st, 1989. Dear diary, I believe I'm a good person. You know, I think there's good in everyone but uh, here we are! First day of senior year and uh, I look around at these kids all of life, and I ask myself what happened?" _

_Freak! Slut! Burnout! Bug-eyes! Poser! Lard-ass!_

 _"We were so tiny, happy and shiny, playing tag and getting chased!"_ Veronica sang, her thoughts wandering back to freshman year, when she observed most students in the senior year being so... poisonous. She shuddered at that comparison, thankful that her last year in high school was 'happy and shiny' as she had beautifully sang.

 _Freak! Slut! Loser! Short-bus!_

 _"Singing and clapping, laughing and napping, baking cookies and eating paste."_ Veronica chuckled at that line, remembering a memory of her childhood where she was stuffing her mouth silly with cookies and getting herself a nasty stomachache afterwards. _'Pffft, good times indeed.'_

 _Bull-dyke! Stuck-up! Hunchback!_

 _"Then we got bigger, that was the trigger, like the Huns invading Rome."_ At this moment, an actor purposely bumped Veronica, shooting her a glare. _"Oh, sorry. Welcome to my school, this ain't no high school! This is the Thunderdome. Hold your breath and count the days, we're graduating soon."_

 _White trash!_

 _"College would be paradise, if I'm not dead by noon!"_ The microphone in Me Religion's hand was snatched away by Mr Allen, which foreshadowed another yelling from him.

"CUT! Veronica! What the flying fuck?! We all want to die soon but you cannot say that when you're up on stage!"

"T-That was an honest slip-up. Sorry." Veronica apologised, earning herself laughter from the people on stage and even from Ms Religion. "But hey, that's pretty funny right?"

"I don't fucking care, but if you 'slip-up' again, I ensure that you won't even get to live to tomorrow noon!" Mr Allen fumed, thrusting the microphone back to his coworker. "Continue from where you left off!"

XXXXXX

 _"Oooooops~"_ Ram had a shit-eating grin plastered on his face, slamming Veronica's lunch tray down to the floor. Veronica rolled her eyes, as part of the act of course.

 _"Ram Sweeney. Third year as linebacker and eigth year of smacking and being a huge dick."_

 _"What did you say to me dyke?!"_ Ram had gripped on to Veronica's collar and lifted her up, staring down at the shorter girl. This scene would have been perfect, if only he did not flub his line. "... Oh shit."

"CUT! Ram, what the fuck?!" Mr Allen grabbed the microphone and hurled it to the floor, an ear-piercing screech coming from the device two seconds later. "Did you guys actually watch the musical, or did you just left it on while you guys were having an orgy session?!"

"C'mon Allen-man, it's kinda hard to remember it on the spot." Ram defended, apologising to Veronica afterwards. "Sorry V, shouldn't have called you that huh?"

"Bright side, at least you got the personality down!" Ms Religion complimented, trying her best to soften the tense atmosphere among the performers. "Why don't we take a 30 minute break? We have been going at it for two hours."

"Fine. You guys better not fuck up your lines when the break's over." Mr Allen agreed, storming out of the auditorium. The main cast groaned in frustration, not at Mr Allen but at themselves for being unable to remember the first few lines. Veronica had observed that the background performers were much better than them, even though they didn't have much lines.

"Hey you guys, nice improv." A boy with dark skin approached Veronica and Ram, a bright smile on his face. "Where are my manners? I'm Alfred Black, who is also ironically black! I'm on the stage lights crew!"

"Soooo... it's not a slur if they call themselves black?" Ram whispered, not wanting Alfred to hear his question. Veronica shrugged, she didn't really think it was a racist slur since people also address them as 'white'.

"Speaking of irony, you should meet my buddy! His name is Roger Nigger, and also black, buuuut... he kinda has a chip on his shoulder about his family name so don't call him that." Alfred continued, directing their attention to a tall man with charcoal-coloured skin. "We call him Charcoal, cuz he's as black as one!"

"Hey man, not cool!" Roger yelled from his spot, giving Alfred the finger. "And FYI, my family name is 'Nigger' because some white asshat gave one of my ancestors a derogatory family name!"

"Chill dude. They weren't even mentioning it."

"I'm more concerned that Ms Religion's English class is mainly..." Ram wanted to say 'black', but he wasn't sure if he should say that in front of two African-Americans.

"Black? Yeah something about credit and the whole class being super eager to even be up on stage." Alfred replied, noticing a woman in her mid-30s entering the auditorium. "Oh hey Mrs Horndog!"

"Please don't call me that. Call me Mrs Suzie." The woman sighed, resenting the family name she took upon marriage. "I'm so glad I'm named normally, imagine if I'm called 'Orgasm' or 'Boobies'!"

"Who the hell will name their children that?!" Veronica asked, amused at the terms listed by the English teacher. Mrs Suzie scoffed, dispelling Veronica's question instantly. "... I take it that you know someone with that name?"

"My brother is called Dick Orgasm Cunt, and my sister is called Booby Cunt. And before you say anymore, it's not a tradition to name children after some adult rated stuff." Mrs Suzie shook her head, going up to Ms Religion. "Eve, where's Allen?"

"Who knows? He flipped out after Veronica and Ram improvised in the first song." Ms Religion replied, averting her eyes away from her coworker. Veronica noticed this, and had also observed a blush on the younger teacher's cheeks.

 _'Oh, so there's even unrequited crushes within the faculty huh? High school is really full of_ drama...' Veronica thought to herself, deciding that she should head to the back of the stage where the rest of the main cast were. "How are the clothes Chandler?"

"I-I think it should be alright if I gained more weight..." Heather (Chandler) replied, a bashful smile on her face. "I just wish that for practice I could wear something... less revealing."

"Don't worry, just eat more junk food and you'll be able to fit into your clothes." Heather (Duke) said, going up to Veronica and Heather (Chandler). "Dead by noon huh?"

"Self-diagnosed teenage depression." Veronica responded, cracking a smile on Heather (Duke)'s face before it disappeared. "You okay?"

"Hm? Nah, just thinking that it's kinda sad that more and more people are diagnosed with depression at such a young age. I would tell them to just smile, but I know that's just me glossing over their issues." Heather (Duke) sighed, but the way she had expressed her thoughts made Veronica feel that she wasn't told the whole story. She won't push it though, she figured that it was best to let sleeping dogs lie.

"Duke! Can I copy off your Physics homework? Mine's due tomorrow!" Heather (McNamara) asked, already holding Heather (Duke)'s homework in her right hand.

"You're already holding on to it! Just don't crumple it like the last time or I won't let you copy off my work again." Heather (Duke) sighed, shaking her head. "Anyways Veronica, did you know that those two are in an affiar?"

"Which two?" Veronica asked, though she had an idea who were the subjects in question. After all, there was only one known person in the auditorium that was married. Heather (Duke) chuckled, playing along with Veronica.

"Oh you know, their relationship is like a clash between religious beliefs and hypersexuality."

"We can hear you from here you know!" Ms Religion shouted, an embarrassed blush on her face while Mrs Suzie laughed playfully. "And don't say that we're in an affair, you make it sound so ugly!"

"You're right. Mrs Suzie's the only one in the affair. Cause y'know, she's in a relationship?" Heather (Duke) replied, not going up on stage as she didn't want to meet face to face with the two teachers. "But hey, at least you two like each other!"

"I thought it was a one-sided crush."

"Nice one Veronica, I'll pen that down for my story tonight! Should I use Chandler and me, or should I go with Duke and me this time?"

"Just make 'em complicated or something." Veronica replied, going back to the front as Mr Allen had just stormed back in with a cup of coffee in his hand. "See you later."

"O-Okay!" Heather (Chandler) was the one who sent Veronica off, while the other two Heathers were doing their own stuff. "M-McNamara?"

"Yeah Chandler?"

"I think you should make a love square for your story!" Heather (McNamara) wanted to crumple Heather (Duke)'s homework, but restrained herself as Heather (Duke) was serious about her promises.

"I-I... sure, t-that's a great idea."

XXXXXX

 _"And there's the Heathers, they float above it all."_ Veronica stated, with the background characters forming a crowd around the Heathers. She noticed that although they had little to no lines, whenever they spoke up it sounded natural. It made Veronica (and the rest of the main cast) wonder if they should be part of the main cast instead.

 _"I love Heather, Heather, and Heather..."_ The crowd muttere, parting to show the Heathers to the audience.

 _"Heather McNamara, head cheerleader. Her dad is loaded, he sells engagement rings."_ Veronica described, with Heather (McNamara) stepping out. She was supposed to place an imaginary ring on her left hand, depicting the rings. She was NOT supposed to get down on one knee and propose to Heather (Chandler) by opening an imaginary box, which was what she did. Needless to say, Mr Allen flipped out at the mistake.

"McNamara! What the fuck are you doing?!"

"Proposing to Chandler before she drinks Drano." Heather (McNamara) smirked, amused at his reaction. Veronica wondered if she was making mistakes on purpose just to get a rise out of Mr Allen, which would he hilarious if only Veronica wasn't tired after four hours of practice. At that rate, they probably had to stay overnight if Mr Allen wasn't willing to let them go home until they were perfect.

"You...! Gah! Veronica! Start from where you stopped!" Mr Allen groaned, deciding that getting an answer out of Heather 'Rebel' McNamara was bad for his sanity.

 _"I hate Heather, Heather, and Heather..."_

 _"Heather Duke, runs the yearbook. No discernible personality but her mom paid for implants."_ Veronica continued, with said Heather stepping out to show off her padded chest. It would be a good run, if only Heather (Duke) was actually lifting her chest to show it off to the audience.

"DUKE! What the fuck are you doing?!" Heather (Duke) stopped, her hands still on her chest. "I said to lift your fucking pads!"

"T-That's what I'm doing though?" Heather (Duke) asked, genuinely confused at her mistake. Mr Allen slapped a palm to his forehead, motioning for a giggling Heather (McNamara) to explain her mistake.

"Your hand positioning is wrong."

"Is it? I thought I'm supposed to lift?" Heather (Duke) still didn't understand, and proceeded to 'lift' her pads with her hands still on them. She squeezed it slightly, which made Heather (McNamara) laughed even harder. "W-What's so funny?!"

"You're groping your pads asshole! Lifting means that your hands are under your pads!" Heather (McNamara) explained, squeezing Heather (Duke)'s pads. "Ooh they're fucking soft..."

"Touch your own perv."

"I would... but it hurts. My period is probably around the corner..."

"Stop talking about periods, and get on it, period!" Mr Allen roared, steam visibly coming out from his ears. Veronica never knew that it was possible to have steam coming out from ears, but she decided not to ask. "Continue!"

 _"I need Heather, Heather, and Heather..."_

 _"And Heather Chandler, the almighty..."_ Veronica paused, waiting for Heather (Chandler) to step out and blow a kiss at the the audience. Surprisingly, not only did she manage to execute the kiss successfully but she had also managed to look condescending, something that satisfied Mr Allen. _'She is a mythic bitch."_

 _"They're solid Teflon, never bothered. Never harassed."_ Veronica told Martha, presumably having lunch with her as they were still holding on to their lunch trays. _"I would give anything to be like them."_

 _"I like to be their boyfriend."_ An actor declared, with the Heathers rolling their eyes (as according to script) at that declaration.

 _"That would be beautiful..."_

 _"If I sat at their table, guys would notice me!"_ An actress sighed dreamily, with the Heathers shrugging. Veronica wondered if the Heathers from the musical actually existed, would they want undivided attention from guys? She assumed that Heather (Chandler) and Heather (Duke) might want them, but wasn't too sure if Heather (McNamara) was okay with being seen as eye-candy.

 _"So beautiful..."_

 _"I-I like them to be nicer..."_ Martha muttered, with Veronica nodding in approval. Heather (McNamara) and Heather (Chandler) had also nodded, but the former was just following the script (as she's the nicest in the musical) while the latter was actually agreeing with Martha in real life. Heather (Duke) scoffed, still in her character though Veronica noticed a twinkle in her eye, implying that she would also like the Heathers to be nicer.

 _"That would be beautiful...!"_

 _"I like to tie up a Heather and photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse and leave her tied up for the rats..."_ Roger grinned, which was a cue for everyone up on stage to look horrified. Well, Martha and Heather (Chandler) didn't look like they were faking, considering their personalities. Mr Allen nodded in approval, while Ms Religion heaved a sigh of relief as she wasn't subjected to noise pollution from Mr Allen. The performers moved on to the next scene, featuring the Heathers and Veronica in a washroom.

 _"Bleeeagh."_ Heather (Duke) made a convincing retching noise as she pretended to vomit on to the floor, which represented a toilet bowl. Veronica was impressed by her acting, yet mildly concerned that such quality could very well be Heather (Duke) actually vomiting enough to know how would it sound like. She dismissed the thought as quickly as it came, attributing her paranoia to the events that had plagued Heather (Chandler) until recently.

 _"Grow up Heather, bulimia is so '87." _Heather (Chandler) groaned, rolling her eyes to exaggerate her character's scorn. The tone she used was actually bordering on genuine concern, but Mr Allen had decided to not point it out for the time being as he observed that apart from that, the scene was going rather smoothly.

 _"Maybe you should see a doctor Heather."_ Heather (McNamara) suggested, with Heather (Duke) raising her head to look at her.

 _"Yeah Heather, maybe I should."_ At this moment, Pauline had entered the stage, a stern look on her face to imitate the teacher in the musical.

 _"Ah, Heather and Heather..."_

 _"Bleaaaagh."_ Heather (Duke) retched again, executing one of the musical's most amusing scenes perfectly.

 _"... and Heather."_ Pauline let out a soft sigh, folding her arms while Veronica hid behind her, as though there was a wall separating her from the other four actresses. _"Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over the vomiting? You're late for class."_

 _"Heather wasn't feeling well, we're helping her."_

 _"Not without a hall pass you're not. Week's detention!"_ Pauline had a smile on her face as she announced the Heathers' detention, which showed that she was actually looking forward to sending people to detention. Veronica wasn't sure if that was good characterisation on Pauline's part, but she had her own lines to worry about.

 _"A-Actually, all four of us are out on a hall pass."_ Veronica 'entered' the washroom, a hesitant smile on her face as Pauline held a slip of paper with suspicion angled towards Veronica. _"Yearbook duty."_

 _"... I see that you're all listed... Hurry up and get where you're going."_ Pauline admitted, shoving the paper at Veronica before making her exit off the stage. Heather (Chandler) sauntered up to Veronica and took the piece of paper off Veronica's hands, examining it with false scrutiny (as it was actually a receipt from yesterday when they bought their clothes for practice).

 _"This is an excellent forgery. Who are you?"_ Heather (Chandler) asked, looking impressed while the other two Heathers peered at the paper from the sides.

 _"Um Veronica. Sawyer. I crave a boon."_ Veronica extended her hand out, but Heather (Chandler) simply looked at it as thought it was the dirtiest thing she had ever set her baby-blue eyes on. Veronica immediately retracted her hand after a while, as she knew that none of the Heathers would shake her hand in that scenario.

 _"What boon."_

 _"Let me sit at your table! Just once, no talking necessary! If people think you guys tolerate me then they'll leave me alone."_ Veronica started, with amused cackling serving as the Heathers' response. _"Before you answer I also do report cards, permission slips, and absence notes."_

 _"How about prescriptions?"_ Heather (Duke) asked, with Heather (Chandler) glaring at her as though she was the dumbest person who have ever lived. _'Chandler's really good at acting, I think she should be fine with the swearing later on...'_

 _"Shut up Heather."_

 _"Sorry Heather."_ Heather (Duke) rolled her eyes, not the least bit scared that she had irritated her best friend. _'I think my character is either a real idiot to think that she can get medicine with a forged prescription, or USA in 1989 is just fucking blind. I'm gonna go with both.'_

 _"... For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure."_ Heather (Chandler) mumbled, grabbing hold of Veronica's face and examining her face. Heather (McNamara) nodded, going up to Veronica in (false) admiration.

 _"And a symmetrical face. If I took a meat cleaver down the centre of your skull, I'll have matching halves. That's very important."_ She had a mildly crazed look on her face as she motioned her left hand down from the top of Veronica's face. This scared Veronica, for she wasn't particularly keen to know how symmetrical her face was both in the musical and in real life.

 _"Of course, you can stand to gain a few pounds."_ Heather (Duke) shrugged, scoffing at Veronica's weight. The other three sighed, predicting what would happen afterwards.

"CUT! DUUUUUUUKE!" Mr Allen roared angrily, the look on his face threatening to murder someone.

"... I regret nothing." Heather (Duke) mumbled under her breath as she prepared herself for a tongue-lashing from Mr Allen.

XXXXXX

 _[Dear diary,_

 _Today's practice session was a little rough, but we eventually managed to make it through Beautiful! Duke and Chandler made quite a few mistakes, most of which belonged to Duke. Martha, Kurt and Pauline didn't make any, while Ram, Mac and I mostly made at most five. But our acting was so on point today, like Chandler **actually** acted bitchy towards me and Duke?! I think Candy Store will be okay! One thing about Duke that's suspicious was that she was **extremely** reluctant to roll up her hoodie sleeves. The other 2 Heathers don't seem to know why, but Duke assured me that it was just personal preference when I asked her about it. Anyways, Mr Allen was kind enough to let Duke off for practice, but firmly mentioned that during the actual thing next year, she had to roll up her blazer. The teachers said something about renting a large slushie machine for rehearsals, and a small soda one for JD after practice. He was so happy that he gets to have his soda while Pauline was thrilled to have slushies backstage. And the background characters are so good at acting, I should go ask Roger for tips tomorrow, his creepy kid act was so on point!_

 _-Veronica]_

XXXXXX

"Thanks for letting us stay here." Heather (Chandler) muttered, hiding behind a woman who was just as tall as her, except she was covered in multiple bruises. Heather (Duke) smiled, beckoning the two women to enter. "A-Are you sure we could-"

"Of course! This is kinda your house now. Her parents never come home, so it's all good." Heather (McNamara) said, holding up a bowl of popcorn. "Popcorn?"

"... Mac, this isn't your house. Why are you here?" Heather (Duke) deadpanned, grabbing a few pieces of popcorn and tossing them into her mouth. "Ew, did you buy the salted popcorn _again_?! You know I like it sweet!"

"Just like me." Heather (McNamara) grinned, earning herself a well-deserved smack from Heather (Duke). "Ow?! What the fuck?!"

"Don't try to flirt with me when your girlfriend is here." This had grabbed both of the Chandlers attention, and Heather (Duke) wondered if she should correct her statement in order to clear up the misunderstanding.

"... Your friend is gay?" Mrs Chandler asked her daughter, surprising the non-Chandlers that she had asked that question instead of the questionable relationship.

"Y-Yes? I guess? Does sleeping with a girl count?" Heather (Chandler) asked her best friends, both of them looking at each other as though they regretted it. "Veronica and Jason told me that you two were the only ones who told the truth when we told her about the adult things..."

"... Uhhh... You should ask Veronica. She's the one who came out last year." Heather (McNamara) suggested, awkwardly smiling at Mrs Chandler. Heather (Chandler) nodded, happily pulling out phone to call Veronica. She picked it up after three seconds, indicating that she was rather free at the moment.

"Veronica? It's me, Heather!"

 _"Which one?"_

"Oh, um, Chandler. Heather Chandler."

 _"Ah Chandler, what's up? It's pretty late of you to call, not that I mind of course."_

"I-I wanted to know how do you know that you like girls?" Coughing sounds were heard over the speaker, worrying Heather (Chandler). Heather (McNamara) pulled Heather (Duke) to one corner away from the Chandlers, asking a few questions of her own.

"So uh Duke, is it true that you have the hots for Veronica?" Heather (Duke) blushed a bright red, her grey eyes averting away from Heather (McNamara)'s emerald green. "I'll take it as a yes."

"... She doesn't like me." Heather (Duke)'s response came out as a whisper, which made the other Heather deliver a light chop to her head. "Ow."

"It's so fucking obvious that she likes you. Why the fuck do you think that she was so focused on you during practice?" Heather (McNamara) rolled her eyes, aware of Veronica's constant attention on the girl clad in mostly green. Heather (Duke) sighed, turning back to the Chandlers.

"Even if she did like what you claim, she wouldn't love the real me."

"Wait what?" Heather (McNamara) raised both her eyebrows, alarmed at the reply she received. _'Nooooo. Duke's not what I think she is right?'_

"A-Ah mom! Veronica said that you're gay if you only want to date and sleep with girls!" Heather (Chandler) had just ended her call with Veronica, a proud smile on her face.

"I see... Girls. Wouldn't that make older lesbians a paedophile?" Mrs Chandler asked, taking her daughter's words too literally.

 _'So that's where Chandler inherited her literal interpretation from...'_ Both Heathers thought to themselves, deciding to hear how would the third Heather explain to her mother that she had gotten the explanation wrong.

XXXXXX

 _[Dear diary (again for today),_

 _Chandler just called me to ask how do I know I was gay. Surprised me, though I get the feeling she was asking only to explain it to someone else? Speaking of gay, I think Mac's also gay. Like, for real gay. I seriously don't think that she'll fucking propose to Chandler during practice even if they were just friends. If it's to Duke, then yeah it's a joke. Chandler, no fucking way. I wonder what's Duke doing right now... lately I've been thinking about her more often. For some reason, it's always about her crying while I have a cup of pudding in my hands. Maybe I should tell her about it, she'll probably laugh at how stupid my dream is. JD just texted me, saying that he's at 7-11 buying a Big Gulp. Apparently Pauline's with him, getting a Slurpee. I swear, the fact that she touched Roddy leaves me with the impression that they're more than **just** friends! I really need to get involved in my friends' lives. _

_-Veronica]_

"Well that's about it today... I should get to bed soon." Veronica stretched her arms, preparing to head to bed just as her phone buzzed. "Huh, a message. Who is it from..."

 _Duke: [hey veronica, am i disturbing u?]_

 _Veronica: [Not really, what's up?]_

 _Duke: [nah nothing important]_

 _Duke: [just wanna apologise on chandlers behalf for making u awkward]_

 _Duke: [her mom asked if mcbk was gay, then chandler wasn't sure if fucking w/o romance was considered gay, so she asked u]_

 _Duke: [sorry for making it awkward]_

 _Veronica: [No problem, I was just surprised to hear from Chandler at this time.]_

 _Duke: [well she's staying at my place, not gonna set a curfew on her]_

 _Duke: [we're making sure she's eating junk food regularly]_

 _Duke: [until she hits the ok range though]_

 _Veronica: [Don't overdo it. Eating healthy is good too.]_

 _Duke: [yea, we're just increasing her fat count first]_

 _Veronica: [I see, is Mac also there with you two?]_

 _Duke: [let herself in uninvited as usual]_

 _Duke: [i dun mind rlly, keeps me company]_

 _Veronica: [Your parents aren't at home?]_

Veronica waited for five minutes, knowing that Heather (Duke) was still online. She wondered if she had asked a sensitive question, which was reinforced by the memory of Heather (Duke) being uncomfortable when talking about her parents' eye colours. Eventually she got a response, which she figured that Heather (Duke) took so long to reply was because she was trying to craft the perfect response to Veronica.

 _Duke: [work, usual stuff]_

 _Duke: [i like living the free life, so no biggie]_

 _Duke: [oh yea, back to the gay topic...]_

 _Duke: [which girl caught ur eye?]_

 _Duke: [like, even if ur not into JD or guys, it dun mean ur into girls too]_

 _Veronica: [Good question... I guess I just looked at a girl and started to fantasise having sex with her?]_

"Yeah right, like I'll tell her who was that girl." Veronica wryly smiled to herself, she wasn't going to admit that Heather (Duke) was the subject she's referring. _'That would be creepy.'_

 _Duke: [niiiice, thts so cool, knowing tht ur gay at 16]_

 _Duke: [im surrounded by 2 useless lesbos tht r gay for each other but too stupid to notice]_

 _Veronica: [You're not gay?]_

 _Duke: [uh]_

 _Duke: [i dunno]_

 _Duke: [does staring at boobs often count?]_

 _Veronica: [If you have sexual thoughts with it, then I suppose so?]_

 _Duke: [what abt staring at a specific set of boobs n remembering the time when we fucked?]_

 _Veronica: [... You're referring to Mac aren't you?]_

 _Duke: [teehee]_

 _Duke: [i dun like her romantically though, n fucking her was a one time thing]_

 _Veronica: [Do you have a type then?]_

 _Duke: [hmmm i like ppl like u]_

 _Duke: [gives me security]_

 _Duke: [wht abt u?]_

 _Veronica: [I don't know actually.]_

She was honest, she had really never thought of dating anyone. Veronica still didn't know why she had chosen to go out with JD in the first place, maybe because he was drop dead handsome, maybe because he was reliable. _'Dating is still a mystery to me...'_

 _Duke: [ooh tht makes sense]_

 _Duke: [anyways, mcbk's trying to hijack my phone so see ya tmr~]_

 _Veronica: [Same here.]_

"Huh, so Duke's the type to want stability. Kinda expected someone like her to go with the usual 'honest, responsible, funny' bullshit. Learn something new every day huh?" Veronica shrugged, picking up a photocopy of the musical script that Mr Allen had given to them before they left. Veronica wanted to sleep, but something about Heather (Duke) didn't settle well with her. As such, she decided that she should just start memorising her script to take her mind off the girl who had an eerily happy personality. _'Fuck, now I can't get Duke outta my mind. Oh well, might as well start memorising for tomorrow...'_

XXXXXX

Hey, Slushie Addict here! Before you guys say anything, I _am_ keeping my promise of the next few chapters being practice based! Oh yeah, I was thinking, how the fuck should I differentiate the lines from real conversation? Like, I used italics for the lines within the song that sound like a commentary, make the lines that sound like lyrics be smack right in the centre, but I also use italics for calls too. When Chandler called Veronica, I made the dialogue on the other person's end in italics. What do you guys think? How should I go about it, or is my method okay with you guys? Lemme know what you guys think about it, and thanks for reading up to here!


	5. Chapter 5

Hey guys, Slushie Addict here! So first of all, I'm back from a so called hiatus! Haha! I didn't have the motivation to do up this chapter even though I had a rough idea and the fact that my exams are looming nearer! Anyways, since you guys didn't call me out on the method I used to do the lyrics, I'm just gonna continue with it. Okay, so guys are gonna fall at my feet to help me cheat and I don't own Heathers!

XXXXXX

"Man, Calculus was a pain in the neck..." Veronica groaned to herself, with Heather (McNamara) walking beside her. They were in the same Calculus class, so it made sense for them to walk together now that they were friends. Veronica would have wanted to walk with Martha or JD, but they were unfortunately in another Calculus class that ended 30 minutes after hers. Veronica wouldn't mind walking with Heather (Duke), but she was taking different subjects.

"You're telling me. You passed the pop quiz we did last week." Heather (McNamara) replied, crushing her pop quiz paper with her right hand. "I fucking failed the quiz."

"I didn't expect you to be bad at Maths."

"Hah! You should hear what Duke has to say about my grades. She said that apart from English, I fucking suck at the other subjects."

"Even your foreign language class?" Veronica asked, expecting Heather (McNamara) to be good at languages. "Wait, what _is_ your foreign language anyway? I don't recall seeing you in French..."

"I take German. Chandler takes French, and Duke takes Korean. And no, I'm good with languages. I can swear in at least five different languages remember?" Heather (McNamara) scowled, tossing her paper into a nearby dustbin. "It's fucking cheating I swear, she's half-Korean for fuck's sake!"

"You mean Duke right?"

"Duh, know any other Asians around here?"

"Well..." Veronica was about to say that Mr Zaly was half-Asian too but decided not to say it. "Oh right, random thought. Do you guys have a Heathers-only chat group?"

"Yeah, it's pretty recent. Why the sudden question?"

"Nothing, just a random thought. I mean, I'm in a chat group with JD, Martha and Pauline. Granted, Pauline mutes it most of the time but she does respond whenever we call her." Veronica held up her phone, scrolling through her chat history. "Oh shit, Chandler just texted me."

"Lemme see." Heather (McNamara) requested, glancing at her best friend's message.

 _Chandler: [Hello Veronica, this is Heather!]_

 _Chandler: [Heather Chandler I mean.]_

 _Veronica: [Oh hey Chandler, you need something?]_

 _Chandler: [Not really, I just wanted to say hi via text!]_

 _Chandler: [Heather said that I should tell McNamara to hurry it up, but I'm not too sure if I should...]_

 _Veronica: [Why not?]_

 _Chandler: [Well, I don't want to annoy her?]_

 _Chandler: [She has Calculus today, and she hates that subject the most.]_

 _Veronica: [Ooh okay, makes sense...]_

 _Veronica: [Heather fking chandler, i dun give a shit abt it]_

 _Veronica: [Oh right, I forgot to tell you that Mac's beside me!]_

 _Chandler: [Chandler OD mode, its duke now]_

"OD?! What does that mean?!" Veronica asked Heather (McNamara), who shook her head with the same amount of confusion Veronica had. "Anyways, we gotta go for practice before Mr Allen flips his shit at us."

"Good call, stop flirting with Duke already." Heather (McNamara) teased, running towards the auditorium and leaving Veronica behind.

 _Veronica: [Mac's headed for the auditorium, see you there?]_

 _Chandler: [K]_

 _Chandler: [God, keep this up n the real chandler will think tht ur flirting with her]_

 _Chandler: [Lol]_

 _Chandler: [But srsly, im gonna give it bk to her]_

"Veronica?! Where are you going?" Heather (McNamara) asked, poking her head out of the auditorium. "You have just overshot!"

"Shit, sorry." Veronica mumbled an apology, quickly making a U-turn and entering the auditorium.

XXXXXX

"So today we're gonna do 'Candy Store'. I trust that the three of you have learnt the dance moves?" Mr Allen instructed, waiting for the Heathers to respond. Veronica rolled her eyes, it was stupid of Mr Allen to assume that three high school students could learn a series of complex dance moves within days. Hell, even the Broadway performers hired a choreographer to train them!

"Um, no...?" Heather (Duke) was the one who answered, which resulted in an angry glare from Mr Allen. "We're sorry, but it's pretty hard to remember them."

"And coordinate." Heather (McNamara) quipped. Heather (Chandler) said nothing, but the way she bit her lip suggested that she agreed with the other two Heathers. Meanwhile, Mr Allen looked as though he was about to blow a fuse. "... What's your damage teach? What do you think we are, award-winning dancers?!"

"... The three of you will watch the song, and remember as many dance moves as you can within 15 minutes. The rest of you, practice your lines." Mr Allen seethed, storming out of the auditorium only to run into Mr Zaly. "Move it Paki."

"What's his problem? Hey kids, did you guys piss Allen off again?" Mr Zaly asked, with Ms Religion giving him a quick bob of her head. "Eve, what the shit happened just now?"

"Just told him that we haven't memorised the fucking dance for 'Candy Store'." Heather (McNamara) replied, her eyes glued to the laptop screen that was playing the very video they had to watch. "All I remember is that Chandler has to sing most of it."

"C-Can I just lip-sync the song instead? There's a lot of rude words in there..." Heather (Chandler) requested, with everyone giving her an 'are you serious' look. "B-But I don't want to say b-words, d-words and p-words! She's so mean..."

"Just lick it up baby." Heather (McNamara) replied, patting Heather (Chandler)'s shoulder. Heather (Chandler) let out a soft whine as she continued to watch the video. "You know, Duke and Chandler sound similar in the video."

"Should I be glad that we don't sound the same in real life?" Heather (Duke) asked, trying her best to differentiate which lines belonged to which Heather. "Like, my voice is lower."

"And sexier."

"Heather McNamara!"

"Nyeh nyeh~"

"You two, please don't fight now!" Heather (Chandler) tried to stop the fight, but her efforts were useless. Veronica sighed, it was always Heather Chandler that had to run damage control on the other two Heathers. JD smirked from a corner of the auditorium, while Martha and Ram were chatting among themselves about a date this coming Sunday.

"I've realised that apart from me and Allen, the rest of the teachers aren't suited to be in charge of a musical?" Ms Religion commented, with Mr Zaly nodding in agreement. "Well, not like I actually want to be here."

"Speaking of which... how did Mr Allen convince Ms Religion to participate? I mean, she teaches History even though she's forced to teach some English classes." Veronica asked, a question that was on her mind for quite a while now. "Mrs Suzie teaches English, so I guess it's related. Mr Zaly's teaching Physics but we all know that Mr Allen blackmailed him or something."

"What? No, getting blackmailed was Suzie! I lost to him in a bet, and Eve here was also blackmailed... in a way." Mr Zaly replied, with Ms Religion groaning in embarrassment. "Oh c'mon Eve, at least it wasn't circulated around yet..."

"Feh, I hope I can delete that video soon. If my parents see that, they'll send me to a religious camp during summer break. I'm 28 for crying out loud!" Ms Religion explained, crossing her arms while Mr Zaly sniggered. "Hussein, stop laughing."

"Don't call me that. Please." Mr Zaly begged, getting down on his knees. "It's bad enough that I'm named after a Middle Eastern dictator, don't rub it in Eve."

"Ooooookay, I can see that you guys have some drama going on and I _don't_ want to be a part of it." Veronica declared, making her way to the stage where Roger, Alfred, and Pauline were. "Please tell me you guys are talking shit about some cat video and not about something heavy."

"We're talking about how Chandler is starting to look more normal." Pauline replied, tugging on her grey scarf. "Fuck, why am I still required to wear this?!"

"I have no idea, you should ask Mr Allen later when he gets back." Roger replied, glaring at the Heathers. "... Tch, they should have practiced the dance at home..."

"Charcoal, don't be like that. It's the second session, and besides you know Mac can't practice during detention." Alfred came to the Heathers' defence, notably Heather (McNamara)'s.

"She can't practice during detention?" Veronica asked, she had never once attended detention in her whole life so she wouldn't know. Alfred and Roger nodded, while Pauline shrugged. "Man, that... that sounds boring."

"Detention is a time for troublemakers to buckle down and study. Or so the school says." Pauline added, her brown eyes darting to the right where Mr Allen was seen to be re-entering the auditorium. "Ah shit, Mr Allen's back."

"Okay you little cum stains, you better get your asses up on stage and not fuck up." Mr Allen cursed, scaring Heather (Chandler) and Martha. Heather (McNamara) rolled her eyes while Heather (Duke) playfully stuck out her tongue. They complied with the instructions given, though Heather (Chandler) tripped and landed flat on her face. "Chandler! What did I tell you about not fucking up?!"

XXXXXX

 _"Are we gonna have a problem?! You got a bone to pick? You've come so far, why now are you pulling on my skirt?!"_ Heather (Chandler) sounded threatening, and even Mr Allen saw that. It would be better if she wasn't purposely substituting words that she deem 'rude' with words that sound less 'rude'.

"Cut! Chandler, we all know that you hate cussing. But seriously, just move on already! We are following the Broadway version, so I expect you to cuss till no tomorrow!" Heather (Chandler) gulped, she really wished that Heather (McNamara) swapped roles with her. She turned to said girl and gave a pleading look, which the latter ignored in purpose. "Okay Chandler, just do it for the sake of the musical. And... action!"

 _"Are we gonna have a problem?! You got a bone to pick? You've come so far, why now are you pulling on my clit?!"_

"Cut! Okay, what was that?!" Mr Allen stopped Heather (Chandler) again, this time for a completely new reason. "Good job on saying something remotely inappropriate, but why changing it to 'clit'?"

"Um... because females don't exactly have penises...? I mean, it's not anatomically correct even though the clitoris has almost the same functions as the penis..." Heather (Chandler) explained, causing the other two Heathers and Veronica to smile in amusement. "H-Hey! Don't smile like that!"

"... Just stick to the lines alright?" Mr Allen sighed, silently admitting that Heather (Chandler) was taking it seriously and chose to let her mistakes slide. "Action!"

 _"Are we gonna have a problem?! You got a bone to pick? You've come so far, why now are you pulling on my dick?! I'd normally slap your face off, and everyone here could watch! But I'm feeling nice, here's some advice, listen up BIATCH."_ Heather (Chandler) smirked, even going as far as to push Veronica away right as the music to 'Candy Store' played. The three of them started to dance, thankfully for them the first half was just some hip swaying and hip thrusting. And of course, showing off their figures.

 _I like!_

 _Lookin' hot, buying stuff they cannot!_

 _I like!_

 _Drinkin' hard, maxing dad's credit card!_

 _I like!_

 _Skipping gym, scaring her, screwin' him!_

 _Killer clothes, kickin' nerds in the nose! *RIIIIP*_

"CUT! What the fuck was that sound?!" Mr Allen yelled, pausing the session. Everyone looked around to see what the source of noise was, except for Heather (McNamara). Heather (Duke) noticed, and realised that she was the source of the sound.

"Um, Mac? That wasn't you farting or something right?"

"If it was just that, it'll be great. I think I ripped my undies during that kick." Heather (McNamara) replied, a blush sported across her face as she pulled down her yellow skirt. "... You uh, got any spares?"

"Even if I do, they aren't in your size."

"Fuck. Now what should I do?"

"Admit to Mr Allen that it was your panties that got busted?"

"I would rather die that tell that to him."

"Then what do you want to do? Dance around in a pair of ripped panties?!"

"... Got it." Heather (McNamara) took a deep breath, and casually made her way towards the exit of the auditorium. "While you guys hunt for the source, I'm gonna take a piss. Have fun fucking yourselves finding that rip!"

"Duke? What are the chances of her coming back with her underwear?" Heather (Chandler) asked, having overheard the conversation. Heather (Duke) shrugged, giving the other Heather a pointed look. "... I think I'll give the her the benefit of doubt and say that she's coming back with something underneath her skirt."

"... Wanna bet?"

"O-Oh no, I don't gamble."

"It's just a dare. Loser flicks Veronica on the forehead?" Heather (Duke) suggested, offering Heather (Chandler) a very tame dare. Hell, it probably wasn't considered a dare at all. Heather (Chandler) reluctantly agreed, slowly nodding her head. "Sweet. Alrighty, I think I see Mac coming back."

"Alright, pissing session over! So, found the noise yet?" Heather (McNamara) came back after five minutes had passed, with everyone but the Heathers still none the wiser. She hurried back to the Heathers, who were paying extra attention to her skirt. "... What?"

"A-Are you wearing... something decent underneath?" Heather (Chandler) was the one to ask the question, with Heather (McNamara) looking back at her as though it was obvious. "... McNamara, you're my bestest friend, but I really don't know if you'll actually wear something underneath or not..."

"Well duh, I wasn't going to come back without _anything_. Oh right, Duke, I used some of your masking tape and taped up my pussy. Hope you don't mind." Heather (McNamara) said, not realising that what she had just revealed wasn't anywhere near covering up herself. Heather (Duke) and Heather (Chandler) simply stared back at their friend, unsure what expression should they wear on their faces.

"... Does this count as my win or yours?" Heather (Duke) ignored Heather (McNamara), choosing to ask Heather (Chandler) who won the bet. Heather (Chandler) shook her head, just as lost as Heather (Duke). "Well fuck. I didn't expect Mac to be such a pillowcase."

"Who the fuck are you calling a pillowcase?!"

XXXXXX

 _If you lack the balls, you can go play dolls. Let your mommy fix you a SNACK!_

 _Whoa!_

 _Or you could come smoke, pound some rum and coke, in my Porsche with the quarterback!_

 _Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!_

 _Honey, whatchu waitin' for? Welcome to my candy store!_

 _Time for you to prove you're not a loser anymore! And step into my candy store..._

 _Guys fall! At your feet, pay the check, help you cheat!_

 _All you! Gotta do, say goodbye to Shamoo!_

 _That freak's! Not your friend, I can tell in the end._

 _If she! Had your shot, she would leave you to rot!_

 _'Course if you don't care, fine, go braid her hair! Maybe Sesame Street is on!_

 _Whoa!_

 _Or forget that creep, and get in my jeep!_

 _Let's go tear up someone's lawn!_

 _Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!_

 _Honey, whatchu waitin' for? Welcome to my candy store!_

 _You just gotta prove you're not a pussy anymore! And step into my candy store...!_

 _You can join the team... or you can bitch and moan!_

 _You can live the dream... or you can die alone!_

 _You can fly with eagles or if you prefer, keep on testing me and end up like HER!_

The three Heathers were now rocking their hips from side to side, their pointed fingers slowly moving closer to their hips. They each had a mocking smile on their faces, waiting for the exchange between Veronica and Martha to unfold.

 _"Veronica, look! Ram invited me to his homecoming party! This proves he's been thinking about me!"_ Martha gushed, completely love-struck after reading the forged note. Veronica paled, turning back to look at the Heathers. Heather (Chandler) cocked her head to one side, indicating that Veronica had a choice to tell Martha the truth at a cost.

 _"... Colour me stoked..."_ Veronica mumbled, averting her eyes away from Martha's out of guilt.

 _"I'm so happy!"_ Martha excitedly replied, going off the stage. Veronica wanted to stop her, but it was too late. Meanwhile, Heather (Duke) decided to steal the limelight by inserting herself into the main part of the song.

 _"Whooooa-ooo-oh! Honey, whatchu waitin' for-"_ Heather (Duke) started, but was swiftly cut off by Heather (Chandler) with a punch to her abdomen. "Oof?!"

"CUT! Oh my god, Duke are you alright?!" Mr Allen asked, but didn't make a move to help Heather (Duke), who was groaning on the floor. Veronica and the other two Heathers rushed to her aid, checking up on Heather (Duke).

"Duke! Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! How bad is it?!" Heather (Chandler) asked, trying her very best to ease the pain by pressing her hand on to the place where she punched her best friend.

"... You knocked the wind outta me... owie..." Heather (Duke) groaned, weakly smiling at her friends.

"Wow Chandler, that's some punch you threw just now." Heather (McNamara) commented, with Heather (Duke) groaning to emphasise her point. "Should we take her to the nurse?"

"Of course! What kind of a question is that?!" Veronica snapped, supporting Heather (Duke) on one side. "Mac, take the other side. Chandler's too tall to support Duke."

"Well fuck." Heather (McNamara) sighed, complying with Veronica after she gave her a death glare. The three of the left the auditorium, prompting Mr Allen to find out why did Heather (Chandler) punch Heather (Duke).

"Chandler, I thought I told you to slap her! You even asked me which side!"

"Y-Yeah, but I forgot... so I thought maybe punching would be a good option..."

"It was just _yesterday_ for Christ's sake!" Mr Allen groaned, slapping his forehead in frustration. "Well fuck, Veronica and Mac are gone, can't ask them to sing their solos. Ah! JD! You sing 'Freeze Your Brain' right now!"

"What? Can't you just like, end practice earlier and let us motor?" JD asked, making his way to the stage nonetheless.

"The drink machines are behind the stage, so sing your part and you'll get your soda."

"Really? Okay guys, let's start practice!" JD beamed, easily lured by the promise of enjoying a drink afterwards. The main cast had mixed reactions, but they were mostly amused by his child-like mentality whenever it comes to sodas. They found it cute, except for Pauline, but that was because she was a die-hard slushie fan. "Hey teach, who's gonna stand in for Ronnie?"

"At first, it'll be Chandler because _she_ fucked up the session so god damn badly." Mr Allen glared at Heather (Chandler), making her shrink in fear. Many thought it was almost comical to see a girl standing at 1.84 metres reduced to a shaking mess just by glaring. Almost. "But since this song requires the performers with good chemistry, Pauline will be standing in. And because Chandler has a small part to play in the scene."

"Why me?!" Pauline angrily asked, starting to remove her scarf. It may be autumn, but the auditorium was hot due to the number of people present. "How the fuck do I have 'good chemistry' with Dean?!"

"Considering that I heard Veronica claim that you touched JD's dick for real, and the fact that you guys hang out at 7-11 even though you hate each other drink choices, it's safe for me to say that you guys are good friends." Mr Allen replied, motioning for Pauline to go up on stage and stand near to JD. "Backstage crew, bring out the slushie machine!"

"Urgh, I hate slushies." JD complained, tugging on his trench coat. "Fuck, it sure is hot in here."

"I know right? Thank god for the free drinks later." Pauline agreed, starting to remove her coat. The backstage crew wheeled out the slushie machine, with two flavours in it. "The school sure had enough money to splurge on two flavours. There's actually cherry and lime in there."

"And action!" Mr Allen yelled, making Mr Zaly wince back in pain. Ms Religion on the other hand, was already used to it thanks to yesterday's episode.

 _"At a 7-11? Swanky first date."_ Pauline started, mentally thanking herself for knowing Veronica's lines. JD shrugged, casually picking up a cup as he narrows the distance between them.

 _"Hey, I love this place."_

 _"No offence, but why?"_ JD took a steadying breath as he entered into a song that told 'Veronica' the virtues of a 7-11.

 _I've been to ten high schools, they start to get blurry._

 _No point planting roots, cause you're gone in a hurry._

 _My dad keeps two suitcases packed in the den, so it's only a matter of when..._

 _I don't learn the names, don't bother with faces._

 _All I can trust is this concrete oasis._

 _Seems every time I'm about to despair, there's a 7-11 right there!_

 _Each store is the same, from Las Vegas to Boston!_

 _Linoleum aisles I love to get lost in!_

 _I pray at my altar of slush... yeah I live for that sweet sugared rush...!_

"CUT! JD!" Mr Allen roared, with JD wincing in pain as he proceeded to consume the slushie. "It's not 'sugared'! It's 'frozen'!"

"S-S-Slip-u-u-up..." JD fumbled out, his teeth were still in pain as he tried his best to bear with it. "C-C-Continue?"

"Yes!"

 _Freeze your brain... Suck on that straw, get lost in the pain!_

 _Happiness comes, when everything hurts, who needs cocaine?!_

 _Just freeze your brain..._

 _"Care for a hit?"_ JD asked, offering his cup to 'Veronica'. She was supposed to refuse the offer, but being the die-hard slushie fan, she immediately grabbed the cup and started to suck on the straw, getting a brain freeze afterwards. "Uh Fleming? You're... not supposed to get a brain freeze now."

"Oh fuck it. You know I love slushies!" Pauline replied, gulping down the ice-cold drink. The rest all stared in amazement, Mr Allen included, as they watch Pauline gulp down the drink like it was water. "Ahhhh~ Hey Dean, refill my cup for me. Get me cherry this time."

"Stop stop stop! Pauline, stop drinking! Oh god, what have I done?!" Mr Allen groaned, with JD refilling the cup with cherry flavoured slushie instead. "JD, I said stop!"

XXXXXX

"Oh yeah Chandler, you said that you have two siblings right? I know you have a brother, but what about the other one?" Veronica asked Heather (Chandler). They were going back together, since Veronica and Heather (Duke) lived pretty close by (something that neither of them knew until that day). Heather (Chandler) smiled sadly, making Veronica regret asking that question. "Shit, I fucked up right?"

"It's fine. I'm sure Mrs Sawyer was bound to ask my mother at one point. My sister is in a coma. She was involved in a kidnapping and hit her head on a table." Veronica wasn't sure if she should comfort Heather (Chandler), but she did place a hand on the taller girl's shoulder even though it was an awkward hand. "It's been five years, and the doctors said that she's probably not going to wake up any time soon. Father wanted to pull the plug on her but my mother said no... saying that she could wake up one day..."

"The bills must be heavy on her now that she's filing for a divorce..."

"I think it should be fine. I hope. Anyways, what did the nurse say about Duke?" Heather (Chandler) decided to change topics, relieving Veronica.

"Oh, she's fine. The nurse said to not punch her again though." Veronica replied, glancing behind them. The other two Heathers were chatting, with Pauline busy checking all of her missed messages on her chat app. "How did you three get together anyways? You three have nearly nothing in common, save for the names."

"They became friends in third grade after McNamara copied off Duke's homework, while I became friends with them after they saved me from some bullies in sixth grade. I was the new kid then, and after saving me, they invited me to join them at their table for lunch. We talked and well, I guess that's it." Heather (Chandler) smiled, the memory coming back to her instantly. "Speaking of friendship, Jason and Pauline were asked to act 'Freeze Your Brain' just now. Pauline wasn't so keen on playing your role though."

"Well, acting other roles you're not used to is pretty tough. I mean, being yourself is already hard enough and you also have to be like others. That's fucking hard on someone."

"Oh no, you misunderstood. She wasn't keen as she didn't like being associated with Jason as friends."

"Huh, funny. I remember SOMEONE touching a guy's DICK." Veronica raised her voice, prompting Pauline to respond.

"Shut up Sawyer. All I did was to touch his junk, these two over here actually fucked." Pauline pointed to the other two Heathers, who were no longer chatting among themselves.

"We were fucking drunk you fucking bitch." Heather (McNamara) clenched her fists, leaving marks on her left palm. Heather (Duke) said nothing but one look at her expression told everyone that she was sick of being reminded that she had sex with her best friend. Pauline noticed this, and decided not to say anything about the subject but didn't apologise. "Fuck. Anyways Duke, are you sure you're able to attend practice tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I just have to take care of my nose." Their phones buzzed, indicating a message most likely from the main cast group.

 _ **sweeneytodd renamed the group from 'main cast' to 'nine chosen ones'.**_

 _JD: [what the fk dude?]_

 _Fleming: [What JD just said]_

 _JD: [srsly, why do u only call me tht online?]_

 _Fleming: [It's shorter]_

 _sweeneytodd: [oh cmon guys, it sounds cool]_

 _Veronica: [I have a good mind to mute this group right now Ram.]_

 _McNamara: [rt]_

 _Duke: [rt]_

 _Fleming: [Rt]_

 _Chandler: [Wait, what does 'rt' mean?]_

 _KK: [retweet, liek u know on twitter?]_

 _Duke: [chandler doesnt hv twitter u dope]_

 _KK: [isnt her talent hcking or smth liek tht?]_

 _Chandler: [Hacking doesn't mean I require a Twitter account, or a FaceBook account, or an Instagram account, or a Tumblr account...]_

 _JD: [we get ur point, ur a social recluse on the net]_

 _Chandler: [That sounds ugly...]_

 _Marthabear: [ram, maybe u shld tell them what you want to say?]_

 _sweeneytodd: [right right, allenman just said that practice will be limited to twice a week bcuz the p said every day's too much]_

 _Chandler: [Who's 'the p'?]_

 _Veronica: [The principal.]_

 _Chandler: [Thanks Veronica_ ^^ _]_

 _Duke: [i find it funny tht they r beside each other yet veronica answered chandler via text]_

 _sweeneytodd: [if its v its possible]_

 _Veronica: [Screw yourself. Is that all?]_

 _sweeneytodd: [no, he said tht ppl who failed at least a subject will be banned from practice until they passed]_

 _McNamara_ _: [fk]_

 _Chandler: [I'm going to delete that message because I don't want to have a naughty word in my messaging app.]_

 _Duke: [whn you get in bed with her, shes probably gonna say a lot more thn just fk]_

 _McNamara_ _: [duke I swear to god i will KILL u ltr!]_

 _Duke: [wow u even use punctuation marks, ur really angry now?]_

 _McNamara_ _: [take a good look at whr my right hand is now]_

 _Fleming: [Update: Mac is about to punch Duke with her metal arm]_

 _Marthabear: [noooooo dun do tht!]_

 _Marthabear: [it will hurt a lot_ T_T _]_

 _McNamara_ _: [thts the point martyha]_

 _KK: [anyways, how r ur grades? mine is bad]_

 _Veronica: [Unless yours is like Mac's, I would say that you're alright.]_

 _McNamara_ _: [remeber tht i m behind u]_

 _Veronica: [You fucking failed Calculus!]_

 _McNamara_ _: [most of us failed!]_

 _Veronica: [You got a 0! And the answers were all crap!]_

 _McNamara_ _: [how wld u know?!]_

 _Veronica: [I sit IN FRONT of you in class?!]_

 _McNamara_ _: [shit]_

 _Duke: [this is hilarous]_

 _Duke: [guys can we stop at 7-11, i wanna buy some popcorn for this shit]_

 _Fleming: [Rt]_

 _Chandler: [Didn't you eat that yesterday? Is popcorn even healthy to begin with?]_

 _JD: [fk i wanna go 7-11 too]_

 _JD: [flmng whatcha buying there?]_

 _Fleming: [I don't know, maybe my dinner? Parents aren't home]_

 _JD: [k im tagging along, i wanna eat some soft boiled eggs]_

 _Marthabear: [that's super unhealthy guys!]_

 _Fleming: [Fuck it]_

 _JD: [rt]_

 _sweeneytodd: [guys wht abt our grades?!]_

 _sweeneytodd: [im failing too!]_

 _Veronica: [Like I said, Mac is the benchmark here.]_

 _Marthabear: [isn't she the worst?]_

 _McNamara_ _: [i wld punch u too if only ur not a pure soul]_

 _McNamara_ _: [ok how abt this, everyone say their failing subject in here]_

 _McNamara_ _: [thn we figure out from thr]_

 _McNamara_ _: [i start, i failed everything but languages]_

 _Chandler: [Are you always this bad?]_

 _McNamara_ _: [yea]_

 _Duke: [well im not failing but my physics is slipping, im getting a C now]_

 _KK: [failing english, maths, bio n lit]_

 _Veronica: [Speaking of literature, Mac you even fail that?!]_

 _McNamara_ _: [mr george hates me cuz i submitted a bld soaked essay once, so he always marks me down bad even though i top the class]_

 _sweeneytodd: [i send tht to allenman later, thts fked up man]_

 _McNamara_ _: [tks ram]_

 _Fleming: [I'm getting a F for Chemistry]_

 _JD: [i kinda need help in sign language]_

 _Veronica: [What the fuck, we have that here?]_

 _Chandler: [Oh I can help you in that, my mother and my sister is deaf so I can teach you!]_

 _Duke: [wait ur mom is deaf?! she spoke to u just fine last night?!]_

 _Chandler: [She is deaf, not Deaf.]_

 _Duke: [whaaaaaat]_

 _Chandler: [She's hard of hearing, and if you noticed, she wears hearing aids?]_

 _Duke: [oh]_

 _Chandler: [My sister is Deaf, which means that she can't hear anything.]_

 _Veronica: [Okay well, I'm not doing so well in First Aid class, I'm getting a B.]_

 _Marthabear: [this is getting confusing]_

 _Marthabear: [can we meet up on Saturday to help each other out?]_

 _Marthabear: [pls respond?]_

 _Veronica: [Okay, sure, time?]_

 ** _Marthabear renamed the group from 'nine chosen ones' to 'this saturday 9am at ram's study group'._**

 _Veronica: [Wow you sure are lazy.]_

 _KK: [rt dude]_

 _Duke: [u call her lazy, i call her smart]_

 _JD: [dun encourage her duke]_

"Seriously though Duke, that's pretty lazy even for her." Veronica commented, logging out of the app. Heather (Duke) shrugged, placing her headphones over her ears. "Way to run away from a conversation!"

"She's not running away, she's just playing her games right now and she wants to hear the audio." Heather (McNamara) replied, looking around her surroundings. "Wait, where's the student council bitch?!"

"At a 7-11?" Heather (Chandler) replied, scrolling through the conversation. "Oh dear, I have quite a few texts to delete..."

"Chandler, it's okay to have words like 'fuck' in there." Veronica sighed, unable to grasp what was so bad about a few swear words.

"Is there a filter app for such words in the app store? I'm thinking that I might need one."

"If such a thing exists, it might block every single text from Mac."

"... That's true."

XXXXXX

For starters, I have no idea what the fuck does 'rt' actually mean. I have no idea whether people use it to mean 'real time' or 'retweet' so I'm just gonna go with the latter. And really USA?! Anything below 60 is a failing grade?! You guys set super-duper high expectations, like really, a failing grade is below 50% over here and we are far more competitive than you guys! The next chapter is unfortunately not about practice, and it means that I have to go study up on the subjects an American high school student takes. Seriously though, while the subjects are pretty interesting at high school level, some of them are pretty weird. Still don't understand how is 'yard care' an actual subject in the life skills section... Well whatever, I'm off to study up so the American readers don't fuck me up over how little knowledge I possess.


	6. Chapter 6

Hey, Slushie Addict here! Okay, I still don't get the education system in USA but I'm gonna try as much as I can. Really confusing though, with so many subjects and all. Either the schools have a hell lot of funds to support the numerous subjects offered, or they're literally getting anyone who has basic knowledge on that subject to teach. What can I say, I really don't know how things work over there. It's a double-chapter update because I got this done up way earlier. Anyways, I don't own Heathers!

XXXXXX

"Okay so, studying time. I don't even know what subjects do you guys take." Veronica said, entering Ram's house with Martha and Mr Zaly behind them. "By the way, who invited Mr Zaly over?"

"That would be me." Heather (Duke) said, holding a purple file that was stuffed full of papers. "I'm getting a C remember? And Mac really needs help in Physics too."

"At least I'm getting above 20 percent now." Heather (McNamara) replied, crossing her arms. Mr Zaly sighed, this wasn't how he wanted to spend his weekend. He wanted to spend his weekend binge-watching war movies with his dog, but he was 'asked' to come over and help two of his students in Physics. Worse still, he wasn't allowed to bring his dog over as Pauline was cynophobic, hence her dislike and fear towards canines. "Are you still hung up over your fucking dog?"

"Please don't put it like that. You make it sound like my dog is solely for sexual pleasure." Mr Zaly groaned, solidifying his desire to not be present at Ram's house. "And yeah, I miss Snowy..."

"Mr Zaly, you're from Pakistan. Doesn't that make you a Muslim, which means you're not supposed to rear dogs?" Veronica asked, getting a can of orange juice from Ram's fridge. "Why not get a cat?"

"One, cats hate me for some reason. Two, I'm not a Muslim so it's fine. My personal beliefs conflict with Islam, so I decided to simply be a freethinker. I don't have to be a believer just because I respect a religion. Don't tell the others that though, it's actually a sensitive topic here and I don't want to get killed by extremists. Not many know that I was a Muslim." Mr Zaly explained, taking a seat next to Heather (Chandler). "Anyways, it's just yellow and green that need help in Physics right? No one else?"

"No, Chandler takes Botany instead of Physics. The rest... actually, I'm not too sure about them. But I don't think they're taking Physics either..." Heather (Duke) replied, taking a few moments to reflect if there was anyone apart from them that took Physics. "... Veronica, what are the science-based subjects that Pauline takes?"

"Geology, oceanology and meteorology. She also takes Chemistry considering that she's always asking us for help, and... I think she also takes Biology?"

"That's the student council president for you guys." Mr Zaly muttered at the exact moment Pauline, JD and Ms Religion entered the house. "Eve?! What are you doing here?"

"Ram, Kurt and Veronica requested me for History lessons. Honestly, I have no idea why do you three need me when your grades are alright. Thank god Heather is aware that her grades are perfectly fine..." Ms Religion sighed, entering the kitchen to help herself to a drink in the fridge. "Is there any root beer in this fridge?"

"Nope, my family hates root beer with a passion. They say that it tastes like crap." Ram replied, holding a stack of notes and placing them on the dining table. "Okay, I brought my history notes out!"

"... Should I be glad that only the three of you are only asking me about World History? If Heather is thrown into the mix then who knows what shenanigans am I subjected to later..." Ms Religion commented, settling for a can of beer. "I'm surprised McNamara didn't get any teachers for herself apart from Mr Zaly. From what the faculty knows, she's failing everything but her languages and British Literature."

"Wow, Mr Allen really did fucking help." Heather (McNamara) commented, smiling slightly now that she knew that she passed one more subject. "Anyways, I'm thinking of getting Veronica to help me with Calculus once she's done with you."

"That sounds fair, you share most of her classes with her anyways." Martha agreed, holding up some notes on Biology. "Who takes Bio here? I want to improve my grades too!"

"Isn't that a compulsory subject for all in Ohio?" Heather (Duke) replied, pulling out some pieces of paper. "You know what, fuck it. Since none of us know what subjects do we actually take, let's just write it down and see which are the common subjects we share."

"That sounds lovely. You guys fill that up while I get more beer for myself." Ms Religion said, going back into the kitchen to get herself more cans of beer. Mr Zaly sighed, following after her.

"Eve, don't drink at a student's house for fuck's sake. You don't want to have a repeat of what happened last time right?" The nine of them didn't say anything, but they were curious to know what had happened to Ms Religion when she got herself drunk. It was JD who broke the silence afterwards.

"Hey Chandler, you think you can hack the net and find out what happened to her?"

"Chandler, don't bother. Mr Zaly said that the video wasn't circulated yet, and Ms Religion hoped to delete that video soon. That implies that the video is still with Mr Allen considering that he blackmailed the teachers to help out in the musical." Veronica quickly dismissed JD's question, but was surprised by Heather (Chandler)'s answer.

"I can hack Mr Allen's phone to access his photo album, but all of you must promise not to circulate it around." Heather (Chandler) replied, with the eight of them nodding. "Okay, I'll hack later. Right now, we should study."

"... Um, how do you know how to hack into someone's phone?" Martha asked, disturbed that Heather (Chandler) knew how to hack.

"... I had to learn so that I can protect my mother from my father online." Heather (Chandler) replied, but her tone ended the conversation immediately. They went back to filling up their subject combinations on the papers distributed. After 30 minutes, they were done filling up their papers. Ram the went over to the visualiser and switched it on. The other eight placed the papers on the table, with Ram taking one to show it on the screen.

 _ **[Veronica Sawyer's subject list**_

 _ **English**_

 _ **Creative Writing: A  
**_ _ **Journalism: A  
**_ _ **English IV: A  
**_ _ **British Literature: A**_

 _ **Science**_

 _ **Biology: A  
Advanced Biology: A  
Astrology: A**_

 _ **Maths**_

 _ **Calculus: B  
Algebra I: A  
Algebra II: A  
Accounting: A**_

 _ **Social Studies**_

 _ **Political Science: A  
World History: B  
Government: B**_

 _ **Physical Education**_

 _ **Outdoor Survival Skills: A**_

 _ **Health**_

 _ **First Aid: B**_

 _ **Electives**_

 _ **French: A  
Philosophy: B  
Statistics: A  
Psychology: A  
Theatre Arts: A]**_

"Sheesh V, you're a high-flying achiever! You don't need to be here!" Ram shook his head, placing the next piece of paper underneath the visualiser.

"Hang on, why isn't she required to take Physical Sciences or American History?!" JD asked, crossing his arms. "Like, astrology _is_ a physical science... but why not the general subject as a whole?! And seriously, no American History?! You take Government as a class for fuck's sake!"

"I made a convincing case to the principal when we were choosing our subjects. I also convinced him that American History is affected by World History, so yeah he said okay to it." Veronica replied, laughing softly. "Good thing too, I'm not good at Physics or Chemistry."

"I didn't know students can ask for such changes." Mr Zaly whispered to Ms Religion, who was already drunk. "... How the fuck did you get wasted within 30 minutes?!"

"Drink nine cans within half an hour... and plus, we exploited the requirements at my high school..."

"Weren't you from Las Vegas?"

"LA Hussein... I'm from California..."

"... You're really out of it, you better sober up after this."

 _ **[JD's subject list**_

 _ **English**_

 ** _American lit: B  
Poetry: B  
Grammar: A  
Debate: A_**

 ** _Science_**

 _ **Bio: C  
Physical Science: C  
Forensic Science: B**_

 _ **Maths**_

 _ **Calculus: B  
Algebra II: C  
Statistics: B  
Accounting: B**_

 _ **Social**_ _ **Studies**_

 _ **American history: A  
Government: A  
Economics: A**_

 _ **PE**_

 _ **Gymnastics: A**_

 _ **Health**_

 _ **First-aid: A**_

 _ **Electives**_

 _ **Sign language: D  
Psychology: A  
Philosophy: A  
Social Skills: B  
Critical Thinking: A]**_

"Should we be disturbed that you actually took Social Skills as a subject?" Kurt asked, aware that the subject included teaching students how communicate efficiently with peers.

"I transfer schools fairly often, so I'm not so good with socialising." JD replied, giving Heather (Chandler) a smug smile. "Besides, I'm not the only one here who takes that subject. And unlike that person, I'm getting decent grades at socialising."

"You're starting to resemble crazy JD. Especially the fact that you're so damn good at Psychology and Government..." Veronica commented, with Ram nodding in agreement. He took the next piece of paper from the stack and placed it under the visualiser, cutting himself on the finger.

"Ow. Fuck, is cutting my finger on paper a thing now?"

 _ **[P. Fleming's subject list**_

 _ **English**_

 ** _American Lit: A  
Poetry: D  
Grammar: A  
Debate: A_**

 ** _Science_**

 _ **Biology: A  
Physical Science: A  
Chemistry: F**_

 _ **Maths**_

 _ **Trigonometry: A  
Algebra II: A  
Statistics: A  
Geometry: A**_

 _ **Social**_ _ **Studies**_

 _ **American history: B  
Government: B  
Civics: A**_

 _ **PE**_

 _ **Cycling: B**_

 _ **Health**_

 _ **First-aid: A**_

 _ **Electives**_

 _ **Latin: A  
Geology: A  
Oceanology: B  
Meteorology: A  
Business Maths: A]**_

"Wow, apart from Chemistry and Poetry, you really are an all-rounder." Mr Zaly commented, pushing Ms Religion off his shoulder. "Why are you so bad at Chemistry anyways?"

"I can't differentiate which chemical is which." Pauline sighed, disliking her only black mark in her otherwise spotless academic record. "And I'm not good with Poetry either, the haikus are shit."

"Okay, next one." Ram announced, placing another piece of paper underneath the visualiser.

 _ **[Martha's subject list**_

 _ **English**_

 ** _American literature: B  
English III: B  
Research skills: B  
Creative writing: B_**

 ** _Science_**

 _ **Biology: B  
Physical Science: B  
Chemistry: B**_

 _ **Maths**_

 _ **Calculus: B  
Algebra II: B  
Statistics: B  
Algebra I: B  
**_

 _ **Social**_ _ **Studies**_

 _ **American history: A  
Government: B  
Economics: A**_

 _ **PE**_

 _ **Yoga: B**_

 _ **Health**_

 _ **Nutrition: A**_

 _ **Electives**_

 _ **French: B  
Culinary arts: A  
Financial management: B  
Sociology: B  
Anthropology: B]**_

"... Martha's pretty badass. Like, she's Veronica but more Bs instead of As..." Ms Religion noted, hurling an empty can at Martha but thankfully missing her. "Good job kiddo!"

"God help me with this drunkard here." Mr Zaly groaned, apologising to Martha afterwards. "Sorry about her behaviour, she's a lightweight."

"You're telling me." Heather (McNamara) shrugged, picking up the can Ms Religion had thrown. "Jesus, these are at least 500 millilitres! Are you sure she's a lightweight?!"

"She goes crazy out after one shot, what do you think?"

"... Right..." Ram took the next piece of paper, which belonged to himself.

 _ **[Ram's subject list**_

 _ **English**_

 ** _American literature: C  
English II: B  
Research skills: C  
Creative writing: B_**

 ** _Science_**

 _ **Biology: C  
Physical science: B  
Geology: C**_

 _ **Maths**_

 _ **Algebra I**_ _ **: B  
Algebra II: C  
Maths: D  
Consumer maths: C  
**_

 _ **Social**_ _ **Studies**_

 _ **American history: F  
Government: C  
World history: B**_

 _ **PE**_

 _ **Track and field: A**_

 _ **Health**_

 _ **Nutrition: B**_

 _ **Electives**_

 _ **Spanish: B  
World geography: C  
Financial management: B  
Gardening: C  
Metal work: A]**_

"Forget about World History Ram, you should probably get help for Maths and your American History!" Veronica exclaimed, horrified to see a F for American History. "Don't come looking for me though, I don't take American History."

"I know, was hoping to get JD for that." Ram sighed, aware that his grades in Social Studies weren't exactly the best. "Okay, next one."

 _ **[Kurt's list**_

 _ **English**_

 ** _World lit: F  
English III: F  
Research skills: A  
Creative writing: C_**

 ** _Science_**

 _ **Bio: F  
Physical science: C  
Marine bio: B**_

 _ **Maths**_

 _ **Algebra I**_ _ **: D  
Algebra II: D  
Maths: F  
Consumer maths: B  
**_

 _ **Social**_ _ **Studies**_

 _ **American history: C  
Government: C  
World history: C**_

 _ **PE**_

 _ **Track and field: A**_

 _ **Health**_

 _ **Personal health: A**_

 _ **Electives**_

 _ **Spanish: B  
World geography: B  
Financial management: C  
Home management: C  
Metal work: A]**_

"How is it remotely possible to fail your Maths but pass Financial Management?" Heather (Duke) asked, in disbelief that Kurt could fail Maths yet pass Consumer Maths and Financial Management. "And... World Literature? Why did you take _that_?!"

"Um, well. All my other siblings in college told me that it would be easy... so I thought it's easy English credit. Apparently it isn't." Kurt replied, averting his eyes away from his friends and teachers. "You know, I think Mr Allen is referring to me, Ram and Mac... like, we seem to be the only ones failing."

"Well Kurt, I can help you out in World Literature. I took that in high school and while it has been exactly a decade, I think the syllabus should be still the same." Ms Religion replied, no longer drunk. It surprised the students greatly, it hasn't been more than an hour since she consumed so much alcohol and she was already sober.

"Thanks Ms Religion." Kurt said, still upset that he was one of the three who failed among the nine students. Heather (Chandler) bit her lip, she wanted to say something to Kurt but decided against it, choosing to let her lip bleed from the pressure applied.

"Okay dudes, now the lists we've all been waiting for! Guess the Heather!" Ram asked, waving one of the three remaining lists. He then placed the list underneath the visualiser, revealing which of the Heathers' list was the one underneath.

 _ **[Heather M.'s subject list**_

 _ **English**_

 _ **Creative Writing: A  
**_ _ **Journalism: A  
**_ _ **English IV: A  
**_ _ **British Literature: F (for now)**_

 _ **Science**_

 _ **Biology: F  
Physics: F  
Chemistry: F**_

 _ **Maths**_

 _ **Calculus: F  
Algebra I: F  
Algebra II: F  
Statistics: F**_

 _ **Social Studies**_

 _ **American History: F  
Global Issues: D  
Government: F**_

 _ **Physical Education**_

 _ **Physical Fitness: D**_

 _ **Health**_

 _ **Personal Health: D**_

 _ **Electives**_

 _ **German: A  
German Literature: A  
German History: A  
Economics: C  
Psychology: B]**_

"That... wasn't as bad as I expected, at least for the second half." Veronica commented, expecting Heather (McNamara) to have more Fs on her list. "Hold up, why didn't you say anything about your American History grades?! You got a fucking F for your own country's history!"

"She was banned from entering American History classes." JD responded, with Martha, Ram, and Kurt nodding in agreement. "She didn't even take any of the exams for that subject."

"We really need to raise this to the principal, even though you're a troublemaker that doesn't mean you should be banned from attending lessons." Mr Zaly said, noting it down in a notepad he brought. "Are there any other subjects that you're banned from?"

"Bio, Chemistry, all my Maths classes apart from Calculus, and Government." Heather (McNamara) answered, with Mr Zaly scribbling the subjects on the notepad. "Do I need to explain why I'm banned first?"

"Uh, sure?" Mr Zaly said, realising something about her grades. "Wait, that means you're not as stupid as we thought!"

"She is when it comes to Physics." Heather (Duke) commented, holding up one of Heather (McNamara)'s Physics pop quizzes.

"And Calculus." Veronica agreed. Heather (McNamara) wanted to yell at them, but decided to just explain why was she banned from most of her classes.

"Okay so I'm banned from Bio as Ms Shears's super afraid of me using the scalpel to hurt people as she was abused before? I can understand that, so I'm okay with failing Bio. I'm banned from Chemistry as I caused an explosion once. Mr Oliver banned me from all his Maths classes as he hated troublemakers, and I'm not sure why am I banned from my Government classes. Oh and I'm banned from American History as I kept on criticising how stupid our founding leaders were." Heather (McNamara) explained, listing off the reasons while Mr Zaly furiously jotted down the reasons onto the notepad.

"Got it, I'll talk to the principal on Monday. My god, we really need to hold a tolerance class for the whole staff..." Mr Zaly sighed, with Ms Religion scoffing in response. "What's wrong with that Eve?"

"Teachers are all fucked up, no point trying to change them. What we should do is to eliminate all those people who make the whole a terrible place to live in." Ms Religion commented, scaring the students. They wanted to comment that she sounded like JD from the musical, but decided against it as it could very well be a misunderstanding. Ram slid the second last piece of paper underneath the visualiser, projecting the next Heather's grades for all to see.

 _ **[Heather D.'s subject list**_

 _ **English**_

 _ **Creative Writing: B  
**_ _ **Journalism: A  
**_ _ **English IV: A  
**_ _ **American Literature: B**_

 _ **Science**_

 _ **Biology: B  
Physics: C  
Astrology: B  
**_

 _ **Maths**_

 _ **Trigonometry: A  
Algebra I: A  
Algebra II: A  
Accounting: B**_

 _ **Social Studies**_

 _ **World History: A  
Asian History: A  
Government: C**_

 _ **Physical Education**_

 _ **Team Sports (Volleyball): A**_

 _ **Health**_

 _ **Health: B**_

 _ **Electives**_

 _ **Korean: A  
Photography: A  
Genealogy: B  
Drawing: B  
British Literature: A]**_

"Hold the phone, you're exempted from American History _too_?!" JD asked, shocked to see that Heather (Duke) was also exempted from taking American History as a compulsory subject.

"I'm from the UK, I don't have to study US History. The principal told me that when I asked if I could be exempted." Heather (Duke) replied, as though it was obvious. "I have to study Government mind you, because I'm now living in the States. I had plans to go back to the UK, but with the Brexit and all, I'm considering staying here permanently. But really, I hate that subject. I don't give a fucking damn about politics."

"Oh right, you have dual citizenship. Lucky, you get to learn about the politics of two different countries." Heather (McNamara) commented, playfully punching Heather (Duke)'s left shoulder. Heather (Duke) scowled, she really hated the study of politics. "Why haven't I seen you in British Lit though?"

"You and Veronica have Mrs Lyrian for your class, I have Mr Tobias. Different timings basically."

"I'm still impressed that Westerburg can conduct so many different classes at once." Pauline stated, motioning for Ram to show the last list.

 _ **[Heather C.'s subject list**_

 _ **English**_

 _ **Creative Writing: B  
**_ _ **Speech: F  
**_ _ **English IV: A  
**_ _ **American Literature: B**_

 _ **Science**_

 _ **Biology: A  
Botany: B  
Physical Sciences: B  
**_

 _ **Maths**_

 _ **Statistics: A  
Algebra I: A  
Algebra II: A  
Pre-Calculus: B**_

 _ **Social Studies**_

 _ **Greek and Roman History: A  
Global Issues: F  
Government: A**_

 _ **Physical Education**_

 _ **Outdoor Survival Skills: F**_

 _ **Health**_

 _ **First-Aid: A**_

 _ **Electives**_

 _ **Programming: A  
Digital Arts: A  
Social Skills: F  
French: F  
Theatre Arts: F]**_

"... Why do I get the feeling that most of your Fs is because of Mr Chandler...?" Veronica asked, glancing through the list. "Wait, you're in Theatre Arts too? I've never seen you before..."

"O-Oh I was banned from going after my father found out about the subjects I chose to take. He banned me from attending Global Issues, Outdoor Survival Skills, French and Theatre Arts classes." Heather (Chandler) explained, a sad smile on her face. "He also banned me from taking American History, he told me that he had already explained to the principal why I'm not allowed to take that subject."

"Okay, that leaves Speech and Social Skills." JD chuckled, unable to constrain his laughter for long. "S-So, enlighten us why did you fail those two subjects?"

"Knock it off Dean." Pauline smacked JD on the head, glaring at him afterwards. "If you haven't forgotten, _you're_ taking Social Skills as a subject."

"Oh come on! Most of the students are basically talk like corpses but you don't see them fail!"

"W-Well, Mdm Teresa can't hear me, so I failed Speech... and my Social Skills class... Ms Wellins said that due to my upbringing, it was hard for the rest to interact with me without the help of Duke and McNamara."

"I'll make her interact with my _fist_." Heather (McNamara) seethed, punching a wall in rage. "Then I'll make her interact with her blood!"

"... I'm starting to think that Oliver was on to something when he banned Mac from his classes." Mr Zaly remarked quietly to Ms Religion, who smirked in agreement.

XXXXXX

"Okay, now that we know which subjects we need help with, we can start allocating who needs the help most." Ms Religion said, looking through the nine lists. "I'll tutor Kurt in World Literature since I'm the only one who has some knowledge on the subject. Mr Zaly will tutor Physics to the Heathers. In the meantime, JD will tutor Heather how to socialise, Martha will tutor Ram in American History. That leaves Pauline and Veronica, so I guess that'll be poetry. It'll last for one and a half hours, so use this time wisely."

"Uh, I don't do poetry. Am I even qualified to teach Pauline?" Veronica asked, with Pauline shoving notes related to that subject to her. "I'll take it as a yes then."

"Okay, so first you say 'hi' to a person. Then you talk about what happened to you previously. When that person initiates a topic on his own, you should nod along to show that you're paying attention and when asked for your opinion, just say it." JD instructed, writing down whatever he said on a piece of paper and showing it to Heather (Chandler), who was confused but didn't show it. "... Do you get it?"

"I guess? D-Do I have to try it out?"

"Yes, maybe you should try it on one of the teachers. Try Ms Religion first." JD suggested, directing Heather (Chandler) to Ms Religion. She held tightly to the paper JD had written on, as though it was her lifeline. As she approached Ms Religion, she started to worry if the teacher would find her an annoyance, causing her to freeze up. "Chandler, are you alright?!"

"Y-Yeah... J-Just talking to her should be fine..." Heather (Chandler) took a steadying breath and approached the table where Ms Religion and Kurt were. "Hi."

"Uh... hi?" Both Ms Religion and Kurt responded, not sure what did Heather (Chandler) want from them. Heather (Chandler) paled, referring to the paper she held on so tightly for guidance.

"U-Um... something that happened previously... um... Jason, what is the duration for a previous subject?"

"Anything!"

"O-Okay uh... My father beats my mother often until recently...?" JD wanted to slap his forehead, regretting to not teach Heather (Chandler) what topics were considered inappropriate to start a conversation. "And uh... I think he rapes her?"

"Abort! Abort mission!" JD yelled, hurriedly dragging Heather (Chandler) away from the table. "Okay, my fault! I should have told you what topics are fucking off-limits to start a conversation!"

"There are topics that I can't say to start the conversation?"

"Yes! You can't start off with heavy stuff like what you've just said." JD said, adding more words on to the paper. "No heavy stuff such as divorce, rape, and all that jazz. Got that?"

"Okay, so no divorce, no rape and no jazz music."

"N-No, you can talk about jazz. I mean topics that are on the same level as divorce and rape." Heather (Chandler) nodded, going up to the table again. "Please don't fuck this up."

"Hi. Um, Jason told me not to talk about divorce and rape." Heather (Chandler) started, with Ms Religion and Kurt nodding along. "Um... something that happened to me previously was that I fantasised having sexual intercourse with McNamara."

"Abort! Abort the fucking mission!" JD screamed, dragging Heather (Chandler) away from the table once again. "I just told you to not talk about heavy stuff!"

"You just said don't start the conversation with divorce or rape?"

"Rape is sex! Your fantasy is also about sex! You'll make them awkward!"

"I thought having sexual intercourse is a natural thing?"

"Oh come on, are we having that sex for cash conversation again?!"

"W-What?! N-No, I just said that I fantasised-"

"Same difference!"

"Mr Zaly? What do they mean by sex for cash?" Ms Religion asked, going up to Mr Zaly upon hearing that part of the conversation.

"Oh, Allen told them to tell Veronica that they had sex if they wanted 50 bucks. They did, but Veronica was super pissed at them." Mr Zaly explained, shaking his head. "Allen is really eccentric when it comes to theatre..."

"So... it's not about prostitution?" Ms Religion asked, which Mr Zaly nodded. "Okay, because Heather Chandler talked to me and Kurt by starting off with sex and it's kinda disturbing."

"Jesus Mac, you fell hard for a girl that starts conversations with sex." Heather (Duke) teased, earning herself a jab from Heather (McNamara). "Ow!"

"Shut up Heather."

"Sorry Heather."

"You two, stop picking out lines from the musical and do your work." Mr Zaly instructed, wondering what had he gotten himself into.

XXXXXX

"Okay, now that the first session is over... Veronica will tutor Heather in French, Theatre Arts and survival skills, JD will tutor Kurt and Heather in American History, Martha will tutor Pauline in Chemistry, and I guess Heather and Ram can revise all your Maths subjects with each other. This will last for three hours this time, so allocate the time given." Ms Religion said, pinching her nasal bridge. She didn't expect teaching World Literature to be so tiring and from the looks of it, Kurt probably still didn't understand a thing she had just explained.

"What about you two?" Martha asked, noticing that the two teachers had no one to teach.

"I'm going online to bitch about some teachers, not too sure about Eve here." Mr Zaly said, pulling out his phone. "Oh, Allen's online."

 _Allen: [heard ur tutoring the main cast today, how r they?]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Let's just say that Mac's physics suck balls.]_

 _Allen: [lol]_

 _Allen: [her calc is pretty bad too]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Who is her teacher for that subject again?]_

 _NotATerrorist: [I know it's not Oliver.]_

 _Allen: [i think its larry]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Lawrence? I thought he teaches marine bio...]_

 _Evengelist: [Just like how I'm teaching World History but end up taking some English classes?!]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Isn't that because Sophia is on maternity leave?]_

 _Evengelist: [Who the fuck has maternity leave for 6 years?!]_

 _Suzie: [Agreed.]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Wow, Suzie's online? That's a first.]_

 _Suzie: [Well I'm free, so yeah.]_

 _Suzie: [Managed to drug my husband so he's out for at least 5 hours.]_

 _NotATerrorist: [...]_

 _Allen: [rt]_

 _Evengelist: [Sorry Suzie, but I have to agree with them.]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Anyways listen to this, Mac's banned from most of her classes!]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Like, that's a thing in US?]_

 _Allen: [no, which teachers banned her anyways?]_

 _NotATerrorist: [She's banned from bio, chem, US history, government! Seriously, the only reason she gets so many Fs is because she can't even enter the room!]_

 _Evengelist: [Don't forget Oliver, since she can't take any Maths subject apart from Calculus.]_

 _Allen: [basically we have shears, qing, ollie, derry and woody]_

 _Allen: [why is she even banned by them anyways?]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Bio because of Shears's trauma, you know how her marriage played out.]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Chem because she caused an explosion, who teaches her anyways I don't know.]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Maths because Oliver's super intolerant of chaos.]_

 _NotATerrorist: [US history because she talks shit about the leaders, and we don't know about the Government.]_

 _Evengelist: [By the way Allen, can you please delete that damn video already?!]_

 _Allen: [no way, ur dancing to you belong with me is so funny]_

 _Suzie: [She started kissing people during her routine though...]_

 _Allen: [n thts how ur affair with her started!]_

 _Suzie: [Fuck you Allen.]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Come on guys, this is a serious matter! I can somewhat understand Shears and her Chem teacher, but the rest is more than just fucked up man.]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Who teaches her Chem anyways?]_

 _Allen: [qing]_

 _NotATerrorist: [That Chinese bitch?! Fuck her!]_

 _Chandler: [Mr Allen, can you help us with Theatre Arts? Veronica has a hard time explaining some things to me.]_

 _Allen: [wtf how did u get in here?!]_

 _Chandler: [Hacking. Oh by the way Ms Religion, we retrieved the video of you dancing and deleted it in Mr Allen's phone.]_

 _Allen: [wtfffff]_

 _Allen: [this is illegal!]_

 _Chandler: [Yeah well, I have blackmail of you kissing a dog.]_

 _Chandler: [According to the internet, it's an Alaskan Malamute. I think it's called Snowy?]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Oh come on, I told you to stop kissing my dog!]_

 _Suzie: [Should we be disturbed that Allen kisses your dog, or that it's not the first time he's doing it?]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Doesn't matter! Allen, stop kissing my dog! She's a girl and she's gay!]_

 _Allen: [wait dogs can be gay too?]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Well she expresses interest in female dogs...?]_

 _Evengelist: [Heather, do you still have the video?]_

 _Chandler: [Yup! One problem though.]_

 _Suzie: [If the video is corrupted, that's fine with her really.]_

 _Chandler: [No, Jason accidentally pressed on the share on social media button, so everyone can see it.]_

 _Chandler: [On the bright side, I managed to edit out the faces! And this means Mr Allen can't blackmail you anymore!]_

 _Evengelist: [Heather, that's nice of you. But you're still too naive.]_

 _Suzie: [Okay, let's hope that my husband can recognise me in that video. I really want a divorce.]_

 _Chandler: [I recommend Mrs Sawyer! She's helping my mother out with the divorce proceedings!]_

 _Chandler: [Oh, do you want me to un-edit your face Mrs Suzie?]_

 _Suzie: [Sure, why the fuck not.]_

 _Allen: [GET THE FK OUT OF THIS GRP CHANDLER!]_

 ** _Allen removed Chandler from the group._**

 _NotATerrorist: [You know, she can just hack her way back in...]_

 _Allen: [fk her i just lost two of my blkmail]_

 _Suzie: [... How many people do you have blackmail on...?]_

 _Allen: [almost the whole sch]_

 _Evengelist: [All in favour of getting Heather to remove any of Allen's online blackmail?]_

 _NotATerrorist: [Rt]_

 _Suzie: [Retweet]_

 _Allen: [no fair guys!]_

"Hey Ms Religion, sorry for uploading that video on the net." JD apologised from his seat, with the laptop in front of him playing a video of a half-naked woman dancing drunkenly. "But hey, your moves are _on_ fire!"

"Stop watching that JD!" Ms Religion cried out, rushing to pause the video on the laptop.

XXXXXX

"Are you four now confident of passing everything?" Mr Zaly asked, exiting the messaging app. The four students in question looked at each other, unsure if they could actually pass everything. "Don't worry guys, it should be fine."

"Uh huh, easy for them. I didn't attend the classes for the ones I failed in!" Heather (McNamara) spat, clutching on her Physics notes tightly. "... And Chandler told me that you said that I sucked at your subject."

"I think I really need to have a talk with Ms Wellins, Chandler could really use some help in Social Skills..." Mr Zaly sighed, turning to face Heather (Chandler). "Young lady, always remember to consider your conversational partner's feelings before saying anything."

"Okay. Am I suppose to apologise to McNamara for telling her what you said, or am I supposed to get you to apologise to her?" Heather (Chandler) asked, which made everyone sigh at her question. "... Was it a bad question?"

"How is it possible that you can converse so well among us, but fail badly at the subject itself?" Heather (Duke) asked, curious to know the reason behind the mystery. Heather (Chandler) shrugged, as expected.

"Anyways, I'll try to get the principal to exempt you from the subjects you were banned from attending for the upcoming exam." Mr Zaly informed the two Heathers involved, heading for the door. "I'll see some of you on Monday then. Good luck."

"Same here. Remember, practice is now on Tuesdays and Thursdays." Ms Religion smiled, giving them a thumbs-up. "See you guys soon!"

"Bye!" The nine of them sent their teachers off, the door closing on them. It was already four in the afternoon, and some of them were packing up.

"You guys going home already?" Ram asked, referring to Pauline and Martha.

"Yeah, mom asked me to come back earlier." Martha replied, pushing up her glasses.

"Same here." Pauline said, exiting the house before Martha. "Anything important, text me."

"Yeah! See you guys on Monday!" Martha beamed, following Pauline out of Ram's house. The group was now down to seven, with Heather (McNamara) stuffing her study materials into her yellow bag.

"I'm heading home too. Dad told me to stop staying out till midnight so I gotta motor." Heather (McNamara) explained before any of the six could ask. "Duke, there's something I wanna ask you via text. Keep your phone souped up at all times."

"Sure sure." Heather (Duke) waved her best friend off, going back to studying her notes for Government. There were still the six of them, with Kurt staying over at Ram's once again, JD staying until dinner time, Heather (Chandler) staying back to teach JD sign language, Veronica was planning to leave soon and Heather (Duke) wanted to wait until Heather (Chandler) was done. With a sigh, she picked up her game console from her bag but an incoming message on her phone grabbed her attention instead. "Wow, that's fast."

 _McNamara_ _: [we need to talk]_

 _Duke: [sure...?]_

 _Duke: [what is it anyways?]_

 _McNamara: [rmb u said tht veroinica wont love the real u? last sunday?]_

 _Duke: [uh yeah why?]_

 _McNamara: [r u trans?]_

 _Duke: [what]_

 _McNamara: [like, shes gay, so if ur a guy on the inside, she wont like u right?]_

 _Duke: [how the hell did u come to tht concluson?!]_

 _McNamara: [well for startss u said 'real me']_

 _McNamara: [n theres a ton of trans you stories online]_

 _Duke: [oh for christ sake, im not trans]_

 _Duke: [when i said 'real me' i dun mean it tht way]_

 _Duke: [god u write too much fanfic]_

 _McNamara: [duke, u can trust me]_

 _Duke: [for the last time, not trans here]_

 _McNamara: [not tht]_

 _McNamara: [i mean, if u got problems, u can always tell me]_

 _McNamara: [ur my bestest friend n im always here for u]_

 _Duke: [thks for telling me]_

"Are you texting Mac?" Veronica asked, peering at the conversation over the green girl's shoulder. Heather (Duke) yelped in surprise, turning around to face Veronica. "Oh sorry, did I scare you?"

"N-No, just surprised." Heather (Duke) laughed, brushing her hair behind her ears. "It reminds me of the party we had here, you were watching me play Psycho-Pass and you told me that you didn't know I like to play anime games."

"Heh, yeah. Thank god you did though, if not I wouldn't get to talk with you so often."

"Aw are you flirting with me? You're a real baby gay, you know that?"

"Can't be one if I'm not in any closet yeah?"

"You sure your house doesn't have a closet?"

"Oh I do, but I don't sleep in 'em."

"Who knows, you may be sleepwalking into the closet every night, and walking out of it afterwards!"

"I don't do that Veronica!"

"How would you know?"

"How would _you_ know?"

"Invite me to sleep over at your place and we can find out!"

"Is that a roundabout way of saying that you wanna sleep with me? Cause that's not working on me."

"Oh? What if I said that I want keep you awake all night long?"

"Then you'll never find out if I sleep in the fucking closet!"

"True that!"

"Hey Jason... are you positive that Veronica and Duke aren't dating?" Heather (Chandler) asked JD, who was watching the exchange in amusement.

"I don't know, but I'm sure as hell that they're keeping _me_ entertained here!" JD chuckled, the conversation between Veronica and Heather (Duke) resembling actual flirting as the minutes passed. Ram and Kurt approached JD, with the script in hand. "Oh Rammy boy, whatcha need from me?"

"You know 'Fight For Me'? We kinda need to practice how to stay still. I don't want to fall over and get yelled by Allen-man." Ram said, pointing to said song in the script. Kurt nodded briskly, while JD sighed in reluctance. "Sorry man, but getting yelled at by Allen-man sounds rough."

"I know, got yelled at on Tuesday. We also need to learn how to fight in slow-mo then." JD got up from his seat and picked up a book. "Okay, so I need to learn how to fight with a book."

"You can ask Mac for that. She gets into fights pretty often, and she's fucking good at it." Heather (Duke) chimed in, overhearing the guys' conversation. The remaining five turned to stare at Heather (Duke), as though she had just admitted that she was a cold-blooded murderer. "What?! Have you ever seen her throwing out a right hook?! She even said that was her hobby!"

XXXXXX

 _[Dear diary,_

 _I just a had a study session with the main cast today. It was kind of wacky at times, but it was really fun hanging out with them. I'm actually grateful that Martha signed me up, if she didn't and asked me if I wanted to, I wouldn't get to know the rest! Especially the Heathers. Chandler is awesome at hacking, she got a message from Ms Religion to hack into Mr Allen's online blackmail and save it somewhere. I've a feeling that Ms Religion wants to use them as blackmail, but I think we can all agree that she's more responsible than Mr Allen. And I learnt that even the teachers have their own drama? Like Ms Shears is a bit like Chandler, failed family problems and all that shit. Mr Zaly hates Ms Qing for some reason, but everyone in school hates her. And I got to talk to Duke more, she's really funny. I think she's also into girls, but either she's not aware of it, or she's doing a good job at hiding it without making her gay whenever we flirt with each other. We also found out the Mac's not super dumb, she's just banned from most of her classes. Seriously though, her Calculus needs work. Her differentiation broke every single rule in Calculus. I should talk to her more though, it seems like she could use a friend. Or actually, all three Heathers probably need more friends. I'm glad JD is friendly with Chandler though, who knew that they were in Social Skills class? I think I should review my study materials tomorrow, and Monday will be memorising the script. Hope I don't fuck up on Tuesday..._

 _-Veronica]_

XXXXXX

Slushie Addict here, signalling the end of the study arc! Yay! But seriously, the next chapter is going back to practice sessions. And in case you're asking, their exams aren't literally next week, but it's coming soon. I still can't believe I actually went online to search the criteria students in Ohio need to take, thanks to that I found out that it's compulsory to take Biology, Physical Science and Algebra II? I have a lot of things I really want to say about not all students in USA taking Calculus, but I figure it's probably like that to accommodate the numerous subjects they offer in school. Anyways, please don't bash me up if I listed subject combinations that are not possible here, the education system in USA is already complicated enough for me to understand, the subjects offered in each level are worse.


	7. Chapter 7

Hey Slushie Addict here! We're back to practice sessions, and hopefully they'll get through this practice session alive! Okay, I have nothing to say for real this chapter, so as always I don't own Heathers!

XXXXXX

"H-How was your practice session with Kurt and Ram?" Heather (Chandler) asked JD, walking out of a room together. Social Skills class ended, and they were making their way to the auditorium. They were supposed to already be at the auditorium at that time, but their Social Skills teacher Ms Wellins added an extra class to prepare them for their upcoming exams. JD sighed in frustration, recounting the session to Heather.

"Terrible. We just can't get the steps down. And when we do, we flub our lines." JD said, stopping in his tracks. "Oh shit, Rammy boy's texting me."

"W-What did he say?"

"He's asking me where the fuck are we now. Should I tell him that we're making out somewhere and make Mac crazy jealous or what?" Heather gave him a confused look, tilting her head slightly.

"Why would McNamara get jealous? Oh wait... do you like her?" JD groaned, was she always this oblivious? It was obvious to those who had functioning eyes, and Heather clearly had functioning vision. "Am I wrong?"

"Urgh, you wait a moment. I'm texting Rammy boy first." JD's fingers flew over the keyboard, instantly sending back a reply.

 _SweeneyTodd: [dude chillax]_

 _SweeneyTodd: [n srsly, why did u tell me tht ur making out with chandler?!]_

 _JD: [dunno]_

 _JD: [impluse]_

 _JD: [send tht to mac for me tho]_

 _SweeneyTodd: [i do tht n she will KILL me]_

 _JD: [nah at most just crucify u]_

 _SweeneyTodd: [same diff!]_

 _SweeneyTodd: [but srsly get ur asses here asap]_

"Okay, we gotta motor. Mr Allen's probably yelling at them." JD grabbed Heather's hand and ran towards the auditorium, barging in panting. "Gah... Chandler, remind me to never run again."

"Okay, never run again."

"I mean when I'm about to break into a run!" Mr Allen clapped his hands, all eyes on him. The rest of the main cast scooted away from Heather (McNamara), who had an angry scowl on her features. "... Well shit. If I die, I want you to say how awesome I am at life and that I'm so glad that I'm the one who helped Ronnie to discover her sexuality."

"You can plan your funeral later!" Mr Allen barked, pointing at the stage. "You on stage, _now_!"

"Okay okay." JD sighed, pulling out a black trench coat and a book from his bag. He donned it and made his way upstage with Ram and Kurt, both with fearful looks on their faces. "I thought you said that Mac will only crucify you if you told her that I made out with Chandler?"

"I did, and in my defence, I didn't know that she was behind me." Ram explained, getting into position. Everyone soon made their way up the stage, though it was at a languid pace as compared to the three men.

"Haul your fucking asses and get in position! Start from the part where Kurt calls you a 'sweetheart'!" Mr Allen roared, for some reason more stern with his orders than usual. Kurt nodded, going to the side with Ram while JD stood in the middle waiting for them to start, opening the book he took out from the bag. "And... ACTION!"

 _"Hey! Sweetheart!"_ Kurt sauntered up to JD and placed an arm on JD's shoulder. _"What did your boyfriend say when you told him that you're moving to Sherwood, Ohio?"_

 _"My buddy Kurt just asked you a question."_ Ram sneered, smacking JD's head with the back of his hand. JD said nothing, scowling in response.

 _"Hey man, doesn't the cafeteria have a 'no fags allowed' rule?"_ Kurt asked, breaking out in laughter alongside with Ram. At this moment, JD snapped the book shut and raised his head, a smirk plastered on his face.

 _"Seems like they have an open door policy for assholes though."_ JD commented, which the three of them chuckled for a few seconds, then the two jocks glared at him.

 _"Hold his arms."_ The music started, which was the cue for the trio to start fighting. By some luck, the punch Kurt threw out was successfully blocked by JD's book, something that they didn't manage to nail it down during their practice session on Saturday. Everyone was now in horror, except for Veronica who was supposed to look love-struck.

 _Holy shit! (_ _Holy shit!)_

 _Holy shit! (_ _Holy shit!)_

 _Holy shit! (_ _Holy shit!)_

 _Holy shit! (_ _Holy shit!)_

 _Holy shit!_

 _Why, when do you see boys fight does it look so terrible... yet feels so right...?_

 _I shouldn't watch this crap, that's not who I am but with this kid... Daaaamn._

 _Hey, Mr No-Name-Kid, so who might you be?_

 _And could you fight for me?_

 _And hey, could you face the crowd?_

 _Could you be seen with me, and still act proud?_

Veronica was supposed to go underneath JD's arm, which was supposed to be paused in mid-fight with Ram. As she went under, she felt JD's arm starting to tremble as she brushed past his sleeve. Veronica apologised to him in her head as she got up, walking towards him.

 _And hey, could you hold my hand?_

 _And could you carry me to No-Man's Laaaaa- fucking shit!_

The reason why Veronica swore mid-song was because as she held JD's free hand and leant on his arm like what she was supposed to do, JD started to fall backwards, which brought Veronica down with him. She didn't expect that to happen, so she was unable to react in time by releasing her hand.

"Oh my god, I got you guys!" Kurt quickly made a dash towards the falling duo, sliding on the floor and using his back to break their fall. He didn't expect the combined weight of 101 kilos to be more than he can handle, but at least his back wasn't injured. "Oh my fucking god, get off me. You two are heavy together."

"CUT! JD, what the fuck was that about?!" Mr Allen yelled, without the aid of a microphone. The other teacher beside him, a relatively short woman of Asian descent groaned, stomping on his foot. "OW?! Qing! Get your fucking foot off mine!"

"How about you stop shouting at people?!" The woman yelled back, flipping the bird at him. The performers blinked, with Ram still doing a half-squat to mimic being punched back. He whimpered in pain, before collapsing to the floor with a soft thud.

"I can shout at people however I want!"

"No you can't!"

"YES I CAN YOU FUCKING ORIENTAL BITCH!"

"OH DON'T YOU _DARE_ RAISE YOUR VOICE AT ME YOU WHITE DEVIL TRASH!"

"THE FUCK DID YOU CALL ME YOU YELLOW FUCKTOY!"

"OH THAT IS _IT_!" The woman lunged for Mr Allen, tacking him to the ground and proceeding to punch him. Mr Allen fought back and before the students knew it, it had blown up into a full fistfight where everything was off the table.

"S-Should we stop them?" Veronica asked, worried that at the rate the fight was going, they would have to call an ambulance. JD shrugged, pulling out his phone and recording the fight. "What are you doing?"

"Blackmail. If we record this, we can have some hold over Mr Allen whenever he blows his gasket. I mean, surely the principal doesn't tolerate fighting among teachers." JD replied, grinning wickedly. Veronica sighed, going towards Martha to chat while the two jocks went backstage for some reason.

XXXXXX

"Okay so while Ms Qing and Mr Allen are in a time-out, I'll be taking over the session." Ms Religion sighed, glancing at the two mentioned teachers. She had informed them that she would be running late and what did she see? Two teachers punching the living daylights out of each other. _'They were supposed to be the responsible ones here... not the ones starting this shit.'_

"Ms Religion, why the fuck is Ms Qing even here?" Roger raised his hand, though he didn't really need to considering that he wasn't in class.

"Well... I made a deal with her, help us out once and I won't ask Heather to post Mr Allen's blackmail of her online." Ms Religion responded, with shocked looks on everyone's faces apart from the main cast. "... Uh, let's just say that the blackmail thumb drive is with Heather right now."

"Hey Chandler, what _is_ Ms Qing's blackmail material?" Veronica whispered to Heather (Chandler), interested to know the dirt the latter had gathered.

"She's using the lab equipment to cook her food. Which... is kind of bad and unhygienic?" Heather whispered back, not wanting the others to hear her. Ms Religion clapped her hands together, getting the students' attention.

"Okay guys, we're doing 'Freeze Your Brain' now. Veronica, please don't actually drink the slush when JD asks you if you want one. And JD, bear with the pain. Don't chatter your teeth even though it hurts okay?" Ms Religion said, motioning the cast to go up on stage. "Backstage crew, bring out the slushie machine please!"

"What happened? When did you practice the song?" Veronica asked JD, for she wasn't present when they had had their first practice run. JD thought for a moment, deciding that a shrug was the most appropriate response to Veronica's question. "Seriously?"

"Veronica, start off by asking whether a 7-11 is a good place to date. Or something like that, I don't know really." Ms Religion called out, a reassuring smile on her face unlike Mr Allen's usual stern frown. "Action!"

 _"At a 7-11? Swanky first date."_ Veronica grinned, teasing JD. JD shrugged, casually picking up a cup as he narrows the distance between them.

 _"Hey, I love this place."_

 _"No offence, but why?"_ JD took a steadying breath as he entered into a song that told Veronica the virtues of a 7-11.

 _I've been to ten high schools, they start to get blurry._

 _No point planting roots, cause you're gone in a hurry._

 _My dad keeps two suitcases packed in the den, so it's only a matter of when..._

 _I don't learn the names, don't bother with faces._

 _All I can trust is this concrete oasis._

 _Seems every time I'm about to despair, there's a 7-11 right there!_

 _Each store is the same, from Las Vegas to Boston!_

 _Linoleum aisles I love to get lost in!_

 _I pray at my altar of slush... yeah I live for that sweet frozen rush...!_

 _Freeze your brain... Suck on that straw, get lost in the pain!_

 _Happiness comes, when everything numbs, who needs cocaine?!_

 _Just freeze your brain..._

 _"Care for a hit?"_ JD asked, offering his cup to Veronica. Veronica smirked, shaking her head. JD shrugged, pretending to take another sip from the cup as his teeth really hurt after the first sip.

 _"Does your mommy know you drink all this crap?"_ JD shook his head sadly, which elicited a soft 'oh shit' from Veronica.

 _When mom was alive, we lived halfway normal._

 _Now it's me and my dad, we're less formal._

 _I learnt to cook pasta, I learnt to pay rent, learnt that the world doesn't owe you a cent..._

 _You're planning future, Veronica Sawyer!_

 _You'll go to some college, and marry a lawyer!_

 _But the sky's gonna hurt when falls... so you better start building some walls!_

 _Freeze your brain! Swim in the ice, get lost in the pain!_

 _Shut your eyes tight, vanish from sight! Let nothing remain!_

 _Freeze your brain! Shatter your skull, fight pain with more pain!_

 _Forget who you are, unburden your load!_

 _Forget in six weeks, you'll be back on the road!_

 _And when the voice in your head, says you're better off dead..._

 _Don't open a veiiiiiin!_

 _Just... freeze your brain..._

 _Freeze your brain... go on and freeze your brain..._

 _Try it._

"And cut! JD, that's a great run! I think we don't have to worry about this scene!" Ms Religion clapped her hands, a bright smile on her face. JD pumped his hand in the air, while Veronica did a victory dance on stage. "Okay, 30 minutes break! Then we'll start 'Candy Store'."

"Isn't the next song 'Big Fun'?" Veronica asked, surprised to hear that they would be going back to practice 'Candy Store'.

"Well yes, but from what I heard from Mr Allen, the three of you need practice standing still." Ms Religion explained, pointing to the three men. "Oh and Veronica, Pauline will be taking over your role in 'Candy Store', so you'll be working on your movement in 'Fight For Me'."

"Sure thing." Veronica nodded, she still felt guilty that she caused JD to topple backwards. At least the rest were away from them, so they didn't come crashing down like dominoes. She went over to Heather (McNamara), who was looking under her skirt. "... What are you doing?"

"Checking to see if my undies would rip like last time." Heather responded, examining her underwear in scrutiny. Veronica cocked her head, realising a second later what did she mean by it.

"You mean that the ripping sound last practice was the sound of your underwear splitting?!" Veronica asked, stifling her giggles. Heather glared at her, wanting to punch her in the face. "S-Sorry! It's just so funny you know?"

"Shut up. Anyways, Mr Zaly just texted me saying that I can attend lessons proper now. Of course, I'll only be taking exams for the subjects that I weren't banned from in the first place."

"I still can't believe that you told us in the group that you failed everything but languages, you clearly passed subjects that have no relation to language!"

"Eh, it's easier for me. It also gives you guys some hope." Heather shrugged, her emerald eyes going over to Heather (Duke). "Hey Duke, can you lend me your masking tape just in case?"

" _Again_?! Mac, I seriously don't want you to scream in pain again." Heather (Duke) groaned, crossing her arms. "I know it's basically free Brazillian waxing for you but it's seriously gross."

"B-Brazillian waxing?! Mac, just what are you planning to do with the tape?!" Veronica asked, horrified by Heather (Duke)'s words. Both Heathers stared at Veronica, plastering a fake smile on their faces as they went off. _'Oh my god, I think I have an idea now.'_

XXXXXX

 _"Are we gonna have a problem?! You got a bone to pick? You've come so far, why now are you pulling on my dick?! I'd normally slap your face off, and everyone here could watch! But I'm feeling nice, here's some advice, listen up BIATCH."_ Heather (Chandler) smirked, pushing Veronica away right as the music to 'Candy Store' played. The three of them started to dance, and compared to their first attempt, their dance steps were more synchronised and sexier. It showed to everyone how much effort they had put into learning the dance, which would have impressed Mr Allen if he weren't still in a time-out.

 _I like!_

 _Lookin' hot, buying stuff they cannot!_

 _I like!_

 _Drinkin' hard, maxing dad's credit card!_

 _I like!_

 _Skipping gym, scaring her, screwin' him!_

 _Killer clothes, kickin' nerds in the nose!_

This time, there wasn't any ripping sound made when the three women kicked their legs up. Veronica heaved a sigh of relief, she really didn't want to see Heather (McNamara)'s groin. Out of the corner of her eye, Ms Religion was covering her eyes with her hands which slowly removed themselves from her face. Veronica assumed that she wasn't the only one who knew about Heather's wardrobe malfunction the last session.

 _If you lack the balls, you can go play dolls. Let your mommy fix you a SNACK!_

 _Whoa!_

 _Or you could come smoke, pound some rum and coke, in my Porsche with the quarterback!_

 _Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!_

 _Honey, whatchu waitin' for? Welcome to my candy store!_

 _Time for you to prove you're not a loser anymore! And step into my candy store..._

 _Guys fall! At your feet, pay the check, help you cheat!_

 _All you! Gotta do, say goodbye to Shamoo!_

 _That freak's! Not your friend, I can tell in the end._

 _If she! Had your shot, she would leave you to rot!_

 _'Course if you don't care, fine, go braid her hair! Maybe Sesame Street is on!_

 _Whoa!_

 _Or forget that creep, and get in my jeep!_

 _Let's go tear up someone's lawn!_

 _Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!_

 _Honey, whatchu waitin' for? Welcome to my candy store!_

 _You just gotta prove you're not a pussy anymore! And step into my candy store...!_

 _You can join the team... or you can bitch and moan!_

 _You can live the dream... or you can die alone!_

 _You can fly with eagles or if you prefer, keep on testing me and end up like HER!_

The three Heathers were now rocking their hips from side to side, their pointed fingers slowly moving closer to their hips. They each had a mocking smile on their faces, waiting for the exchange between Veronica and Martha to unfold.

 _"Veronica, look! Ram invited me to his homecoming party! This proves he's been thinking about me!"_ Martha gushed, completely love-struck after reading the forged note. Veronica paled, turning back to look at the Heathers. Heather (Chandler) cocked her head to one side, indicating that Veronica had a choice to tell Martha the truth at a cost.

 _"... Colour me stoked..."_ Veronica mumbled, averting her eyes away from Martha's out of guilt.

 _"I'm so happy!"_ Martha excitedly replied, going off the stage. Veronica wanted to stop her, but it was too late. Meanwhile, Heather (Duke) decided to steal the limelight by inserting herself into the main part of the song.

 _"Whooooa-ooo-oh! Honey, whatchu waitin' for-"_ Heather (Duke) started, but instead of Heather (Chandler) pushing her or slapping her, it was Veronica pulling her closer to meet her lips with a kiss. Heather (Duke) immediately pushed away, a surprised blush forming on her face. "V-Veronica?!"

"Oh shit! I'm so sorry, your lips looked so tempting and so I just..." Veronica fumbled an apology, with the other two Heathers cheering in the background. "Stop it you two!"

"Cut! Wait, why are you on stage? I thought it's Pauline who's supposed to be..." Ms Religion commented, turning back to the actors who was supposed to be practicing 'Fight For Me'. She couldn't find Pauline with them, and she wasn't backstage either. "Where is she?"

"Here! What did I miss?" Pauline said, entering the auditorium with a stack of papers in her hands. "Sorry, I had some urgent student council business to attend to just now. It's about the upcoming Halloween event, so yeah."

"So how does Duke's lips taste like?" Heather (McNamara) asked, a Cheshire grin sewn on her face. Veronica groaned, cradling her head in embarrassment. "I didn't know you had the balls!"

"Oh shut up... I made things awkward with her now..." Veronica mumbled, with Heather giving her a few comforting pats on her back. "Shit... she's straight right?"

"No...? She's gay, like you." Veronica looked up at Heather, who had a genuine smile on her face. "What? Just because she tells people that she doesn't know her sexuality doesn't mean that she really doesn't know right?"

"Wait wait wait, she _knows_ that she's gay?!"

"Yeah...? She's always checking you out since freshman year. You mean you didn't know?"

"Of course not! I mean, I only knew that I'm into girls last year! And how is it that she knew about me since freshman year when I only saw her last year when I was fantasising having sex with her?!" Veronica exclaimed, forgetting that Heather (Duke) was nearby. Thankfully for her, she didn't notice. Or chose to ignore her. Either which, it worked out in Veronica's favour. "... Shit."

"Don't worry, your secret is safe with me!" Heather (McNamara) laughed, playfully hitting Veronica's shoulder with her left hand. Her face then dropped to a frown, her eyes glancing around. "... Can you tell me something though?"

"A-Anything." Veronica wasn't sure why Heather's expression changed to a frown, but she figured that she would know sooner or later.

"... Did Duke send you texts indicating that she might be depressed?" Veronica shook her head, while her last online conversation with Heather (Duke) left her with a weird feeling, it probably wasn't enough to determine that she was depressed. Heather (McNamara) sighed, glancing over at the person in question before going back to Veronica. "Okay look, I think she _might_ be depressed."

"No offence, but why do you think that?"

"Well... She told me that you wouldn't love the real her on the day Chandler called you to ask about sexuality and shit. Then I asked her on Saturday whether she's trans cause like, you're gay as fuck." Heather (McNamara) said, unlocking her phone and scrolling through her messages until she reached the conversation she was referring to. "Here, take a look."

"... I'm not really sure whether she's depressed just from this conversation..." Veronica said, looking through the conversation and hand back the phone to Heather. "But I do have a theory of my own. I mean, if you wanna-"

"Spill."

"Okay so, I think she have some family issues. Like, she may not be on good term with her parents?" Veronica started, remembering the scenarios that led her to that conclusion. "On our first gathering, I was talking to her about her heritage and she told me 'genetics are fucked up sometimes'. She didn't seem really into talking about her parents, and she took five whole minutes to text me back to say that her parents are working when she texted me last week!"

"You may be getting somewhere... I mean, I've been over at her place many times at weird hours, but not once have I seen her folks." Heather nodded, beckoning Veronica to come closer. "And between you and me... I sneaked into her room once. Every single pic with her parents in it were ripped to shreds."

"No kidding? Hey Mac, I know I asked you this before, but about Duke's reluctance to bare her arms..." Veronica trailed off, with Heather (McNamara) understanding what she wanted to say.

"She does bare them in volleyball, but she wears wristbands during training and competitions... You don't think she..." Veronica gave her a resolute nod, which worried Heather greatly. "Oh my god... That... that would really be bad."

"Yeah. Which is why we really need to find out what's underneath all that fucking cloth."

"Well definitely not when she's showering... She changes out and in the bathroom."

"Fuck. What should we do? Confront her?"

"Hey Sawyer! Are you going to be helping me out with the haunted house on Halloween?" Pauline approached the duo, holding up two flyers. "It'll be a great help if you guys could, since Duke just pissed in her pants when I mentioned the word 'Halloween' to her."

"Oh right... The Halloween decos trigger her arachnophobia." Heather murmured, her eyes lighting up. "Hey Pauline, there's some kind of offering event during the Halloween carnival right?"

"Yeah, it's at the haunted house. Why?"

"How many offerings do the participants need to fork up?"

"Depends on the volunteers. Seriously, why?"

"Can the two of us help out for that section?" Heather exchanged looks with Veronica, who still wasn't following. "Veronica, don't you get it?"

"Not re- oh. Pauline, we can ask whatever offering we want right?" Veronica asked, now understanding Heather's plan.

"I mean of course it can't be something like lingerie, but yeah anything else goes." Pauline shrugged, which made the two girls excited. "I take it that you two are interested?"

"Fuck yes!" Pauline nodded, scribbling on to the back of a flyer.

"Okay, I'll add you guys into the volunteer group. You won't believe how little people we have..."

"How many do you need?" Veronica asked, with Pauline holding up five fingers. "15? That sounds reasonable..."

"Not 15, 50." Pauline sighed, exiting the auditorium. "Tell Ms Religion that I won't be coming for practice until Halloween's over."

"Duly noted." Veronica said, glancing at Heather (Duke). _'I hope this works...'_

XXXXXX

"Veronica, are you going to help out for Halloween?" Martha asked, holding a box of tarts for her family. Veronica nodded, a grin on her face. "Oh don't tell me you're helping out in the haunted house?!"

"Bingo. I've always wanted to scare people!"

"Speaking of scare, Duke mentioned that she wished she could skip school on Halloween." Martha said, gathering her best friend's attention. "Mac and Chandler convinced her otherwise though, saying that it'll be very. I'm not so sure if that's a good idea though, her arachnophobia is quite severe."

"Hopefully. Didn't Ms Religion say that that the wardrobe team is measuring our sizes on Halloween? So she kinda has to attend."

"True..." Martha trailed off, the conversation dying down. Veronica's phone buzzed with a message, which came from Pauline.

 ** _Fleming added Veronica to 'Haunted House committee'_.**

 _Fleming: [Hey Sawyer, meet the others I've roped into doing this shit]_

 _Lohstgirl: [whuuuut]_

 _Lohstgirl: [u said tht this wld be fun]_

 _Fleming: [No, I said that this is fun torture]_

 _Veronica: [You seem friendly with her Pauline?]_

 _Veronica: [... It is a girl right?]_

 _Lohstgirl: [omg duh]_

 _McNamara: [who knows u could be a pervert pretending to be a girl]_

 _Valentine: [haha u see brooke, ppl think ur a guy]_

 _McNamara: [wait, brooke lohst? the slut in junior yr?]_

 _Lohstgirl: [omg wtffff]_

 _Lohstgirl: [i just like sex]_

 _Slushieboi: [can't blame her really, u do hv a terrible rep brookie]_

 _Lohstgirl: [i told u not to call me tht!]_

 _Veronica: [Pauline, that's not JD right?]_

 _Fleming: [Nope, that's Michael Mell. Junior year]_

 _Fleming: [Basically most of the people here are juniors]_

 _Jerry's Heere: [yup]_

 _Veronica: [This isn't BMC right? SQUIP doesn't exist right?]_

 _CC: [Trust me, we had a crisis like your current one when we first met in freshman year...]_

 _Richislit: [freshman yr, i didn't hv a girlfriend or a clue]_

 _Fleming: [Stop it]_

 _Fleming: [The rest aren't online, but fuck it]_

 _Fleming: [This will be the group discussing the haunted house plans]_

 _Fleming: [So materials, location, decos, costume will all be discussed HERE]_

 _Lohstgirl: [picked out an outfit for tht day, made sure to get 1 a few sizes too tight]_

 _McNamara: [can we like leave this grp]_

 _Veronica: [Rt]_

 _Fleming: [I wish I could allow you guys to]_

 _Fleming: [But sadly no]_

 _Veronica: [Mac, prepare your lifeboat. Let's take a narly wave over to Remington.]_

 _McNamara: [kk]_

 _CC: [God I'm so sorry for freaking you guys out.]_

 _CC: [Please don't hate us.]_

"The people involved in the haunted house are crazier than us." Veronica commented to Martha, holding up her phone. "How did Pauline even get those people to help?"

"Maybe through mutual friends?" Martha suggested, offering her friend a smile. "Who are they anyways?"

"Basically the main cast of 'Be More Chill'. I'm expecting them to be in the musical with us instead of being ghosts..."

"I think they got themselves rejected or something. Anyways, exams are round the corner... I'm kinda nervous." Veronica chuckled awkwardly at Martha's confession. She felt the same way, she was studying hard so that she could enter either Harvard, Duke, or Brown University.

"Don't worry Martha, I'm sure we will make it through."

XXXXXX

 _[Dear diary,_

 _God I signed myself up for some wacky ride for Halloween. Worse still, I got myself signed up with the BMC cast. From the looks of it, they're exactly like the musical versions of themselves. Anyways, Ram informed us (as Mr Allen's messenger) that for the next few weeks until Halloween's over, we'll be doing muscle training along with usual singing rehearsals. I think today's Fight For Me was so bad until we need to bulk up a little. Mac is worried about Big Fun though, she worries about Chandler's CG when Kurt lifts her up to mime sex during the song. Duke was so happy that she knew what CG meant, she cried a little. Speaking of her, I'm wondering if Mac's plan will work. Like, the haunted house is supposed to be dark and shit? Oh well, I should go to sleep. I have a quiz on Calculus for first period tomorrow._

 _-Veronica]_

"Or should I review my material first...?" Veronica muttered to herself as she stared at a Calculus assessment book she bought for practice. Before her brain could finalise her decision, her phone buzzed with an incoming message. "Seriously?! It's close to midnight!"

 _Lohstgirl: [hiiii]_

 _Lohstgirl: [ur veronica sawyer right?]_

 _Veronica: [Uh yes, you're... Brooke from the Halloween group right? How can I help you?]_

 _Lohstgirl: [yippee u remembered!]_

 _Lohstgirl: [oh u kno a heather duke right? since ur both from the same musical n all]_

 _Veronica: [Yeah, what about her?]_

 _Lohstgirl: [ok sooo im not rlly sure if i shld be asking u this]_

 _Lohstgirl: [but does she goes to a psyhicatrist every friday 4pm?]_

"... Why is Brooke asking me this out of the blue? This is really suspicious." Veronica muttered, re-reading her text. "Really suspicious indeed."

 _Lohstgirl: [hellooooo?]_

 _Veronica: [Yeah yeah, I'm here.]_

 _Veronica: [Why are you asking me this out of a sudden? I mean, yeah she does. How do you know it's her though?]_

 _Lohstgirl: [i saw the counter lady giving her more meds last week?]_

 _Lohstgirl: [n like she has her signtutuwe green clothse]_

 _Lohstgirl: [oh right context]_

 _Lohstgirl: [i hv depression, n melly has anxiety, so our schedules r back to back]_

 _Lohstgirl: [her appointment is probs before mine?]_

 _Lohstgirl: [wanna ask if shes ok, shes a cool gurl u kno...]_

 _Veronica: [So you also know about her condition?]_

"Fuck... probably shouldn't have said that." Veronica groaned at her texts, but she wanted to know more about Heather (Duke) even though it was from someone that she barely knew. _'I just pretended that I knew Duke's messed up!'_

 _Lohstgirl: [noooo her meds r diff frm ours, so can't tell_ X_X _]_

 _Lohstgirl: [besides i dun even kno her, but im rlly worried u kno]_

 _Lohstgirl: [its scary]_

 _Lohstgirl: [sorry, shldnt talk abt so sensitive shit to u. Gd nite!]_

"I should tell Mac about this..." Veronica said as she sent a screenshot of the conversation to Heather (McNamara). The latter replied instantly, with multiple 'fuck' texts streaming in.

 ** _Veronica sent an attachment._**

 _Mac: [fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck]_

 _Mac: [fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck]_

 _Mac: [fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck]_

 _Veronica: [Jesus Christ, stop!]_

 _Veronica: [I'm not so sure if we can trust Brooke though. Is there anyone else apart from Pauline who knows about her?]_

 _Mac: [chandler n jd]_

 _Mac: [she just told me tht brookes in the junior social skill class n they had an 'crossover']_

 _Veronica: [And what did she say about Brooke?]_

 _Mac: [uhhh she dun want to say]_

 _Mac: [shld ask jd tmr]_

 _Veronica: [Okay. I have a bad feeling about this...]_

 _Mac: [me too]_

 _Mac: [i think this wld be easier for me if she was actually trans]_

 _Veronica: [You're planning to ask her to remove whatever clothing that covers her arms right? How are you going to get her into the haunted house?]_

 _Mac: [can figure tht out ltr]_

 _Veronica: [Okay... I hope you know what you're doing.]_

 _Mac: [god help me too]_

 _Veronica: [And make sure you study for tomorrow's quiz.]_

 _Mac: [god help me again pls]_

"Okay, this time I'm really hitting the hay." Veronica placed her phone on silent mode, preparing to turn in for the night. Veronica tried her best to sleep, she truly did. However, her conversation with Brooke left her uneasy. Was what she said reliable? She seemed like the sociable and happy-go-lucky type from her texts in the haunted house chat group. Then again, Heather (Duke) was also sociable and happy-go-lucky in person. Veronica groaned, tossing about on her bed. Why couldn't her final year in high school be drama-free like what she wanted? She groaned a second time, her mind filled with worry, confusion and mild frustration.

 _'Gaaaaaah! If I didn't go for the auditions, I could still have my drama-free year! Then again... what would happen to Duke...?'_

XXXXXX

Whoops, seems like 'Be More Chill' has wormed its way in here. Don't worry though, they'll only be here for the Halloween part of the story. And as usual, practice sessions still run for the main cast. Just... not the way they wanted. Like, who the fuck wants to exercise for two hours straight? Honestly though, I made Brooke and Michael the ones with mental disorders as... uh... I read stories of them having disorders online? Brooke just has a larger role in this chapter to fuck with Veronica's and Mac's minds, surely you can't expect those two to carry out with their plan with so much doubt if their hypothesis is right or not? Okay, enough rambling. Thanks for reading up till now!


	8. Chapter 8

Hey Slushie Addict here! It's been a long while since I went to a proper haunted house so I actually have no idea how to go about it. The most recent one I went to was organised by some teachers, with only one person playing the role of a ghost. Hurled quite a few colourful words to that teacher so... not my finest moment. Thankfully for me, Halloween is a few chapters away. Anyways, I don't own Heathers!

XXXXXX

"Will Pauline Fleming please report to the principal's office immediately?" The principal's voice crackled over the PA system, asking for Pauline. Veronica heard it, and wondered why did Pauline, student council president and all-rounder in academics (apart from Poetry and Chemistry) and sports, need to see the principal. She didn't think much of it, she was currently doing a Calculus quiz and she needed all her brain cells to solve the questions. _'Huh, differentiate 5x^3+19x for twenty marks? It's either Mr Larry's birthday or he just wants to pass Mac badly.'_

"You have ten minutes left." Mr Larry, Veronica's Calculus teacher, announced. Veronica could hear a 'shit' behind her, most likely an indicator that Heather (McNamara) was nowhere near finishing the quiz. "... McNamara, I've already told you this before, please do the questions you know how to do first."

"Not that! My pen ran outta ink! Veronica, you have one I could borrow?" Heather groaned, hurling her pen to the floor. Veronica shrugged, handing her a pen. Mr Larry simply shook his head and went back to the teacher's table, playing with his phone as he waited for the ten minutes to be up. The ten minutes soon flew by, and Mr Larry got up to announce the end of the quiz. "Booyah! I actually completed a quiz for once!"

"Why are there so many ink smears?!" Mr Larry asked, holding up Heather's paper. Heather smiled, her fingers smeared with ink. Veronica grimaced, wondering what was her fate of her pen that she had lent to Heather. "... I'm not going to ask. Just get outta here kids."

"Finally! How was the quiz Veronica?" Heather asked, wiping off the stained ink off her fingers. Veronica gave a thumbs-up, considering that she breezed past the test within half-an-hour. "That's good. Oh yeah, I felt my phone buzzing during the quiz. Haven't checked it yet, but I bet it's about the musical."

"Let's see here..." Veronica said, pulling out her phone from her bag and glancing at the messages. "Nope, it's the Halloween group."

 ** _Fleming added DLJ to 'Haunted House committee'._**

 ** _Fleming added Sheriff Woody to_** ** _'Haunted House committee'._**

 ** _Fleming added Niel's Pruners to_** ** _'Haunted House committee'._**

 ** _Fleming added QH to_** ** _'Haunted House committee'._**

 ** _Fleming added Ollieollieoxenfree to_** ** _'Haunted House committee'._**

 _Fleming: [Trust me, I'm being forced to put them in]_

 _Fleming: [Principal's orders]_

 _JakeyD: [the fk who t they]_

 _McNamara: [oh shit]_

 _McNamara: [all the teachs tht banned me frm their classes r here]_

 _DLJ: [n whose fault is it thr we r all here?!]_

 _Veronica: [Honestly? Yours. Why the fuck did you ban someone just because she disrupts your lesson?!]_

 _QH: [Wow Derry, you're a dick]_

 _Veronica: [Uh hello, you're not any better.]_

 _QH: [OK to be fair, she was a legit hazard]_

 _QH: [But hey, seeing her at practice yesterday changed my opinion towards her]_

 _McNamara: [veronica the goody two shoes standing up to two teachs]_

 _McNamara: [i must screenshot this ltr]_

 _Fleming: [To the juniors in this group, teachers are here because they fucked up]_

 _Fleming: [End of story]_

 _Jenna's Rolan: [That means we gotta act polite and shit here online?! Booooo!]_

 _Veronica: [Oh fuck it, just treat them like students]_

 _Veronica: [By the way Pauline, where ARE we going to have the haunted house?]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [Oh Ms McNamara, I apologise for not letting you into my classes.]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [You see, SOMEONE told me that you were gravely ill but pushed yourself to attend my classes, so I banned you such that you get ample rest.]_

 _DLJ: [hi im someone]_

 _QH: [Anyhoo, the P said that we have the whole of Level 4 to work with]_

 _QH: [SOOOOO NO CHEM CLASSES UNTIL THEN WOO!]_

 _JakeyD: [jc i thot we r crazy]_

 _Fleming: [Yeah, and most of my classes are cancelled]_

 _Fleming: [PA will announce this later, by the way I'll do up a list and send you the pic for duties]_

 _McNamara: [cool]_

 _McNamara: [btw wheres ms shears n tht maths jackass?]_

 _Ollieollieoxenfree: [watch ur tone young lady]_

 _Ollieollieoxenfree: [ur this close to gettinf kicked out again]_

 _McNamara: [yea yea n we hv blackmail of u too]_

 _Jenna's Rolan: [Oh and I have loooadsss of gossip on you too Mr Oliver!]_

 _QH: [Ollie, I won't piss them off if I were you]_

 _QH: [The drama people now possess online blackmail of me]_

 _QH: [And we all know how Jenna can't shut her motherfucking trap for a second]_

 _Ollieollieoxenfree: [wtffff this is illegal!]_

 _DLJ: [yea yea whatev, shut up already]_

 _DLJ: [dun spam this grp too much, we hv lives to u kno]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [No he does not.]_

 _QH: [Rt]_

 _Ollieollieoxenfree: [rt]_

 _Veronica: [Conclusion, the teachers in this school are basically older teens.]_

"That's pretty mean for you." Heather smirked, muting the group temporarily. Veronica shrugged, the teachers were acting like them online. It made her wonder why did they had to respect them when the adults were probably more immature than the students themselves. "Still no signs of Ms Shears online. You think she's in the middle of a fuck session with a teacher right now?"

"Hah. Which teacher would do that with her? Besides, she's married."

"Mrs Suzie's married and it didn't stop her from fucking Ms Religion."

"You can ask Jenna later then, I mean she's literally the queen of gossip in Westerburg!"

"Sure sure, let's just get to our next class."

XXXXXX

"Okay so, you think it'll be a good idea for us to tell Mr Allen that we should swap Mac and Chandler during 'Big Fun'. What if he doesn't agree?" Kurt asked, with most of the main cast sharing the same class as him. In fact, the only two people who didn't take Creative Writing as a class were JD and Pauline, who was in a different year from them in the first place. "Like, you know how pissy he is lately."

"Okay for starters, we're requesting this change due to valid concerns. Chandler is two centimetres shorter than you. If you carried her like in the Broadway musical, how tall would you two be? The combined height will definitely be too dangerous for you to mime sex with her." Heather (Duke) pointed out, glancing at Heather (Chandler) and then Kurt.

"Why don't we just follow the one by Rock River Repertory Theatre? Ram's the one lifting Duke during the song." Martha suggested, her brown eyes nervously fluttering. The main cast took a moment to consider Martha's suggestion, it was a decent solution to their concern after all.

"I mean, that sounds fine with me. I'm just worried that Mr Allen may not like it as it's not following Broadway..." Veronica said, indicating her agreement. Ram and Kurt nodded, with the Heathers having varied expressions. "Heathers, what do you guys think?"

"I'm not sure... I'm okay with getting hoisted by Ram, but it's Chandler's and Mac's part that may not be good. Like, it started of with Mac getting down like she was proposing right? It doesn't seem to settle well with me, considering that it's all about fucking." Heather (Duke) sighed, their main problem was really Mr Allen. If he didn't agree, they would have to go through with their concerns.

"Look at it this way, Mac is in love with Kurt so it makes sense for her to go down." Heather (McNamara) pointed out, eyeing the last Heather. "Chandler, what do you have to say about this?"

"I-I think it doesn't seem right of musical McNamara to be the one penetrating musical Kurt during the song..." Heather (Chandler) spoke up, her gaze on the tiled floor of the classroom. The rest groaned, they were never going to solve their concern with differing issues to Martha's solution.

"Mr Allen is such a bitch. If only he was more flexible..." Veronica muttered, with the other six nodding along in agreement. "Is he the only teacher in charge of us?"

"Yeah. So if we have any problems, it all has to go through Allen-man."

"Well fuck. I don't think blackmailing him will work in this case, we all know how passionate he is when it comes to drama."

"Why not kidnap him?" An eight voice suggested, prompting the seven students to turn around. The eight voice belonged to a woman of average height and had her strawberry blonde hair tied into a French braid swept over her left shoulder. The students audibly gasped at the suggestion, horrified that she suggested a criminal activity to them. "What? Oh right, your usual teacher is out so I'm subbing."

"Ms Wellins, you do realise that's illegal right?" Veronica asked the woman, who now had a sickly sweet smile plastered on her face. "... You're scaring us here."

"Look, I have some beef with Allen. All I'm saying is to bring him over to my basement and lock him up for a few days." Ms Wellins continued, probably with the full knowledge that she knew what she was saying. "Besides, the only downside is that it's out of power. Probably. I can't get the bloodstains out but not like he can see it unless he has luminol..."

"... Yeeeeah that makes us _not_ want to take up on your offer."

"But V, what if it can really change his mind?" Ram asked, with Veronica shaking her head furiously. "... Fine, I'll text him and see whether he's cool with our original idea."

"Please do." Veronica sighed, noticing that Ms Wellins was still in front of them. "... You can go back now?"

"I have some business with you Sawyer. And by the same vein, McNamara too." Veronica and Heather (McNamara) raised at eyebrow, wondering what the teacher wanted with them. "It's related to the Halloween event you're in charge of, the principal said that I could assist the committee by providing decorations."

"Really? That would be fucking awesome. What decos do you have?" Heather asked, with the teacher pulling out her phone and showing the two girls pictures of numerous Halloween decorations. Veronica hoped that those were simply decorations, because the skeletons looked a little _too_ real for her tastes. "Hey Veronica, look at that sweet skeleton!"

"Remind me to avoid the haunted house on that day." Heather (Duke) muttered, shivering at the mere thought of Halloween.

XXXXXX

 _Veronica: [Good news guys, Ms Wellins is providing us with decos!]_

 _Veronica: [And she also offered us to help out with the makeup on that day!]_

 _CC: [That's great news!]_

 _CC: [We need to discuss how should we go about the haunted house though. 'QH' said that it's the whole of level 4? Is it real Polly?]_

 _Fleming: [God don't call me that]_

 _Fleming: [Not even Sawyer or JD calls me that]_

 _Fleming: [But Ms Qing is right, it is indeed the whole of level 4]_

 _JakeyD: [ooh how abt like a haunted sch]_

 _Slushieboi: [lol then how r we going to make lvl 4 look creepy w/o spoiling the surprise]_

 _McNamara: [we could put up curtains]_

 _McNamara: [i hv some hella black ones at home]_

 _Richitlit: [woah woah, then whos gonna put it up?]_

 _Richislit: [only jakey n jerry r tall enough]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [Might I be of assistance?]_

 _Richislit: [wow who the fk invited cowboy here?]_

 _Fleming: [You didn't read the messages above did you]_

 _Richislit: [nopeee]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [To do that though, we have to seal off all the stairwells except for one.]_

 _CC: [Oh how about we don't seal off two stairs, one for entrance and one for exit!]_

 _CC: [And then we seal off part of the level for us scarers to prepare ourselves!]_

 _Jerry's Heere: [we need a lot of materials just for sealing then]_

 _Jerry's Heere: [n a solid plan]_

 _McNamara: [ok so all for haunted sch layout right?]_

 _McNamara: [we need to think of a theme for us]_

 _Veronica: [Serial killers?]_

 _Slushieboi: [zombieeeees!]_

 _Fleming: [Tortured class?]_

 _McNamara: [...wow we r a wreck]_

 _QH: [How about the deranged serial teacher killer, students involved in a lab accident zombies and sadistic teacher trope?]_

 _CC: [Let's just stick to the serial killer who happens to be a teacher]_

 _Slushieboi: [tbh i thot qh meant someone kills teachers]_

 _QH: [I have a name you know!]_

 _JakeyD: [idgf]_

 _JakeyD: [where r we going to get a teacher to be the serial killer]_

 _QH: [I dunno, someone who looks intimidating?]_

 _QH: [Woody?]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [Hard pass.]_

 _QH: [JakeyD guy then]_

 _JakeyD: [whut no, why me?]_

 _JakeyD: [n u just complained abt the name thing! hypocrite]_

 _QH: [Blah blah blah, tall people are intimidating and powerful]_

 _QH: [And I'm a teacher, I can call you brats whatever the fuck I want]_

 _Veronica: [As someone who has to work with Mr Allen constantly, I pity you. Jake, the teachers here are mostly immature so suck it up.]_

 _Fleming: [Rt]_

 _McNamara: [rt]_

 _Jerry's Heere: [hey why not ms shears? she's like wicked tall too]_

 _McNamara: [pffft yea rite]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [Mr Heere has a point, she's tall, knows her way with a knife, and is on the brink of insanity.]_

 _Veronica: [Jesus Christ why hasn't she seen a doctor yet?!]_

 _QH: [Domestic_ _issues]_

"Attention to all students and teachers, the whole of Level 4 will be used for Halloween so lessons scheduled in classrooms on that level will be cancelled. I repeat, the whole of Level 4 will be used for Halloween so lessons scheduled in classrooms on that level will be cancelled." The principal's voice crackled through the PA system, sending students into loud cheering while some teachers groaned in frustration. Veronica heard it, and wondered if the principal was a fan of haunted houses given that they had a large area to work with now.

 _Veronica: [Welp, lessons are officially cancelled now.]_

 _Fleming: [You're telling me, most of my lessons are cancelled ahead of time]_

 _QH: [Hey teaching almost everyone Chemistry is tiring OK]_

 _QH: [Since we're going for a serial murder trope, any idea how to make fake blood?]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [We can ask Sharon later?]_

 _QH: [She'll probably give us real blood and a few actual bodies]_

 _Veronica: [... I suddenly don't feel very safe going over to her house now...]_

 _McNamara: [rt]_

 _QH: [I'm coming with you two later]_

 _QH: [Seriously, she's dangerous in a dormant way]_

"I am officially scared of Ms Wellins now." Veronica commented, going offline from the messaging app. _'What does 'dangerous in a dormant way' mean anyways?'_

XXXXXX

"Okay you maggots! We're going to do 'Big Fun' now and due to some protests from the main cast yesterday, Mac will be dancing with Kurt. You guys should know where." Mr Allen announced, sending a glare that made everyone involved in the song scurry into place. "We're going to start the song straight away, and you guys better not fuck this up!"

"That's what you tell us every time." Heather (Duke) commented, earning herself a scowl from the teacher. Mr Allen was accompanied by Ms Wellins, for whatever reason the students didn't dare to ask. "Okay, okay fine. I'll shut up now."

"ACTION!"

 _Dad says 'act your age'. You heard the man, it's time to rage!_

 _Blast the bass, turn out the lights, ain't nobody home tonight!_

 _Drink, smoke, it's all cool! Let's get naked in my pool!_

 _Punch the wall and start a fight, ain't nobody home tonight!_

 _"H-Hiiiis f-folks got a waterbed... C-Come..._ Aaaaargh!" Kurt groaned as she tried to carry Heather (McNamara) up, his arms quivering greatly. Heather prayed that he wouldn't drop her to the ground immediately, it would hurt a lot if he did. "Y-Y-You're too h-h-heavy...!"

"I'm 63 kilos! How the fuck is that heavy?!" Heather asked, slapping Kurt. Kurt's legs were also shaking, and it looked like he was about to collapse any moment. "Put me down if you can't carry me."

"I-I-I can't feel my a-arms!"

"Ram! Go over and help Kurt already!" Mr Allen ordered, throwing his hands up into the air. "God damn it!"

"Okay... so we have another concern. Great." Veronica sighed as she watched Ram supporting Heather and slowly brought her down. "Mr Allen, why don't we follow Rock River Repertory Theatre's choreography for this part?"

"Hmm... Okay fine. Ram, you'll swap places with Kurt during the whatever theatre's choreography for that part of the song. Chandler's too tall for Kurt to mime a threesome with. Mac, Kurt, Chandler, you'll face the opposite way when you guys have that threesome such that Mac is the first one. Got it all of you?"

"Wouldn't that throw off the other parts of the Broadway choreography?" JD asked, something that Martha failed to consider. Mr Allen looked like he was about to murder someone, but he eventually calmed down enough to formulate a reply.

"You're right JD. Everyone, you have exactly an hour to mimic every single detail of the choreography of that blasted theatre's 'Big Fun'! All of it!" Mr Allen announced, exiting the auditorium. Ms Wellins went over to Veronica and Heather (Chandler), the latter yelping as she arrived.

"Is Allen always like this?" Veronica nodded, while Heather shrunk away from her Social Skills teacher. "Hmm, I guess I should actually kidnap him soon."

"Please do, that way we can have Ms Religion as our teacher-in-charge and she's way better." Veronica replied, hoping that what Ms Wellins said was simply a joke. "Thanks for giving us the decos by the way, you sure you don't need 'em?"

"Not anymore. Being associated to a serial killer and a kidnapper sucks big time, so might as well to make my parents' house safe for trick-or-treating." Ms Wellins shrugged, with Heather shrinking even more away from her teacher after hearing the criminal part. "I'm expecting Lohst and Mell to be here right now... Where are they?"

"You also teach Social Skills to the juniors?"

"Meh, believe me when I say that there's a lack of teachers who want to teach Social Skills as a subject. They claim that being sociable is part of 'human nature'." Ms Wellins rolled her grey eyes, with two students that Veronica had never seen before cautiously entering the auditorium as though the students part of the musical would eat them up alive. "And speak of the devil... you two are late."

"Sorry Ms Wellins! We kinda got ourselves held up!" One of the students answered, a bright grin on her face. Veronica immediately assumed that the girl was in fact Brooke Lohst, one of the Halloween committee members. That would mean that the other student was Michael Mell, another student unlucky enough to be working with the committee. "Wow! Are they the performers for the musical at the end of the year? Cool! We should totes sign up for it next year!"

"Christine would be thrilled!" The other student replied, a small smile on his tanned skin. Veronica compared the juniors to JD and Chandler, and wondered why do the two juniors, who looked sociable enough, attended Social Skills. Heather simply blinked at them, then her naturally pale face paled even more.

"Oh hey Heather!" Brooke chirped, scaring said student greatly. Heather immediately bolted out of the auditorium, not surprising Veronica that much. "Shit, what did I do wrong this time?"

"Meh, she'll come back. Eventually." Heather (Duke) said, having approached them a while ago but was unnoticed. "Veronica, have you memorised your parts yet?"

"Oh fuck, I haven't. Shit. Nice talking to you Ms Wellins." Veronica ran towards where Kurt, Ram, Heather (McNamara) and even Martha were, while Heather (Duke) left to find those in charge of bringing the pig for the song.

"Man, I hope that we won't have to dance so much if we audition for the play next year." Michael commented, watching Ram trying his best to 'fuck' a plush pig that someone had brought.

XXXXXX

"And ACTION!" Mr Allen yelled, his loud voice now a comfortable thing to hear for the performers. The backstage performers danced slightly to the song, cheering as the Heathers and Veronica stood on the second level of the stage. Ram and Kurt were jumping up and down, as though to liven up their 'party'.

 _Dad says 'act your age'. You heard the man, it's time to rage!_

 _Blast the bass, turn out the lights, ain't nobody home tonight!_

 _Drink, smoke, it's all cool! Let's get naked in my pool!_

 _Punch the wall and start a fight, ain't nobody home tonight!_

 _His folks got a waterbed! Come upstairs and rest your head!_

Heather (McNamara) was on the floor with one knee, as though she was proposing to Kurt. Heather (Chandler) was leaning slightly on Kurt, not making the mistake of placing her full weight on him like what Veronica did in 'Fight For Me'. Slightly away from them were Ram and Heather (Duke), with the latter carried up. To make things more risqué, Ram was instructed to place his hands on Heather (Duke)'s ass to send a message to the audience that he was feeling her up. Heather (Chandler) then ran her hand (which was on Kurt's lower back) up Kurt's back, forcefully turning him over when her hand reached his shoulder. Veronica and the rest was supposed to watch on in amusement, and for once everything was going well. At least for the time being.

 _Let's rub each other's backs while watching porn on Cinemax!_

This was probably one of the few scenes that had mistakes made but still gained Mr Allen's approval. One of them being how Kurt's hands was supposed to be around Heather (Chandler)'s waist when miming the threesome and not on her genital region or her chest. Still, Heather herself didn't really show any discomfort even though her friends knew it was most likely uncomfortable for her. The second mistake made was that Heather (Duke) was supposed to wave her hand around in a frenzied circular motion to indicate her excitement at the party, not a slow and seductive circular motion. Mr Allen didn't say anything about it, but one look at his face and everyone knew that he was pleased at the mistakes made.

 _Ahhhhhh...!_

 _The folks are gone!_

 _It's time for big fun! (Big fun!)_

 _We're up till dawn!_

 _Having some big fun! (Big fun!)_

 _When mom and dad forget to lock the liquor cabinet!_

 _It's big fun! (Big fun!)_

 _Big fuuuuuun! Whoo!_

 _"Okay okay, so it's salt, then lime, then shot?"_ Veronica asked Heather (McNamara), who was beside her. Veronica gulped, she realised a second too late that she had said the lines to the Broadway version and not the new one. Mr Allen hadn't said anything yet, but Veronica flashed a pleading look at Heather (Chandler), who nodded subtly.

 _"No it's salt then shot-"_ Heather (McNamara) had noticed Veronica's pleading look towards Heather (Chandler), and decided to play along instead of stopping abruptly. Heather (Chandler) jerked her head suddenly towards Veronica, a glare appearing on her face as she proceeded to angrily yell out her lines.

 _"You're doing it wrong!"_

 _"Really? Cause I feel great!" _Veronica giggled, tottering her way towards Heather (Chandler) but was stopped by an actor.

 _"Veronica, you're lookin' good tonight!"_ The actor said, walking away from Veronica afterwards. Veronica stared at his back in shock then sported a silly grin which made Heather (Duke) slightly jealous for some reason.

 _"Whoa. A hot guy smiled at me, without a trace of mockery!"_

 _Everyone's high as a kite, ain't nobody home tonight!_

 _Stoned, zoned, I should quit..._

 _Hey, is that weed? I want a hit!_

 _Fill that joint and roll it tight, ain't nobody home tonight!_

 _Dreams are coming true, when people laugh but not at you!_

 _I'm not alone, I'm not afraid, I feel like Bono at Live Aid!_

 _Ahhhhhh...!_

 _The house is ours!_

 _It's time for big fun! (Big fun!)_

 _Let's use their showers!_

 _That sounds like big fun! (Big fun!)_

 _Crack open one more case!_

 _I think that's what they call third base._

Veronica pointed to two fellow actresses making out on stage, but what she fail to realise that the 'couple' actually consisted of Heather (McNamara) and Heather (Chandler). Everyone else stared at them, with Heather (Chandler) supporting the other Heather's left leg just like what Ram was originally supposed to do with Heather (McNamara) should they had followed the Broadway version. Veronica didn't understand why the rest stopped singing, and only realised after Mr Allen yelled to pause the rehearsal.

"CUT! Heathers, what the fuck?!" The two Heathers broke apart, a giddy smile on Heather (Chandler)'s face. "You two aren't supposed to make out at all! Where's Tim and Lucy?!"

"They're absent from school." One of the backstage actors replied, with Mr Allen groaning at the response.

"Pray tell why do you two decide that it's a fucking rad idea to be the ones making out in this song? You two are the popular mains, and in that era, popular people don't show the whole world that they're gay. There's a reason why 'I Love My Dead Gay Son' exists!" Mr Allen seethed, his glares looked as though they were about to kill. Ms Wellins would have restrained him, if it weren't for the fact that she had left early which left Mr Allen the sole teacher to oversee the rehearsals.

"Hey I mean, no one volunteered to take over..." Heather (McNamara) started, sheepishly running her hand through her blonde hair. Heather (Chandler) had a flushed look on her face, and blurted out something that nobody, not even the main cast, had expected.

"I-I wanted to use this opportunity to kiss the girl that I love most! So Jason, please don't suggest to Ram that you want to 'make out' with her again!" Most of them gasped, not because they were homophobic but because Heather fucking Chandler, one of the shyest people in Westerburg High School, publicly confessed to Heather (McNamara). From the expression on the recipient's face, it was obvious that she was extremely flattered and happy to know that Heather (Chandler) liked her.

"I... wow. You mean it? Like, it's not something JD put you up to?"

"Hey! I'm not that kinda guy!" JD hollered from the back of the auditorium, indignant that someone actually thought that he would pull such a joke. Even _he_ knew that playing around with someone's feelings was too cruel. Mr Allen sighed, shaking his head.

"You know what, practice is cancelled for today. Go have fun at some McDonald's or something."

XXXXXX

"To Chandler for growing some balls!" JD cheered, lifting up a glass of alcohol. They were currently at Heather (Duke)'s house, and JD had somehow found alcohol within the house. How he did that was a mystery, but as long as he drank in small amounts, everyone else was willing to let his actions slide for one night. "Like seriously, I didn't expect you to confess to her in front of so many people!"

"That's like, totes, what I wanna do when I find someone special." Kurt agreed, holding up a can of beer. "How do you feel Mac?"

"Super fucking happy that the girl I've been crushing on for _years_ is mine." Heather (McNamara) replied, holding up a bottle of vodka. "Let's get fucking wasted tonight!"

"Where the hell are you guys getting all that alcohol?! I'm pretty sure I hid them quite well!" Heather (Duke) asked, surveying the room they were in. From what she could tell, Pauline and Martha were the only ones clearly sober apart from herself. Even Veronica and Heather (Chandler) were slightly drunk, though it was most likely due to JD. Heather (Duke) sighed, she regretted not throwing out the alcohol when she had the chance. _'Oh yeah, where's Mrs Chandler? I should get her to help me toss out whatever alcohol's left... I really shouldn't have tried to drink and hide 'em in my house...'_

"Dude, hiding them under your bed ain't considered 'quite well'." Heather (McNamara) laughed, tossing a can of lemonade at the host. "Assuming that you're not going to get drunk tonight, here's something to make you go sour."

"And cheat on your girlfriend of two hours? Your balls are big indeed." The two Heathers laughed, wondering if anyone else heard their conversation. "Seriously though, don't cheat on Chandler."

"I'm monogamous!" Heather (McNamara) replied, sliding up to her friend before Heather (Duke) realised it. "Why don't you take your hoodie off? It's pretty warm in here."

"Want me to turn up the A/C for you?"

"No need, just worrying about you. We don't want our host to have a fucking heatstroke here. A broken nose is probably enough for you yeah?"

"Meh, I just like wearing a hoodie indoors." Heather (McNamara) eyed her suspiciously but didn't say anything, choosing to hang out with JD and Heather (Chandler). Heather (Duke) shrugged, going over to Veronica who was willingly chugging down a mug (who and how did they get that?) of beer. "Veronica, how you holding up?"

"Note to self, _always_ steer clear of the guys when the booze is out." Veronica groaned, her face flushed from the alcohol she had consumed. Heather nodded, offering her the lemonade that Heather (McNamara) had given a while back. "Is that lemonade?"

"Yeah, it's super sour so it's good!" Heather grinned, her smile dropping from her face after seeing the look of horror on Veronica's face. "Oh shit... I forgot that you don't like sour stuff. Sorry about that, I'll go find you something else..."

"N-No! Nononononono, lemonade's just fine! Gimme!" Veronica lunged for the canned drink in Heather's hand, nearly falling flat on her face if the latter didn't catch her. "Whoops~ Thanks for catching me you sexy spiker~"

"Veronica, you're pretty wasted aren't you? Geez, how much did the guys force you to drink...?" Heather sighed, helping Veronica up. Veronica simply giggled, grabbing the can from Heather and opening it. She gulped it down, her face all scrunched up afterwards. "... Technically I did tell you it's sour so... not my fault."

"Don't worry, sour things snap me back to sobriety." Veronica gagged, she really disliked the sour citrus taste lingering on her tongue but at least it helped to prevent herself from making a fool out of herself in front of her crush. "Did I say anything weird just now before I drank the lemonade?"

"Well... I'm surprised you know that I usually spike the ball during volleyball matches." Veronica's face went red again, this time out of embarrassment. After all, could she actually admit to her crush that she kept a memo of all of the volleyball competitions Heather was involved in? The answer was a big fat no by the way, unless she wanted to make a fool out of herself in front of Heather. "I uh... you know, I'm kinda scared that my teammates may see me as a hindrance given that I'm out of commission for two months."

"What?! No way, they won't see you that way Duke! From what I know about team sports, everyone is important. If one of the links is weakened, the other links will protect it!" Heather's smiled deprecatingly, patting Veronica's unruly hair tenderly. "Ahhhhh! D-Don't touch it, my hair's in a mess!"

"Aw c'mon, it's fluffy!" Veronica pouted, but allowed Heather to continue patting it. "Say, I know today is Mac's birthday and all... but is it really a good idea to let her get fucking wasted? As a host that's also her best friend, I actually feel morally conflicted...?"

"Birthday...?" Veronica repeated, blinking once. Then twice. Then... "OH MY FUCKING GOD I TOTALLY FORGOT THAT IT'S MAC'S BIRTHDAY!"

"JESUS FUCKING CHRIST I FORGOT THAT TODAY'S MY BIRTHDAY!" Heather (McNamara) exclaimed, nearly spilling her drink all over the floor. She slapped her forehead, now understanding why she hadn't seen Mrs Chandler (yes she did notice that Mrs Chandler wasn't around). Mrs Chandler was out getting the cake for Heather's celebration, and Heather (Duke) had offered to host a small celebration for her best friend two days ago.

"You seriously thought that I'm allowing you guys to turn my house upside down just because Chandler confessed to you? God damn it, remember your own birthday bitch." Heather (Duke) sighed, with Heather (Chandler) laughing awkwardly in response. "Hey Chandler, did you confess to Mac today because it's her birthday?"

"... 50/50?" Heather (Duke) groaned, she had gained some respect towards Heather (Chandler) for actually treating her confession as a birthday present. On the bright side, Heather (Chandler) was completely in love with Heather (McNamara) and vice-versa, so it's not like in ended on a sour note. "W-What did you get for her?"

"A lecture-free night on how she shouldn't be drinking alcohol in the first place."

"Wow, I can't believe I'm saying this but you two can be jerks sometimes." Pauline commented, holding up a glass of milk. Heather (Chandler) panicked while Heather (Duke) rolled her eyes at the comment, as though it wasn't obvious. "To be fair, most of us forgotten McNamara's birthday so we aren't better off. Oh and thanks for inviting me even though I was at a student council meeting."

"Oh come on, I remember Martha's birthday!" Veronica grumbled, pulling her best friend into a tight hug. "It's not anytime soon though."

"Speaking of birthdays... you and Chandler share the same birthday, and it so happens to be on Christmas..." Heather (Duke) commented, her eyes immediately going over to the door connecting her house with the outside world upon hearing a rattling noise. Mrs Chandler entered the house with a white box, an apologetic smile on her face. "Oh Mrs Chandler! Thanks for picking up the cake for us, the birthday girl actually forgot that today's her birthday. And I sorta forgot that you were out because of the cake thing."

"Hey, I have a lot of things on my mind! Like how to catch up on the subjects that I'm recently un-banned from, the haunted house, this shit that FYI, you're the one who signed me up for." Heather (McNamara) shot back, a tense smile on her face. _'And also the scarily possible chance that you're depressed like what that Brooke girl told Veronica...'_

"Uh huh. Hey guys, cake's here!" Heather (Duke) called out, gaining the attention of the three inebriated men. They stumbled towards where the women were, barely missing Martha. "Dudes, how the fuck can you nearly hit Martha?! She's fucking big! No offense Martha."

"None taken. Ram, here's some water." Martha offered her boyfriend a glass of water, which the latter took and dumped it on his head. "... That's probably one way to sober up?"

"Okay guys, let's take a group picture before getting the birthday girl and her new girlfriend to cut the cake!" Heather (Duke) instructed, lighting up a yellow candle and sticking it in the middle of the cake. Mrs Chandler was holding up a professional camera, which actually belonged to Heather (Duke) as she needed it for her Photography classes. "Alright guys, huddle up before I fucking smash your heads onto the sink."

"... You could have just smashed their heads into the cake... I mean, we can eat it off them afterwards." Heather (McNamara) whispered as she waited for the photo to be taken.

"I'm not going to waste a 50 dollar cake on three drunk dudes that I didn't really invite."

"... Point made."

XXXXXX

"So we're all having an impromptu sleepover because half of us are drunk as hell." Veronica deadpanned at her sleeping friends, the only ones who were awake apart from herself were Heather (Duke) and Heather (McNamara). Heather (Duke) was currently showering even though it was already 1 am, so the only ones awake in Mr and Mrs Duke's bedroom were Veronica and Heather (McNamara). "How peachy."

"You don't expect Duke to let us go back home drunk right?" Heather (McNamara) raised one eyebrow, faking outrage at Veronica's comment. "Anyways, did her lips loosen up a little just now?"

"She mentioned that she was worried that she'll be a burden to her volleyball teammates when she gets back, but that's about it."

"I'll take whatever implies that she's fucked up." Heather (McNamara) sighed, fiddling with her smartphone. "She's really not easy to crack..."

"... Is it really okay for us to be doing this behind her back? Like, if she's really depressed or whatever, that's probably up to her to tell us or not right? I mean... these stuff are usually personal..."

"If she was normal, then yeah we're pretty much the bad guys here. However, she has a tendency to bottle up whatever shit's in there until the bottle goes kaboom." Heather replied, letting out a yawn. "... You love Duke right?"

"W-Well yes... but I always thought that she's someone who's out of my reach... At first, I thought she's the typical popular girl who's super sociable and friendly... now I learnt that she's not some goddess. In fact, none of us are perfect. And that's okay." Veronica mumbled, going off tangent from Heather's question. "I still love her, whether she's fucked up or not. What I should be more concerned with is whether she likes me back."

"Oh for the love of whatever's holy, I just told you two days ago that she had been checking you out since freshman year! She loves you more than you can imagine but because she thinks that she's not worthy or some shit, you'll never hear from her mouth that she loves you so fucking much!"

"I-I'm kind of insecure about it alright?! Not everyone can be like you and Chandler!"

"Oh come on, if it weren't for Tim's and Lucy's absence, I probably wouldn't get confessed to?!"

"She just admitted that it was 50/50! She basically admitted that half of the reason she confessed to you was because today-or yesterday, ah fuck it, is your birthday!"

"Tim and Lucy were catalysts here!"

"I'm glad that you guys are getting along, but you guys are noisy." Heather (Duke) groaned, stepping out of the bathroom (there was one in every room). The two women turned their heads to the host, faces paling as they realised that Heather (Duke) could easily hear what they were conspiring to do. "You know I can hear everything right?"

"You will forget everything or I'll punch the living daylights out of you with my right fist." Heather (McNamara) threatened, holding up her prosthetic fist. Heather (Duke) rolled her eyes but said nothing in response. Instead, she made her way towards the door.

"I'm going back to my own room, please tone it down. The walls here are thin as fuck." Heather warned, closing the door behind her with a soft thud.

"... Fuck, she said she heard _everything_ right?" Heather (McNamara)'s usual boisterous was now replaced with a hushed whisper, her green eyes growing as wide as saucers. Veronica gulped, nodding resolutely. "... What are the chances of her being an amnesiac if I punch her real hard?"

"Mac, that's a terrible idea. But not terrible enough for me to not consider it." Over in the next room, Heather (Duke) was listening on the two awake women's conversation, covering her head with her pillow. Whatever she had heard, she certainly didn't want to get herself beaten up by her best friend. Even though what she had heard was about her (self-considered) dark secret. She pulled down her black wristbands that she wore to sleep, revealing numerous fresh horizontal scars on both wrists.

 _'... I should maybe come clean soon, can't exactly hide them from those two forever right?'_

XXXXXX

You know, when they say the school year starts in September, do they actually mean the first day of September or the first Monday of September? It's really confusing... and yay, Mac's birthday! Okay well, I kinda forgotten which week is it but 28 September (made up birthday for Mac) is actually on a Thursday in 2017, so it fits with the criteria that rehearsals are on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Oh well, next chapter probably involves a hell lot of exercise since Ms Religion wanted some members on the main cast to do some muscle training...


	9. Chapter 9

Hey Slushie Addict here! So this chapter will most likely contain exercising and info about the upcoming Halloween event that most of the characters are looking forward to! What? I'm not the type to plan things ahead... Anyways, I don't own Heathers!

XXXXXX

 _Fleming: [I did up a list for the duties]_

 _Fleming: [Pay attention that it's ONLY for setting up the scene]_

 _Fleming: [We can discuss who does what on the actual day itself later]_

 _ **Fleming sent an attachment.**_

 _DLJ: [whuuuut]_

 _DLJ: [wtf why am i on light duty]_

 _Veronica: [What IS that?]_

 _Fleming: [He's in charge of making the lights flicker]_

 _DLJ: [is the school going to pay for any damages]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [Why are you asking?]_

 _DLJ: [in case we fk up on the day itself]_

 _Fleming: [... Maybe?]_

 _DLJ: [k]_

 _Jerry's Heere: [omg can somone type out the duty list?]_

 _Jerry's Heere: [my phone cant dl it]_

 _Fleming: [To view the downloadable content, please pay Pauline Fleming $20]_

 _Fleming: [... It's a DLC joke]_

 _Veronica: [It better be, you forced ME to pay you $50 last year.]_

 _Lohstgirl: [shiiiit so much spam]_

 _Valentine: [thats my line]_

 _Valentine: [who the fk r dlj n sheriff woody?!]_

 _Fleming: [What the fuck guys]_

 _Fleming: [ANY UNKNOWN CONTACTS YOU SEE HERE ARE ALL TEACHERS!]_

 _Fleming: [THERE'S MS QING, MR OLIVER, MS SHEARS, MR WOODY AND MR DERRY]_

 _Fleming: [SO STOP ASKING WHO ARE THEY FUCKERS!]_

 _Valentine: [well shit]_

 _Valentine: [i still owe ms shears that hmwk fm lasy yr]_

 _QH: [Be glad that she isn't online often then]_

 _QH: [Okay since Jeremy has been whining about the list, I'll send it down so PAY A BLOODY ATTENTION!]_

 _QH: [Lights duty: Derry, Oliver, Michael]_

 _QH: [Setting up curtains at the exits: Jake, Jeremy, Woody]_

 _QH: [Hallway decos: Valentine, CC]_

 _QH: [Room decos: QH, Brooke]_

 _QH: [Posters: Drama crew]_

 _QH: [Errand kids: Rich, Jenna]_

 _QH: [Broadcast: Danielle]_

 _CC: [Oh come on, why am I addressed as 'CC'?!]_

 _Valentine: [me too]_

 _Veronica: [Sorry but could you guys just stop texting? It's very hard for me to reply when I'm doing planks!]_

 _Richislit: [then mtye it]_

 _Veronica: [Just stop please?]_

"Hey Mac, we're supposed to do up posters for Halloween...!" Veronica groaned, her arms were starting to tremble after five minutes of being in the plank position. It was a Friday, but for some reason Mr Allen had coerced everyone apart from Pauline to stay back for an hour to exercise. Veronica felt like her arms were about to turn into jelly, her vision was starting to blur thanks to the sweat rolling down her forehead. It was a miracle that she had replied to some of their messages before asking them to end the conversation.

"Posters?! Well fuck me gently with a chainsaw, do I look like I can fucking draw?!" Heather (McNamara) asked, gritting her teeth as she did her best to ignore the numbness in her arms. She wanted to stand up and curse the life out of Mr Allen, or drop to the waxed floor and lie in a pool of her sweat. Unfortunately for her, both options were unavailable for her to choose as she was forced to exercise by Mr Allen.

"You do graffiti!"

"If you have seen my graffiti, you would be able to tell that it's crude vandalism!"

"Well fuck vandalism! You can draw and that's all we need!"

"Fine! I'll show it to you later after I add some tats on Mr Allen's car!"

"Oh no, you're not going _anywhere_ near my car!" Mr Allen angrily retorted, going over to Heather but slipping on her pool of sweat. "What the fuck?!"

"Not my fault jackass!"

"Urgh, _fine_. Everyone down!" The students dropped to the floor in exhaustion, save for Heather (Duke), Kurt and Ram. They got up immediately, but the two men groaned in pain. Only Heather (Duke) was truly unaffected by the exercise they were put through, and it said something about her fitness ability considering that Mr Allen made them do 20 ten-metres sprints, 50 push-ups and 50 sit-ups within 30 minutes beforehand. Martha was out of commission after nine sprints, she was currently resting in the infirmary after vomiting. "I think I sprained my ankle... Duke, help me to the nurse's office would you?"

"Why me?" Heather asked, though she complied with the teacher's request.

"You're the only one who doesn't look like you want to die."

 _'Ironically, I'm the only person here who actually wants to die.'_ Heather thought to herself, letting out a soft sigh. "Geez... Next time don't push them so hard then..."

"You know, isn't it weird that Ms Shears is the _only_ one who hasn't said a thing online?" Veronica asked Heather (McNamara), who let out a sound that can only be described as a combination of a groan and a scream of agony. "I'm going to check out their texts, they sent a whole lot when we were MIA..."

 _Veronica: [Exercise over, Mr Allen sprained his ankle.]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [Oh dear, want me to swing by and give you guys some ice pops?]_

 _McNamara: [why do u even hv them]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [... We teachers abuse the fridge to store our frozen supplies, Derry fills the freezer with ice pops.]_

 _Ollieollieoxenfree: [its so funny to see tht a teacher is admitting another teachers abuse]_

 _QH: [Oh shut up, you put your beers in there too]_

 _DLJ: [which u steal]_

 _Veronica: [Mr Woody, please bring the popsicles! Thank you so so so much!]_

 _McNamara_ _: [btw why isnt ms shears online?]_

 _CC: [Yeah I was wondering that too]_

 _CC: [Can I also have an ice pop if I swing by the auditorium?]_

 _Sheriff Woody: [Sure, we need to clear the freezer out if SOMEONE wants to sneak in more ice pops or vodka.]_

 _Niel's Pruners: [Hi I sneak in vodka]_

 _McNamara_ _: [holy shitttt]_

 _QH: [Back from your appointment already? It's only 3.30]_

 _Niel's Pruners: [My husband caught me there]_

 _Niel's Pruners: [He yelled at me]_

 _Niel's Pruners: [And made a mess of my psychiatrist's office]_

 _Niel's Pruners: [I'm thankful that he didn't hurt her though]_

 _Veronica: [... This is too much emotional baggage for me...]_

 _McNamara_ _: [yup]_

 _McNamara_ _: [dukes enough]_

 _Veronica: [Mac!]_

 _McNamara: [shit u guys see notuhing]_

 _McNamara: [will fk up all ur cars if u guys talk abt it]_

"I can't believe you Mac! You basically outed Duke to a group with teachers in it!" Veronica exclaimed, panicking at Heather's messages. Said woman was also panicking, she had just conveniently sent that message after seeing her own teacher admit that she had some issues she needed to iron out. "Oh my god, what if one of them confronts Duke about it?!"

"Bribe Oliver and Derry with something they like and they'll keep mum about it." The two women turned around to see a kindly man in his mid-30s behind them, his hands holding up two ice pops. "Hello girls, how are you two feeling?"

"Mr Woody! Thanks for swinging by!" Veronica beamed, instantly taking a purple ice pop. "We're not doing so hot, but we'll live."

"I'm more shocked that Ms Shears actually appeared in the group." Heather added, opening the other ice pop. "Like, I thought that's a dead number."

"Not really. Anyways, some of us already knew about Ms Duke's condition when we once accompanied Danielle for her appointments." Mr Woody replied, a smile on his handsome features. Veronica and Heather turned to look at each other, and back at the teacher.

"It's still too much emotional baggage for us to deal with."

XXXXXX

"Hey Duke, how's Martha?" Veronica asked, offering her one of the ice pops Mr Woody had generously given to those who were at the auditorium. "Christine came down with Brooke and Jake, so they also got some ice pops."

"Brooke? As in Brooke Lohst?" Heather (Duke) asked, raising her eyebrows. Veronica nodded, and wondered if her crush was going to admit that she has a psychiatric appointment every Friday. "Ah, Chandler had classes with her a few times. She called Brooke 'banana girl' and ever since then, she's been avoiding Brooke like the plague."

"That explained why Chandler ran away from Brooke yesterday." Veronica replied, connecting the dots together. _'Actually now that I think about it, are psychiatric appointments usually a weekly thing?'_

"Yup!" The atmosphere between them soon turned awkward, with no other topics to bring up. "So uh... this... this is kinda awkward huh?"

"A-Ahaha..." Veronica gulped, should she just outright ask Heather about her mental condition? She didn't want to risk ruining their friendship but... "Hey Duke?"

"Yeah?"

"Sh-" Veronica stopped, was this really the time to talk about it? Was the topic really worth expanding? Veronica couldn't imagine it, but she could vaguely make out a scene where Heather avoided her like the plague. "Sh-Should we hang out together this weekend?"

"Huh? Well I don't mind..." Heather replied, a surprised look on her face. Veronica didn't blame her, it was a really sudden suggestion that she made at the last minute. Way better than talking about her supposed appointment... "Oh, I gotta go. I'll text you which day I'm free alright? See ya!"

"S-See you." Veronica mumbled, with Heather running off. Veronica glanced at her phone, the screen reflecting '15.45'. _'It's 3.45 pm... and her appointment is at four... no wonder she was in a rush...'_ Her phone buzzed, receiving a new message from Pauline.

 _Fleming: [Right guys, draft out a poster for the haunted house by Sunday 9pm and send it here]_

 _Veronica: [What the fuck?!]_

 _McNamara: [wtf indeed]_

 _Fleming: [Halloween is next month! We need to advertise our attraction too!]_

 _Jenna's Rolan: [If you guys need help, send me a SOS]_

 _Veronica: [I've always wondered, why do you call yourself 'Jenna's Rolan'? I mean, I know who you are but I fail to see the link?]_

 _JakeyD: [cuz rolan sounds like rolling if u say it fast, so its like jennas rolling]_

 _Richislit: [which is even funnier cuz shes a fatty]_

 _McNamara: [DONT DISCRIMINATE AGAISNT FAT PPL BIATCH]_

 _Niel's Pruners: [So when am I supposed to plan out the speech for the broadcast advertising?]_

 _Fleming: [We'll cross that bridge later]_

 _Richislit: [u suk as the student council prezz]_

 _Fleming: [DO NOT TALK TO ME WHEN I'M HAVING A SLUSHIE]_

 _Richislit: [wtf how do we even kno ur getting high on some flavoured ice?]_

 _Richislit: [where the hell do u even get a slush when ur in sch?]_

 _Veronica: [Backstage, we rented one for the musical. She and JD abuse it freely.]_

 _McNamara: [yup jd abuses the normal machine tho]_

 _Richislit: [normal?]_

 _Jenna's Rolan: [Anyways, I'll help you three out if you need it! Just call me!]_

 _Niel's Pruners: [If Qing is online, she'll definitely make a BMC reference...]_

 _Fleming: [Speaking of references... I need to borrow some books to beef up my exam preparation...]_

 _Veronica: [Right... They're in November...]_

 _McNamara: [why cant we be like other schs n hv them in dec?]_

 _Veronica: [Because the school knows that you'll forget about them if they have it a week before Christmas.]_

 _McNamara: [urgggghh]_

"Well, I guess I should prepare for movie night at Martha's..." Veronica commented, slipping her phone back into her bag as she made her way out of the school building.

XXXXXX

 _[Dear Diary,_

 _Today I've asked Duke out on a date. Fuck. At least it was better than asking her about her mental health. Urgh, she said that she'll get back to me regarding the day but... I'm so nervous! Clothing is important right?! I don't even know where to go for a date! I really REALLY didn't plan this through! We're watching My Little Pony now, and all I can think of is how Duke should at least open up to Mac more cause they're like childhood buddies?! But a date with Duke... oh man I just can't stop smiling! I'm smiling like an idiot! It's worse than when Pauline sees a new slushie flavour... oh god, I can't believe I'm writing this in MY diary of all places..._

 _-Veronica]_

"Whatcha writing in your diary Ronnie?" JD asked, trying to sneak a peek into Veronica's diary. Veronica hastily slapped JD, stuffing the book back into her bag that she brought over to Martha's house. Martha and Pauline chuckled, their eyes briefly tearing away from the television screen. "Sheesh, no need to slap me that hard..."

"Diaries are a private thing you know!" Veronica shot back, her attention focused on a message appearing on her phone screen. _'It's Duke! It's most likely about the date...'_

 _Duke: [hey hey]_

 _Duke: [u free tmr?]_

 _Duke: [since u need to do some halloween poster shit right?]_

 _Veronica: [I take it that Mac has whined to you about it?]_

 _Duke: [ding ding u get a prize missy]_

 _Duke: [i know ur a high flyer, but u sure u wanna hang out with me?]_

 _Veronica: [Absolutely! Hanging out with you is one of the best things in my life!]_

"Oh shit, I shouldn't phrase it that way..." Veronica mumbled as she furiously typed away on her keypad, with JD and Pauline observing in amusement. "Shiiiit. Now she's going to think I'm creepy."

"The only thing that's creepy here is that we're watching 'My Little Pony' with the lights off." Pauline chuckled, holding up a can of cola. "Hey Dean, lend me your soda for a bit."

"Sure thing Fleming. What do you need it for anyways?"

"Halloween poster. It's the perfect size for a full moon." Pauline replied, placing the can onto a piece of blank paper and using a pencil to trace the circumference of the base. "Sawyer, how's your poster coming along?"

"I haven't even started! You think I can crank out ideas that fast?!" Veronica shot back, dismissing Pauline with a half-hearted wave of her left hand.

 _Duke: [i know ur the one who asked me out, but can we go to the mall tmr?]_

 _Duke: [i mean, if ur ok with tmr]_

 _Veronica: [Oh no, it's perfectly fine!]_

 _Veronica: [Just curious, why the mall specifically?]_

 _Duke: [welllll]_

 _Duke: [i wnt to get a game tht came out recently]_

 _Duke: [but i feel awkward going into a game store n buy it]_

 _Veronica: [I feel like I'm being used...]_

 _Veronica: [If it's for that, why not buy it online? Your game console is a PS Vita right?]_

 _Duke: [ok 1, my computers just got stolen]_

 _Duke: [made a report so dun worry bout tht]_

 _Duke: [2, i still dun get how to download stuff over to my console]_

 _Duke: [3, i actually hv a loyalty card that gives me 25% discount for the games if i buy at tht game store]_

 _Duke: [ofc, other game stores under tht company work too but the mall is the closest]_

 _Veronica: [Remind me again why you, a gamer who has a loyalty card, still feel awkward going into a game store?]_

 _Duke: [... i dun rlly like ppl looking at me so i usually wear a hoodie to cover my face...]_

 _Duke: [but we r hanging out tmr, so i cant do tht]_

 _Veronica: [I don't really mind if you do that though?]_

 _Veronica: [You look cute with your hood on.]_

 _Duke: [... pls just come with me]_

"Look Ronnie, when a girl is being pushy, it means she likes you so just fucking say yes already." JD commented, a teasing grin on his pale features. Veronica scowled, but followed his advice nonetheless.

 _Veronica: [I didn't say that I wouldn't follow you did I?]_

XXXXXX

"How is it going with the posters?" Heather (Duke) asked Veronica, who was on the floor busy sketching out some designs for a Halloween poster. It was a Saturday, and they were currently on a date. Well, it _seemed_ like a date when in reality Heather just wanted Veronica to accompany her to buy a new game at the nearby shopping mall. Whatever, Veronica was the one who invited Heather out so she can call it a date regardless what the latter thought. Veronica sighed, furiously erasing her most recent sketch. "I'll... take it that it's a disaster?"

"Disaster is probably a nicer way to put it. Try 'doomed'." Veronica grumbled, messing up her hair. "I'm not getting any ideas!"

"You could roam around the stores and see what they have done to prepare for Halloween?"

"I'll probably end up in Starbucks blowing all my money on some overpriced coffee! No thanks."

"Why don't you think about what the rest of the school is doing?" Heather suggested, playing with the hem of her signature green hoodie. At Veronica's insistence, she eventually went with her usual hoodie. She wore a black flannel blouse underneath, and decided to complement it with a pair of loose fitting jeans and black slip-on shoes. It was different from her usual athletic attire, but she wanted impress Veronica even if it was just a little. "Anyways, Mac was telling us that there's like only 16 of you guys for the haunted house. Not that I want a haunted house in the first place... but will you guys be alright?"

"That's exactly what Pauline is worried about. It's less than half of the number she wanted." Veronica sighed, tapping her pencil on the stone floor. "I'm not even too sure what are we going to do for the haunted house."

"That sounds worrying. I mean it." Heather responded, bending down and clasped Veronica's free hand. "How about you accompany me to buy the game? It can take you off your mind for at least three minutes."

"That's a pretty exact number." Veronica laughed, pushing herself up from the floor. "What game are you getting?"

"Oh it's 'Danganronpa V3'! It came out on 26 September!" Heather grinned, holding up a green key wallet. Veronica was surprised that even Heather's wallet was green, but what made her _truly_ surprised was...

"26 September?! Today is the 30th! The game came out _literally_ four days ago?!" Veronica asked, in disbelief that Heather was getting a game that came out recently. "There's going to be a hell lot of people there!"

"I know! Which is why I brought you along so that I won't feel bored waiting in line!"

"Are you _serious_?!"

"As serious as I'm a sucker for pudding!"

"... Are you? I mean, I know you like pudding but..."

"Yes! Now c'mon, let's get to the game store before the queue gets nasty!" Heather chirped, tugging on Veronica's hand and dragging her to said store.

XXXXXX

" _This_ is what you call a queue?!" Veronica asked, gasping at the sight of other patrons literally beating each other in the hopes of getting their hands on the game. Even if they did manage to get their hands on the packaging, it would most likely be stolen out of their hands by another. "It looks like a fucking _war-zone_!"

"It's uh... usually not this bad." Heather sheepishly replied, pushing her way through the crowd. Veronica gulped, and decided to follow her crush through the crowd even though she knew that she would definitely regret it later. "Besides, I'm here for the hardcopy I reserved. So there's no need for me to duke it out with them. Heh, 'duke' it out."

"Yes, I saw the pun. Don't leave me alone with these animals..." Veronica muttered, holding out her smartphone in order to snap a few shots of the scene unfurling in front of her. _'I'm so going to send this to Martha later.'_

"Okay okay, sheesh..." Heather went up to the counter, keeping a watchful eye on Veronica just like what the latter had requested. "Hi uh, I've reserved a copy of 'Danganronpa V3: Killing Harmony' under Heather Duke two days ago?"

"Yeah, got your game right here. Geez, what's with you guys and this game? All I know it's some killing game..." The staff at the counter sighed, handing Heather a copy of the said game. "Okay so the game costs 70 bucks and plus the ten percent reservation fee... That'll be 77 dollars."

"I... I can use this right?" Heather asked, holding up her loyalty card. The staff nodded, punching in a series of numbers into a conveniently placed calculator at the edge of the counter. "Oh thank god, I didn't bring much out to spend on games..."

"Okay new cost 57.75 dollars." Heather pulled out a few notes and some coins, handing it to the staff. "57.85 dollars, so your change will be a dime... Hold on, is this two dollar note real?"

"Just because it's not seen often doesn't mean that it's a counterfeit. Anyways, it's real. Or I hope it's real, because I have no idea who the fresh hell gave me that note anymore."

"Eh, it's just two dollars. I honestly doubt anyone in the right mind will actually fake a two dollar bill." The staff shrugged, placing the money tendered into the cash register. "You might wanna get back to your girlfriend, she's getting herself eaten alive here."

"What girlfriend? If you mean Veronica then she's just a..." Heather turned around, only to see Veronica's outstretched hand emerging from the crowd. The woman soon tumbled out afterwards, her hair and clothes were in a frightful mess. "... friend? Oh god, I'm so sorry! I should have kept a better eye on you!"

"No it's fine, let's just get out of here." Veronica said, twirling her pencil. Heather nodded, and immediately led Veronica out of the store. "Okay so now that you got your game... we're done right?"

"Veronica, if this is your idea of spending time together, then you really need to step up your game." Veronica blinked, almost forgetting that it was _her_ idea to go on a date. "... You forgot that it's your idea to be here on a weekend didn't you."

"In my defence, our conversation last night wired my brain to think that you're the one asking me out on a date."

"My bad. But still, I don't really want to end our time together on such an early note." Heather pouted, something that made Veronica blush slightly. Veronica wondered if Heather knew what to do in order to have her way with her, or it was just a coincidence that she was making a face that made Veronica vulnerable to whatever requests. "I mean, I don't care what you wanna do. We can go to a library and look up ways to make a killer haunted house poster, or watch a horror flick at the cinema! Just... just don't leave me?"

"Heather..." Veronica started, but something was constantly nagging her. Why was Heather being so pushy today? It seemed like she was desperate to spend time with Veronica, something which wasn't completely expected. _'Is Duke always this clingy though? She was pretty okay when we first met... and the other two Heathers didn't say anything about her having a clingy side... or is this considered a desperate side?'_

"O-Oh sorry. I sound so desperate right now... this is so embarrassing..." Heather sadly smiled, averting her eyes away from Veronica. This wasn't gone unnoticed by Veronica, which made her feel a tinge of guilt for thinking that she was clingy.

"... Let's go catch a movie then. No point worrying over some dumb sketch now, might as well continue it at home. Besides, I shouldn't be doing something else during our date." Veronica replied, placing her pencil back into her pencil case and stuffing it into her bag along with the slightly crumpled piece of paper that was full of pencil marks. "I'm not in the mood for horror though."

"Doesn't matter! Let's go!" Heather's mood went back to her usual cheery self, which disturbed Veronica slightly but decided that it was nothing important. What mattered to her most was having a successful date with the person she liked. Veronica sighed in mock defeat, allowing herself to be dragged off to the cinema.

XXXXXX

"You know, what kind of a shitty window lock does JD have that Ronnie can snap it off so easily?" JD asked Pauline, Heather (McNamara) and a relatively short woman with slight freckles and almost black hair. That woman was Christine Canigula, otherwise known as 'CC' in messaging apps. The four of them were at Pauline's house, with JD and Christine offering to help the other two women with the haunted house posters.

"A lock meant for people to break in and have sex!" Christine replied, laughing along with JD while Pauline shot her an annoyed look. "Sorry, couldn't resist pointing that out! Anyways, where's Veronica?"

"On a date with Duke. Can't believe she actually has the balls to ask her out on a date." Heather commented, twirling her pencil as she tried to think of a poster for the haunted house. "Apparently she doesn't lack the balls, no wonder she doesn't play with dolls anymore."

"Her mom still fixes her lunch for her though." Pauline replied, the pencil in her dominant hand furiously moving across the paper. "Wonder how's her date..."

"Anyways, you guys are going with the serial killer trope right? Why not include that into the poster?" JD asked, scrolling through Pauline's phone to access the Halloween committee in charge of the haunted house. "You know, you guys need to finalise the details before doing anything..."

"I was thinking... why not make it like a locked room escape thing? We can come up with some puzzles and stick 'em in some of the rooms if they want to escape the level!" Christine suggested, which was met with Pauline groaning. "That bad?"

"Bad for me, yes. As the student council president, I have to deal with the clubs' activities for Halloween too. Making the haunted house more complicated is making my life even more miserable." Pauline replied, stopping her sketch. "Also, what you just suggested doesn't link up with what we have originally planned to do Canigula."

"We can probably save that for a personal party kind of event. Right now, we have to fucking ensure that anyone who visits us doesn't actually get lost in there." Heather quipped in, crushing her paper into a ball and tossing it at a nearby dustbin. "And maybe make it _actually_ entertaining."

"I'm wondering... how the fuck is having a serial killer related to a haunted house?" JD asked, grimacing at some of the messages in the haunted house messaging group. "You guys have terrible planning skills."

"Shut up Dean. I've never been to a haunted house."

"Meh, the haunted houses I've been to are tame."

"I'm banned from entering one." Three pair of eyes turned to look at Heather, with two of them not the least bit surprised that she was banned from haunted houses. "... I've injured a few people in there..."

"We figured that was the case. Anyways, you gotta plan out how the route works before actually coming up with a poster." JD advised, shaking his head. Frankly speaking, he didn't expect the student council to run a haunted house considering the number of other activities they had to oversee on Halloween itself. The three women groaned, with Pauline extending her hand out. "Oh right, your phone. Here ya go Fleming."

"Thanks. I can't believe that we fucked up before we did anything..." Pauline mumbled, her fingers typing away on the keypad.

 _Fleming: [Everyone will gather at Ms Wellins's house tomorrow to discuss the haunted house]_

 _Fleming: [We've been doing it all wrong]_

 _Fleming: [We need to plan out the route on the fourth level before we can do anything]_

 _QH: [Hold on, did you even ask Sharon?]_

 _QH: [And why her place?]_

 _McNamara: [cuz her hse is creepy]_

 _CC: [Anyways, we really need everyone at a specific place to discuss the actual thing!]_

 _Valentine: [wow srsly]_

 _Valentine: [what if we hv plans?]_

 _Fleming: [Cancel it before I cancel it for you]_

 _Jerry's Heere: [u do rmb tht ur just a sophomore right?]_

 _Fleming: [DO I LOOK I CARE?!]_

 _Slushieboi: [if we r gonna plan, shldnt we get a plan of lvl4 first?]_

 _DLJ: [we hv tht]_

 _DLJ: [ok so qing will ask sharon and we show up outside her hse at 8am]_

 _Veronica: [What the fuck you mean I spent 30 minutes on a poster that's no longer due tomorrow?!]_

 _Richislit: [its just 30 mins]_

 _Veronica: [I'm on a DATE with the girl I like!]_

 _Veronica: [Pauline, I hate you so damn much.]_

 _Fleming: [Sorry]_

 _Fleming: [In this rate, we might really need to rope in more people]_

 _DLJ: [finally someone with common sense]_

 _McNamara: [i can get chandler to blackmail mr allen to help]_

 _McNamara: [the other three shld be pretty willing]_

 _CC: [Should I be disturbed that the seniors have blackmail material of teachers?!]_

 _QH: [Honestly, no]_

 _QH: [Anyways Sharon gave us the green light so yeah 8 am outside her place]_

 _QH: [You might wanna add the rest who you're planning to rope in later]_

 _Fleming: [I already have a good idea who else to rope in]_

 _Veronica: [Whoever you get, don't get Duke.]_

 _McNamara: [ya like we joined bcuz we wanna scare the living light outta her]_

 _Fleming: [Wow you two are jerks, I feel sorry for Duke now]_

 _Jerry's Heere: [keep in mind tht ur a jerk too]_

 _Jerry's Heere: [a rude jerk tbh]_

 _Veronica: [Big mistake Jeremy...]_

 _McNamara: [ya ur stupid to piss her off]_

 _Valentine: [whatev im not going tmr idc what u do to me]_

"So now that we don't have to do a poster, what should we do?" Heather asked, throwing up her pencil into the air. JD and Christine shrugged, turning to Pauline for her thoughts. Pauline looked up from her phone and at them, a scowl on her face.

"I don't know what you three want to do, but I want you all out of my house _now_. Fucking waste of a Saturday..."

XXXXXX

"What's wrong? More work for Halloween?" Heather (Duke) asked Veronica, who was furiously typing away on her phone. They had finished watching a movie, based off LEGO toys. Veronica silently nodded, her attention concentrated solely on her phone until a few minutes later when she promptly hurled the device to the ground. "Jesus Christ!"

"Fucking great, I don't have to do the poster because apparently, we didn't plan out the route." Veronica groaned, turning to Heather right after she went over to pick up her cracked smartphone. "Well, at least now our date is actually a date."

"I've been wondering... you've been calling this a date, does that mean you like me?" Heather asked, a hesitant smile on her face. Veronica thought for a moment, then realised that she had never once told Heather that she liked her. All she had told Heather was that she didn't know what girls did she like, never once confessing that she liked Heather.

"... I guess? I mean, if you're always on my mind it counts right?" Veronica replied, thoroughly aware that Heather was now aware of her crush. Heather nodded seriously, considering Veronica's response. Veronica gulped, recalling that while Heather had admitted that Veronica was her type, she didn't say whether she truly liked her or she was simply a mere representation of her romantic preference. _'Actually, will dating her give me the future right to inquire about her mental health? Okay no, bad Veronica. That's a really shitty thing to do even for you.'_

"Look, you're a great person. Really. You're kind, considerate of everyone and reliable. You can have any girl you want... but just not me." Heather eventually said, turning away from Veronica. "I hope we can still be friends even after this."

"... I wasn't really going to bring this up... but I know you like me too. Mac said that you've been checking me out since freshman year." Veronica replied, successfully making Heather look back at her. Her face was one of shock and... fear? Veronica wondered why was there fear on Heather's face, but reasoned that she could ask her later. "Why don't you want to be in a relationship? I'm asking you because while Mac has told me the reason why, I would rather hear it from your mouth directly."

"It's... complicated. That's all I can really say at this point."

"More complicated than your depression?" As soon as those words left Veronica's mouth, she knew that she had made a mistake. Heather was now visibly stunned at Veronica's knowledge of her depression, and was opening and closing her mouth like a dying fish. _'Shit. But it's not my fault that she's sending mixed signals! She was clingy with me one movie ago! I have the right to rip the fucking plaster right?'_

"You... I... Let's sit down somewhere and order some drinks, I can tell that this is going to be real painful for me." Heather sighed, beckoning Veronica to a cafe nearby. Veronica complied, following her without any protest. _'Curse Veronica and Mac for their super accurate hypothesis...'_

XXXXXX

Hey Slushie Addict here! Okay so, apparently this chapter didn't mention much of exercising. And looks like the plans for the haunted house is starting to fall apart thanks to JD. Speaking of haunted houses, anyone knows how to plan one that includes a serial killer? I could really use some ideas at this point, I have almost zero experience with these stuff. It'll be great if someone can suggest an idea or two that can be done by a maximum of 20 people. Anyways, thanks for reading and if no ideas come up, I'll just smoke my way through in the Halloween chapter!


	10. Chapter 10

Hey Slushie Addict here! So uh, I'm kinda screwed for the Halloween chapter. Yeah, which means that it'll feature a whole lot of errors and shitty planning. On the bright side for you guys, that chapter won't be coming any time soon! Hopefully. Anyways, I don't own Heathers!

XXXXXX

"So... why are we all at Rammy boy's house again?" JD asked, scanning the living room for Veronica. "Where's Ronnie?"

"S-She's over at Ms Wellin's house to discuss about the Halloween event she's in..." Heather (Chandler) replied, and while it wasn't obvious to those who were present at Ram's house, Heather (Duke) had an uncomfortable look on her face when Veronica's name was mentioned. "McNamara is with her... I think."

"Okay, one question answered. Great, now what about my first question?"

"C'mon man, we haven't been practicing for quite a while. Since V and Mac aren't here, we just have to cover the songs that don't require 'em. After that, we'll be sure to wow Allen-man!" Ram explained, motioning for Kurt to switch on a laptop. "Seriously dudes, this may sound super weird from me, but we really have to get our game together."

"... Yeah, I know it sounds weird coming from him. He kinda has a point though." Kurt shrugged, his face not bearing a single trace of surprise that everyone in the room apart from Martha and Ram himself shared. "So... are we gonna go with JD's solo, Chandler's solo or Duke's solo?"

"I-I have a solo?" Heather (Chandler) asked, this was the first time she had heard that she had a solo. Unless he was referring to 'Me Inside Of Me', which wasn't an actual solo since Veronica and the background characters had a major singing role in that particular song. "Which song?"

"Actually, can 'Me Inside Of Me' be even considered as her solo?" Martha asked Kurt and Ram, who took a moment to think and sigh. "I'll take it as a no then?"

"Alright! JD, pay up!" Heather (Duke) exclaimed, stuffing her hand into JD's hoodie and pulling out wads of cash. "Told you that song isn't Chandler's solo!"

"You two were _betting_ on whether that song is a solo or not?! What the fire truck you guys?!" Martha asked, her substitute word for swearing making the two betters laugh uncontrollably. "Oh come on guys, it's not funny!"

"Right right, what the fire truck is wrong with us right?" JD said, laughing hard as he tried his very best to keep a straight face. Heather had an easier time maintaining a poker face, though it took her 15 minutes for her to build it up. "Okay okay, fine. Hey Kurt! Have you two uggos decided which solo to impress Allen?"

"Let's just go in order then. Duke, sing your solo. After that will be JD, and we should be good." Ram suggested, with Heather (Chandler) tapping on his shoulder. "Yeah?"

"W-What about Martha's song?" Ram took a while to process the question, and finally after what seemed to be awhile, he let out a loud 'fuck' followed by an apology for forgetting his girlfriend's solo.

"FUCK! I FUCKING FORGOT ABOUT 'KINDERGARTEN BOYFRIEND' I'M SUCH A SHITTY BOYFRIEND!"

XXXXXX

"Okay guys, we need ideas for the haunted house and fast. It's already fucking October and I can't believe we all suck at planning." Pauline declared, slamming her fists onto Ms Wellins's oak table. The rest of the students and teachers nodded silently, all of them knew they were fucked but the problem was that they didn't know _how_ to rectify their situation. "I'm starting to think that the principal is trying to screw us all over."

"Ditto. And like, can we get some slushies? I think better when I have a brain freeze." Michael asked, raising his hand to get Pauline's attention. Pauline shot him one glare and it was enough to make him cower back into his seat. "Oh, 'kay then..."

"Should we just scrap the offering event? I mean, I know how much of a tradition it is but y'know..." Heather (McNamara) suggested, which surprised both Veronica and Pauline. "... Look I know I joined because of that event but fuck it if it means screwing us over at a creepy teacher's house with a bloody basement. Besides, I still have my main aim of scaring the fucking shit outta Duke."

"Um... some houses do have a basement?" A tall, scrawny man raised his hand, a confused expression on his face. "I mean, my house has a basement too."

"No Jeremy, what Mac meant is that Ms Wellins's basement is _actually_ covered in blood. Straight out of a horror scene and by the way, don't try to pick the lock unless you want to get frightened." Veronica replied, looking away from said teacher after implying that she picked the lock to her basement. "Anyways, what about the teachers? Surely you guys have something."

"All we have is the floor plan, not the ideas." Ms Qing replied, throwing a stack of papers on to the table. This was already starting to become a mess, and it wasn't even 15 minutes yet. "Can't we take a break?"

"If we do that, we're probably going to take a break for the whole day." Christine sighed, she was really looking forward to the haunted house and she knew that Pauline was doing her best to keep things floating but she was starting to lose confidence. One of the few thoughts that kept her running was that the three students involved in the school play was juggling their time just to make the school happy, and it killed her to think that she wanted to give up when there were others shouldering extra burden. "... Actually, I have an idea!"

"Well don't keep us waiting Canigula, spit it out already!" At this point, Pauline was willing to snap up _any_ ideas no matter how shitty they were. _'I need a slushie._ _'_

"Okay so there's this famous haunted hospital attraction in Japan, and it's like a freakin' maze in that building. What if we go with that logic and set up dummy walls to make it seem like a labyrinth to those who visit us? It'll look something more like a haunted house, right?"

"Alright, any objections? That's not an actual question by the way, I expect everyone to agree or else they'll have themselves humiliated on national TV." Pauline threatened, she _really_ wanted to go on a slushie run soon. Hell, she was even willing to bring Michael along. No one said anything, aware that Pauline (and both Veronica and Heather) had the means to blackmail them. After a few seconds had passed, Pauline clapped her hands in relief for settling one of their many problems. "Great, we'll go with Canigula's idea! Now we'll take a 30 minutes break before we start fleshing out the idea."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Veronica asked, fully expecting Pauline to simply walk out of the house and come back with a slushie. That was exactly what the latter did, with Michael chasing after her. "Hey Mac, can we talk in private?"

"Sure, not like the rest are actually eavesdropping on us." Heather shrugged, motioning to where the rest were. The teachers were... having an argument about the best fries while Jenna, Rich and Jake were discussing about how 'fake' Trump's hair was. Christine waved when Veronica glanced in her direction, Jeremy was busy on his Nintendo 3DS and Brooke was sleeping on Chloe's shoulder. Veronica nodded, wondering if they were able to pull the event off successfully. "Anyways, what is it?"

"... Has Duke said anything hinting about her mental state to you?"

"Not really, just that she was super anxious when she came back yesterday. I've been meaning to ask, what the hell happened on your date with her?" Veronica gulped audibly upon the mention of the word 'date', which told Heather what she needed to know. "... You broke her heart didn't you?" Okay, obviously Heather sucked big time at picking up subtle messages.

"What?! No! I mean... yesterday could have gone differently but at least got some answers?" Veronica shifted her eyes to Chloe's black eye, which was given to her by Pauline after the former refused to attend today's meeting. Heather wasn't convinced, and Veronica feared that she was about to have a first hand experience on how good Heather's right hooks were. "Look, what she told me is definitely private. Just because we're in it together, doesn't mean that I'll be breaking my trust to her anytime soon."

"At least you're still behaving normally. Does that mean you two are dating?" Veronica shook her head, while she was a few steps closer to Heather (Duke), they were unfortunately not together. "Fuck, I'm gonna be rich soon."

"What do you mean?"

"Hey CC Lemon!" Heather (McNamara) yelled, getting Christine's attention. "You owe me 50 bucks!"

"Are you kidding me?! You made a bet with Christine _and_ bet that we're not dating?!" Veronica groaned, maybe things would be a lot easier if her group of friends had the personalities of their musical counterparts. At least Martha wouldn't change while JD could be her psycho boyfriend, they did date after all. "How does 50 dollars make you rich anyways?"

"Well... Since Christine is not the only one who bet that you two are dating, I win everything?"

"Yeah, and just how many people participated in this bet of yours?" Veronica asked, with almost everyone in the room pulling out green bills from their wallets. "Oh come on, even the teachers?!"

"Not all of 'em. Like, Ms Shears wasn't in the loop about it while Mr Woody refused to have any part in it due to his gambling addiction. Anyways, 18 people lost to me so that makes..." Heather tried to do mental calculations in her head but gave up shortly afterwards. "Hey Veronica, what's 18 times 50?"

"900?! You made 900 dollars?! How are you going to pay them if we were really together?!" Veronica was yelling at Heather, but her words was also directed at the rest who participated in the bet. "Heather, don't you see the huge risk?!"

"Veronica, lemme tell you something. I only take calculated risks." Heather smiled charmingly, dismissing Veronica's worry. This was also the moment that the door opened with a loud slam, with Pauline entering the room with a scowl on her face. "Hey Pauline, pay up. Veronica isn't dating Duke."

"Fuck! First the slushie machine nearby broke down, then I lost Mells, and now you're telling me that I lost a bet?! What kind of shitty day is this?!" Pauline started to rant about her bad luck, ignoring the incredulous looks on most of the event planners' faces when they heard that Michael was missing. "Fuck! You guys better not fuck today up anymore!"

XXXXXX

"Okay Duke, remember. Don't eye-fuck Mac during your solo no matter how hot she is." Ram warned as he prepared the music for 'Shine A Light Reprise', with JD snickering at the comment. "At least it's not V. With you two dating, it's gonna be harder."

"Veronica? What does she have to do with it?" Heather (Duke) asked, blissfully unaware of the bet they made. She was, however, uncomfortable with Ram's assumption that she was in a relationship with Veronica no matter how much they got along. Heather had made it clear to Veronica yesterday that dating was out of the question, but had also admitted that she was interested in the latter. "Ram, is the music ready?"

"Wait one sec. Thank god V isn't here, if not when we do our rerun on 'Candy Store', you'll be kissing her during your mini-solo." Ram chuckled, hitting a button that started the music. "Okay JD, get ready!"

 _"Stupid child-proof caps!"_ JD wondered why was he saying Heather (McNamara)'s lines in a falsetto, they had Heather fucking Chandler there for fuck's sake. Given that the rest were snickering at him, including Heather (Chandler), it was clear that they chose him for laughs. Thank god, he was saved by a push to the ground by Heather (Duke). "Oof!"

 _Oh look, Heather's going to whine, whine, whine all night!_

 _You don't deserve to live._

 _Why not kill yourself?_

 _Here, have a sedative!_

 _Whine, whine, whine like there's no Santa Claus!_

 _You're pathetic because you whine... you whine all night!_

 _Your ass is off the team, go on and bitch and moan!_

 _You don't deserve the dream, you're going to die alone!_

 _Die alone!_

 _Die alone!_

 _Die alone!_

 _Die alone!_

"Great! At least we don't have to worry about Duke!" Kurt cheerfully commented before he noticed the tears forming at Heather's eyes. "Duke, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"I-I got something in my eye at the sedative part..." Heather brushed her tears away, wincing as she brushed past her left eye. The rest nodded, the way Heather reacted to Kurt was casual and not one filled with emotion. "Hey Ram, mind if I use your bathroom? I think that something's actually an eyelash."

"This is why I don't understand why girls like to extend 'em." Ram muttered, earning himself a glare from Heather. "Okay okay, you know where it is."

"Thanks Ram. And thank _you_ JD for embarrassing yourself while filling in for Mac." JD scowled, earning a playful grin from Heather as she disappeared up the stairs in order to access the bathroom. Once in the privacy of the bathroom however, Heather allowed herself to cry, though she did her best to control any sound made while she was crying. "Stupid song. Stupid musical me. I hate myself."

"D-Duke? Are you alright?" Heather groaned, of all times she had to be heard... "I-I know I failed my class in Social Skills, but I don't think you sound okay."

"No, I'm fine. I'm just trying to get this fucking eyelash out." Heather replied, hoping that the girl behind the door left her alone. At first, the silence was an indicator to her that she left the scene, but after a while, she realised that the silence meant a lack of footsteps which meant that the girl was still there. "Chandler, really, I'm fine."

"That's what they say in movies before they jump off a bridge." Heather groaned, her friend's choice in movies were scarily alarming. "... I know you don't wish to talk about it, but you should really talk about it. D-Did that make sense?"

"Yes it did, and no I'm not going to follow through that." Heather scoffed, if everyone followed good advice, there would be no such thing as mistakes in the damn dictionary. Like her, she was a fucking mistake in a shitty world. "You can go back you know, I just need to get the eyelash out of my eye."

"... No. I refuse to let you suffer alone. You signed me up for this because you think that I needed more confidence, now I'm going to be here because I think you need someone right now."

"Chandler, what I really need right now is time to cry by myself."

XXXXXX

"Okay... So if we use these seven rooms, we could make it long enough without the school actually finding out that we're too lazy to make it bigger." Pauline circled seven rooms on the map layout that the teachers brought. The rest nodded, trying their best to understand Pauline's instructions. They've decided to go with a monster theme, featuring creatures commonly seen during Halloween. Now all they had to do was to plan out the exact route participants would have to take once they enter the 'haunted house'. "Now, how should we board up the rooms for the route?"

"Well... with boards?" Heather (McNamara) suggested, clearly in no mood to contribute to the conversation. Pauline sighed, she wondered why did the principal want to conduct the damn haunted house every year. It was not only a waste of time but also a waste of time and resources.

"Didn't you mention something about curtains?" Veronica asked, yawning as she started to type out a message on her phone. "Man, this is gonna be one hell of a mess."

"Or hell on wheels, if you three get what I mean." Christine winked, receiving nothing but silence. "Oh c'mon Veronica, don't you have to sing that line in the first song?!"

"I do, but this is clearly not the time to be cracking jokes." Veronica replied, now engrossed with her texting. She wondered why were they still discussing about the haunted house when most of them were out of it. Hell, only Mr Woody and Christine were actually focused on the task at hand. "Anyways, why hasn't Chloe and Brooke come back yet? How long has it been since they left to find Michael?"

"When did they ever leave? Jeremy's the one who left to find Michael." Ms Qing pointed out, scanning the room for the mentioned girls. "Maybe they're making out in some room?"

"Teenagers..." Ms Wellins muttered, shaking her head at the mere thought of two girls defiling one of her rooms. Pauline rolled her eyes, she gathered the committee members to discuss how to go about Halloween, not to make out with each other.

"Fuck 'em, anyway Veronica has a point with the curtains, so let's go with that. As for how are we going to put them up, I'll leave that to Ms Qing."

"Hold up, why me?!"

"Because you can't teach Chemistry without the use of the labs, which are all located at Level 4."

"Well fuck me gently with a chainsaw, that doesn't mean I have nothing else to do."

"You know, I do have a chainsaw in my basement. I mean, it's probably going to hurt you a hell lot, but anything to fulfil your kinky side." Ms Wellins shrugged, earning herself looks from Ms Qing, Pauline, Mr Woody and Veronica. "What?! _She's_ the one who said it!"

"It's a fucking expression. Anyways, so we're going with the usual Halloween monster theme. Who's going to act and who's going to usher those brats into our sad imitation of a haunted house?" Ms Qing asked, suddenly interested with the plan. Paulien shrugged, she hadn't thought that far and if she was going to be honest, she wasn't in the mood to do so. "Woody, you got any ideas?"

"I want to be Frankenstein's monster. I think I have enough height to pull it off." Woody mumbled, a sheepish smile forming across his chiselled face as his dark eyes darted across the room, as though he was waiting for his idea to get shot down.

"Ooh, I wanna do make-up!" Brooke sauntered into the living room with Chloe following behind as though she didn't went missing for a period of time. "Mr Woody, you're so gonna be a rad Franken-dude!"

"R-Really?" Mr Woody's eyes lit up, from which Veronica gathered that he wasn't used to getting his way. Veronica eyed the people in the living room, trying to guess who would want to scare people and who didn't. As for herself, she would prefer if she didn't have to participate. That way, she could invite (force) Heather (Duke) to the haunted house.

"Ooh! I call dibs on the mummy!" Rich's hand shot up eagerly, while Jake chuckled at his eagerness. "Jakey here wants the vampire part!"

"I'm gonna go with the zombie!" Michael yelled as he stormed into the house, obviously displeased that Pauline lost him a while back. Jeremy followed behind him, remaining silent while Michael ranted. "What the fuck dude, how did you lose me at a stupid junction?!"

"Shut up, my only thought at that time was to get a slushie." Pauline grumbled, writing down the names of those who want to participate in scaring people. "Okay, Mr Woody's a Frankenstein monster, Goranski's a mummy, Dillinger's a vampire, Mells and Heere are zombies... and Ms Qing's a Chinese zombie."

"Wait, what?!" Both Ms Qing and Jeremy asked in disbelief, they were both positive that they didn't sign up for it.

"Yeah, and Ms Wellins can be a serial killer."

"Can I say no?" Ms Wellins asked, looking visibly uncomfortable at that idea. Pauline wanted to say no, but her eyes rested on Ms Shears, eventually resulting in nodding in approval. "Oh thank g-"

"Okay, Ms Shears can take Ms Wellins's place."

"W-W-What?!" It was the first time Ms Shears has spoken, and honestly, some of them wished that she remained silent throughout the day. "I-I-I don't w-w-want to be a s-s-serial killer!"

"Well, I want someone who looks innocent to play that role. I mean, do you honestly believe that Canigula's a good candidate?" All eyes fell on Christine, who was looking back at them with puppy eyes. "No Canigula, you're a terrible candidate."

"But I was the one who suggested this whole thing..."

XXXXXX

"Why would Westerburg be like Vietnam?" JD asked after numerous failed singing sessions. JD was the only one who couldn't get the hang of his solo no matter how hard he tried to memorise the lyrics, and if Pauline were with them, she would most probably kick him for not being able to sing his own solo. "Like, Vietnam's all agricultural and stuff right?"

"Oh my god, don't you know what happened in the Vietnam War?!" Heather (Duke) groaned, chucking Ram's world history textbook at JD. "You know what? If you can't fucking sing, then I'll do it."

"Don't tell me I have to pretend to be Veronica! I've already done a Mac for your stupid solo!"

"Unless you wanna hang yourself, no you don't." Heather rolled her eyes, with JD sticking out his tongue in protest. "Ram! Start the music!"

"If only Duke's a psycho, then this song would be lit as fuck." Ram muttered under his breath as he fiddled with the computer. Kurt chuckled while Martha lightly swatted her boyfriend.

"We already have a psychopath and her name's Heather McNamara." JD replied, scooting away from Heather (Chandler). "Please don't kill me for dissing your girlfriend."

"A-Actually, I was about to say that she has anger issues, but okay." Heather (Chandler) replied, a tired smile gracing her bony face. After prying out _some_ information from her friend, she had learnt that Heather (Duke) was fucked up in more ways than one. None of which includes actual fucking.

"Okay! Get ready!" Ram shouted, with the music to 'Meant To Be Yours' starting. Heather (Duke) took a deep breath, and faced JD who was cowering behind Heather (Chandler) for some unknown reason. No matter, JD made a good Veronica.

 _"All is forgiven baby! C'mon, get dressed! You're my date to the pep rally tonight!"_ Heather (Duke) declared, opting for a loving tone to potray JD's initital calm facade.

 _You chucked me out like I was trash, for that you should be dead-_

 _But, but, but!_

 _Then it hit me like a flash, what if high school went away instead?_

 _Those assholes are the key!_

 _They're keeping you away from me!_

 _They made you blind, messed up your mind, but I can set you free!_

 _You left me, and I feel apart, I punched the wall and cried-_

 _Bam! Bam! Bam!_

 _Then I found you changed my heart, and set loose all that truthful shit inside!_

 _And so I've built a bomb, tonight our school is Vietnam!_

 _Let's guarantee they'll never see their senior prom!_

 _I was meant to be yours..._

 _We were meant to be one..._

 _Don't give up on me now..._

 _Finish what've begun..._

 _I was meant to be yours..._

 _So when the high school gym goes BOOM! With everyone inside-_

 _Pchw! Pchw! Pchw!_

 _In the rubble of their tomb, we'll plant this note explaining why they died!_

 _"We, the students of Westerburg High, will die. Our burnt bodies may finally get through you. Your society churns out slaves and blanks, no thanks. Signed, the students of Westerburg High. Goodbye."_ If the rest didn't know Heather, they would have thought that she was seriously deranged. Heather (Chandler) was starting to worry that due to her personal issues, Heather (Duke) was considering a suicide pact with Veronica. Not that either of them would seriously go through it, but the worry was still there.

 _We'll watch the smoke pour out of the doors!_

 _Bring marshmallows, we'll make smores!_

 _We can smile and cuddle while the fire roars!_

 _I was meant to be yours!_

 _We were meant to be one!_

 _I can't make it alone!_

 _Finish what we've begun!_

 _You were meant to be mine!_

 _I am all that you need!_

 _You carved open my heart, can't just leave me to bleed!_

 _"Veronica! Open the- open the door please? Veronica, open the door."_ Heather had now changed to a pleading tone, to highlight JD's willingness to talk things through. She hoped that JD was paying attention, because if he wasn't, she'll make his life like Vietnam in the 70s. _"Veronica, can we not fight anymore please? Can we not fight anymore? Veronica, sure you've been scared, I've been there. I can set you free! Veronica, don't make me come in there! I'm gonna count to three! One! Two- fuck it!"_

 _Ah..._

 _Oh my god... no... Veronica..._

 _Please... don't... leave me alone..._

 _You... were... all I could trust..._

 _I... can't... do this alone..._

 _STILL I WILL IF I MUST!_

"And cue Veronica's mom coming in and have a screaming fit." Heather said, ending the song. Her friends all clapped, especially JD. "JD, you've better not fuck up this song. I swear, if we have to go through this song _one_ more time, I'll personally unleash hell on you."

"Go fuck youself."

"I'm already fucked up enough, thank you very much. Oh, that's a hella good rhyme."

"Since when do you use 'hella'?!" Kurt gaped, not used to hearing such words from Heather.

"Oh, ever since I got fucking invested in 'Life Is Strange'. Is it weird that I want to push Kate off the roof every fucking time I have to tell her some stupid Bible quote?"

"Man, I'm surprised you haven't punched Ms Religion just for having that surname." Ram muttered, making a note to _never_ play the game Heather had mentioned.

"I know right?!"

XXXXXX

"Hey Chloe, go fuck your selfie." Veronica mumbled, barely keeping her eyes open. It was close to 9 pm, and they were scrambling about with their first (and final) draft for Halloween. Well, almost everyone. Chloe was one of the few who weren't doing anything productive, and she was idly taking selfies with her phone.

"Wow, who pissed in your Cheerios?" Chloe replied, not stopping her selfies. Veronica sighed, she needed a long nap after what they had discussed. Then again, hammering out solid points was pretty productive.

"Nobody, and I don't eat Cheerios."

"You serious? That's like, awesome sauce."

"Are you cereal?"

"Can you two shut the fuck up?! Sawyer, you might want to stop hanging out with Duke." Pauline groaned, slamming her fists on to the table. "Geez, stop playing 'Life Is Strange' with her will you?"

"Wow, are you tripping on something?" Mr Derry asked, stretching his arms. He had been sleeping, until Pauline woke him up.

"She's tripping on life!" Christine chimed in, earning herself a glare from her junior. "What? You set yourself up for it!"

"Canigula, I swear to god..." Pauline gritted her teeth, she was having a bad day and the only thing stopping her from raging at the rest was because she wanted to... actually, she had no reason not to yell at them. "You know what? Fuck it. You guys aren't fucking serious! Like hello?! Even McNamara's doing something stupidly productive!"

"Just what's your impression of me?!" Heather (McNamara) asked, outraged that people assumed that she was never productive. After all, she was productive... just maybe in the wrong fields. "I'm pretty productive!"

"Productive in being such a rebel that is."

"Are we done here?" Ms Wellins asked, pinching her nose bridge in an attempt to rein in her irritation. "Because if we're done discussing about the committee's plans for Halloween, I would appreciate if all of you get the fuck out of my house. There's school tomorrow and I don't want to oversleep again."

"Wow, rude much?" Ms Qing laughed, standing up from her colleague's (very) comfy sofa. "But yeah, I'm gonna go back. Hey Ollie, you mind giving me a lift back?"

"If by giving you a lift back you mean hotwiring someone's car so that I can drive it, then sure. You need to find me a car first though." Mr Oliver shrugged, going back to texting on his phone. "Larry's like, flipping his shit."

"What did he do now?"

"Oh same old, Allen just blackmailed him into attending tomorrow's drama session with the students. That, and I have to mark a certain someone's Maths paper." Mr Allen replied, levelling a steady gaze on Heather. Ms Qing nodded, it was a relatively well-known fact that Heather was terrible at Maths. "What's that phrase again? Fuck me gently with a chainsaw?"

"No no, it's 'daddy fuck me harder'." Heather giggled, having her own online conversation with someone on her phone. "Hey Veronica, you wanna sleep over at Duke's place? She says that after the hell she went through at Ram's house, she could use some company."

"Did she actually say that I'm welcome, or is it another one of your plans to score some extra pocket money?" Veronica questioned, not believing for a second that Heather (Duke) wanted her over after somewhat pushing her away yesterday. Heather (McNamara) simply tossed her phone to Veronica, who barely caught it. The phone contained the owner's conversation with Heather (Duke), which served as proof that Veronica was indeed welcome.

 _Duke: [goddamn it mcbk]_

 _McNamara: [wtf happened]_

 _Duke: [try getting tgt for practice at ram's]_

 _Duke: [hella tiring]_

 _McNamara: [u try thinking how to do the fucking haunted hse]_

 _McNamara: [pauline was so close to blowing a gasket]_

 _Duke: [im surprised u know wht gasket means]_

 _McNamara: [fuck u im gd at lit n u kno it]_

 _Duke: [sure sure]_

 _Duke: [come over to my place, chandler could use some company from her gf]_

 _McNamara: [no need to invite me i can do tht myself]_

 _Duke: [bring veronica over]_

 _Duke: [the more the merrier]_

 _McNamara: [k thts the least i can do since u helped me get 900 bucks]_

 _Duke: [wait what]_

 _McNamara: [i bet against alsmot everyone we kno tht u two r not dating]_

 _McNamara: [im so glad ur so fucked up]_

 _McNamara: [i mean i dun kno if ur rfeally fucked up but im guessing thts the case]_

 _Duke: [wow gd job u ass]_

 _Duke: [srsly pls bring veronica over]_

 _Duke: [we can bitch abt u and chandler making out]_

 _McNamara: [pls tell me again why did i get 900 bucks today]_

 _Duke: [because ur hv gd foresight]_

 _Duke: [see u ltr]_

"Yeah sooooo... wanna sleepover and maybe make out with Duke?" Heather (McNamara) asked, her eyebrows jumping suggestively. Veronica rolled her eyes, promptly leaving Ms Wellins's house for Heather (Duke)'s. "H-Hey wait!"

"... Eh whatever. You guys are dismissed." Pauline shrugged as Heather (McNamara) left the house immediately after Veronica did so. The rest let out groans of relief, all they now had to do was to decorate the assigned level and prepare the costumes. _'I was so sure that Sawyer and Duke were dating...'_

XXXXXX

"Hey... uh, Duke? Where are the Chandlers?" Veronica asked after a fruitless search for Heather (Chandler) and her mother. Heather (McNamara) shrugged, making her way to Heather (Duke)'s kitchen. "Mac, shouldn't you have some decency as a guest?"

"Fuck, I see Duke more often than I see my own folks!"

"... Unfortunately, she's right. God, do the McNamaras trust me with her more than themselves?" Heather (Duke) sighed, pulling out a green book and a pen. "Oh right, they went to the hospital. Chandler's sister woke up."

"That's great! Does this mean we'll be seeing her sister too?!" Heather (McNamara) exclaimed from the kitchen, loud rattling accompanying her words. "Sweet! Duke just bought tons of spam!"

"It's for the Chandlers! Don't eat them, you're already fucking fat anyways!" Heather (Duke) laughed, writing something in her book. Veronica noticed, and slid over to her shoulder to get a better look.

 _[1-10-17_

 _It's been a week since my therapist suggested I have a diary, and I think it's hella cool? Sorta, I mean it doesn't really help... but penning down thoughts on paper sounds hipstery?_

 _So I invited Veronica over (and Mac but she doesn't give a shit about invites) via Mac and I'm like, low-key guilty because I told her that I liked her back yesterday but I'm not showing it? But she did come over, and I bought a fuck load of luncheon meat cans so that I could distract Mac from us and maybe I'll pull Veronica somewhere to talk about feelings and shit? Oh Jesus Christ, Brooke and Michael are influencing me._

 _I guess my depression is getting better? Ok so I still have abandonment issues and maybe I still cry into my pillow every now and then, but you're a book, you won't judge me right? Right?]_

"Have I ever told you how pretty your handwriting is?" Heather jumped at Veronica's comment, and immediately turned around only to come face to face with Veronica. "Oh right, first rule of owning a diary is to never look into others."

"How much did you see anyways?"

"All of it?" Veronica replied breezily, a smirk forming on her face seconds later. "So, 'feelings and shit' huh?"

"What, you want me to write in here that I wanna kiss you? Because that's only when you're dating someone." Heather rolled her eyes good-naturedly, she had after all, pretty much told Veronica everything yesterday. "But really, as much as the feeling's mutual... you know that I'm a shitty person to date."

"And like I said, I don't care. Isn't the point of being in a relationship is to support each other?"

"I thought that's only when you're past the honeymoon stage."

"You have honeymelons?! Where?!" Heather (McNamara) asked, popping her head out of the kitchen only to see Veronica bringing Heather (Duke) closer to her body. Heather (McNamara) blinked, slinking back into the kitchen to hunt for the elusive honeydews (that never existed in the Dukes' residence).

XXXXXX

You know the feeling when you have no mood to do anything but stare into blank space? Yeah, that's what I'm feeling now. Can't even concentrate on studying _or_ writing. Fuck my life. Okay, I'll bring my problems outta this chapter, see ya!


End file.
